I, Sakura
by Rai Lockhart
Summary: I, Sakura, am in love with Shikamaru Nara. I, Sakura, want to tell him. And I, Sakura, have just made the biggest mistake of my life. Read and review
1. Bestfriend

**A/N: Hey ya'll. New story coming at you. I hope you enjoy it. It's called I, Sakura, and is a ShikaSaku fanfiction. I hope you all enjoy; comments and reviews are appreciated. 2nd chapter being worked on as we speak. I have a whole lotta random chapters (it might be long, depending on if you guys like it or not) so review to get more! Sorry for being so inactive... Hope you like!**

The bell rang as yet another year of school began. I could already tell that this was going to be a long year. I frowned, propping my head on my hand and staring at the teacher at the front of the class. She was lecturing us on the student code of conduct, which was something I did not want to sit through, again.

"Sakura." My attention was jerked to my right side, where the whisper orignated from. Sitting next to me was none other than my good friend and the smartest kid I had ever met, Nara Shikamaru. He was grinning at me.

I smiled back, trying to seem interested in the lecture going on so the blood wouldn't rise into my cheeks. He just rolled his eyes at my apparent interest, and went back to whatever he was doing before.

As long as I can remember, I have known Shikamaru. We used to play together when we were little, and have gone to the same school since middle. He's basically the best guy friend I have. We tell each other everything, just like we always have. Everyone thinks he's brutally honest to their faces. You should hear what he has to say behind their backs. He's the number one complainer, and one of the laziest people I've ever known. And one thing I've noticed about Shikamaru:

Not much has changed about him.

Well, he has gotten taller, and much cuter, but I'd never let him know that. I mean, come on! What am I supposed to say?

Okay, okay, I'll say it.

I have a crush on Shikamaru.

It all started about the end of freshman year. I had art last, and he had band. We were in the same building, so we walked to the pick up line together. We would talk like the old friends we were, laughing when something stupid happened to the other and whatnot. It was in those few minutes of fun every day that my infatuation for him began.

Over the summer, I saw more and more of him, and it just kept continuing to escalated. We spent a lot of time together, and I found myself wanting and thinking of him more and more as time passed.

At first I denied it, then it was overlooked as just a simple crush that would go away. It's been about six months, maybe more, and I still like him.

So, as I sat next to him in biology, it was hard to keep my thought away from his grin, which I knew was plastered onto his face right now.

"Don't tell me you're actually listening to this stuff. You may not be top of the class, but even you know all of this by heart by now. We've only been over it in every class since sixth grade." The whisper caught my attention again, and this time I turned to face him. "You memorize things like crazy, you should have this down by now."

"I still want to make a good impression on the teacher. And for your information, Mr. Head of the Class, being in the top twenty isn't so bad," I replied, giving him a slight glare. I should explain something, right now: Shikamaru might be the laziest person I know, never doing his work, and continually sleeping through tests. But when he was younger, his mother was called in to watch him for a day, and ever since then, he has put in effort. And that small amount of effort, coupled with the fact that he's brilliant and every teacher loves him, he gets amazing grades. I hate it. I might be smart, but I memorize and apply. He just knows everything. Hard work and some intelligence can only get you so far in school.

"Ms. Haruno. I would appreciate it if you would pay attention when I am talking to the class." My face tinged red, as I whipped my head back to look at the teacher, green eyes wide. The rest of the class was in silent giggles, laughing at my misfortune. I sent another slight glare to Shikamaru, who was laughing along with them.

"Thanks," I said sarcastically once the teacher had turned to yell at another student for sleeping. He just shot me another grin.

"It's not my fault you attract attention like no one else I know, Sakura," he whispered yet again.

I laughed, causing another glare from the teacher, and a full blown smile from Shikamaru.

"Mr. Nara, making Ms. Haruno act up is not an example that the head of the class should be setting."

"Yeah, Shikamaru. I don't need any distractions while I'm trying to pay attention," I fake scolded. The teacher smiled, thinking I had changed my ways.

He just scowled and turned his attention away from me to some of the other kids in the class. "Troublesome..." he muttered. I grinned in triumph before returning my gaze to the teacher.

Her lecture was still just as boring, but since there was no Shikamaru trying to talk to me, I listened. Cells phones aren't allowed in class, blah blah blah. The only thing I noticed was the fact that the woman was wearing a thick mask of make up, making her flatish face look even more like a zombie's.

My thoughts slowly drifted from the time back to Shikamaru, and I stole a glance at his face. He had his head on his desk, and looked as though he was about to fall asleep.

I sighed. Typical. Even for the head of the class, he was definitely the laziest person I knew. Everything just came so easy to him, he didn't even have to try to get perfect grades in whatever he did. As for me, I didn't put all the effort I could, but it still didn't come as easily to me as it did to him.

Suddenly, his head snapped up, and he caught me staring at him. He shot me a quizzical look. I replied with a shrug of my shoulders, as if to say I looked at him at the same second.

The class dragged on in silence as the teacher wrote on the board. Shikamaru was already asleep. I was staring off into space, thinking more about my girlish fantasies involving a certain Nara than biology.

The bell rang once again, signifying the end of class. I jerked my head up, unaware that I had fallen asleep. I quickly packed my things, and stood up. In my rush to get out of the door, I slammed into Inuzuka Kiba. My book bag came off, and a few books spilled out of the top. I guess I'd forgotten to close it...

"I'm so sorry, Kiba," I quickly apologized, wanting to get away so I could find my next class. I bent down, stuffing the crap that was coming out back into my bag. The first day, and I still had enough stuff in my book bag to make it look like a mess.

"It's okay, Sakura," he replied, looking me over. "You've changed over the summer," he noted.

I tinged red once again, and I noticed Shikamaru giving a slight glare to Kiba. They had never liked each other, even when we were little. I had played with Kiba when I was little because our parents were good friends. He and Shikamaru were second cousins or something crazy like that. Unlike Shikamaru and I, Kiba and I grew apart as we got older. He became more popular, and I just stayed the same amount of loser. "I hadn't noticed," I finally replied, laughing it off. He smiled, and walked off. I hurried toward the stairs, wanting to get to my next class as soon as possible.

"What was that about?" A slightly agitated voice spoke.

"I accidentally ran into Kiba. Look, I'm sorry. Next time, I'll choose someone you like more to run into," I replied, sounding slightly sarcastic.

Shikamaru just looked elsewhere, and mumbled, "He didn't even bother to help you pick up your books."

"Riiight. Well, see you later, Shikamaru." I waved and headed up the stairs. He just waved, and slid past a group to catch up with some of his band buddies.

My day passed.

So far, nothing had compared to biology. That might or might not have been for the fact that none of my other classes had Shikamaru, but I'll just ignore that for know.

Lunch came. It was right before my last class of the day, and I was worried. As far as I knew, none of my friends had this lunch, so I was worried I'd have to drop in on someone. But there I spotted her; one of my good friends, Ino. She waved me over, and I smiled as I sat down with her and a few of her junior friends. Among them was Hyuuga Neji, Tenten, and Uchiha Sasuke, a lone sophomore. I had heard of him before, but I had never met him. He was really quiet, and I had known a lot of girls who had crushes on him. He was pretty cute...

It wasn't until English that anything was interesting. My last class of the day, go figure. I walked in, and took a seat in the last row. I recognized all most all of my fellow students. Aburame Shino sat a few rows over, his curly head above everyone else's. Uzumaki Naruto, the class clown, was also in here. He had liked me since we were little kids in elementary school, but I just... didn't return the compliment. He was so strange at times, and he seemed like a real outcast. Everyone always made fun of him, but he just took it in stride. I had to admire that about him, but it didn't mean that I liked him. Hyuuga Hinata sat down in front of me, giving me a shy smile. Now, here was the perfect person for Naruto. You know what they say, opposites attract.

Finally, one of the last to walk into the door was Kiba, looking as arrogant as ususal and having all the girls swoon. They seemed to like his jack-assish attitude, especially when he flirted relentlessly with them. He nodded in my direction. Seriously, would it ever hurt to say hi? A nod only goes so far. The tardy bell rang, and the class grew silent, waiting for the teacher to start.

The teacher, Ms. Yuhi, stood up in front of the class. "Until I know your names, I'd like for you all to sit in my seating chart. When I call your name, go to the seat I point to."

She went down the list, and we students moved as we were called. It's just my luck that I got stuck in the front of the middle row. On my right was Shino, who was more that a little odd. But a pretty cool kid, as far as my opinion goes. Behind me was Sai, another genius. He wasn't quite on Shikamaru's level, but he was smart. On my left was Kiba.

It was an overload of testosterone, I'm telling you. Sai's knees dug into my back as he leaned backward. I just sat there, listening to Ms. Yuhi go on and on about the rules of the classroom, feeling quite agitated when his knees refused to leave my back.

"Hey, Sai, lay off of her, okay?" Kiba's voice broke my evil ranting thoughts, and I felt the knees in my back go away.

"Whatever you say, Kibble-kun," Sai said as he straightened back into his chair. I turned, surprised, to Kiba.

"Thanks," I muttered. He just smiled, and mumbled something that sounded like 'No prob."

I went back to listening, slightly in a daze. Kiba was acknowledging me more than he had in years, and I felt strangely... disgusted.

Class passed. We talked about what we would need, and got started on a worksheet. The bell rang, dismissing us from our first day of torture, and I frowned. I was going to have a lot of homework on my first day.

As I walked out the door, something snagged my book bag. I was pulled backwards, right next to the jerk himself, Kiba.

"We should hang out sometime, Sakura," he said casually.

I stood in shock as he moved ahead to his friends. It wasn't until a single thought passed through my head that I was able to move again.

_Now that is something to tell Shikamaru,_ I mused.

I slid past many of the clumps of students in the hallway, anxious to see his face once again. He was no where to be found...

"Hey, kiddo. What are you doing, keeping a lookout for someone special?" Frowning, I turned to Shikamaru. Kiddo was his pet name for me, and he used it too much for my tastes. I had asked him not to call me that, especially not at school, but he didn't listen. It had almost caught on, until I threatened to punch the next person to say it through a wall. Shikamaru had made himself the exception.

"Nah. Just you," I joked, and he shoved me as we walked down the path to the front of the school, so we could continue our walk home. The school wasn't too far from our houses, but our stop was one of the last on the route. We talked about our day, and what we thought of our classes and classmates. Our conversation was filled with stories.

With a wide grin, I turned to Shikamaru. "And then, guess what he said!"

"Um, I hate you and you should go die?" My stare became frosty as Shikamaru cringed slightly. "Okay, okay... What did he say?"

I mimicked his arrogant, everyone loves me tone with ease. "'We should have out sometime, Sakura.' As if I'd actually fall for that! He probably ran out of other ugly girls to laugh at, and I became his new target. Aha, that loser. We might have lost our friendship, but still. He should know me better than to have me fall for that."

Shikamaru just rolled his eyes. "Whatever. Hey, I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" He flashed my a smile that made my heart race.

"Y-Yeah, sure. Tomorrow." I walked on to my house in silence, still feeling the effects of his last smile.

The feeling was amazing.

** A/N: Okay, that was it. It's not the longest chapter ever, and definitely not the best I've done so far in terms of this story and my others. It's more to get things started off, see how you guys like the plot so far, and the characters. Oh, and of course, if I get enough hits to continue. That's a big must right there. So be ready to review! It's nice to be back on the writing scene again. I left to get some computer stuff fixed and work on this story and a few others. I have an Ouran fic, and maybe and Avatar fic. And some good Naruto fics, of course. I'm also expanding my animes, so any help there is nice! If you read my other stories, I might as well say it... I'm just not as into InoCho as I was before, and LeeIno was a dare... ShikaSaku and NaruIno are my two favorites, so expect some NaroIno soon. I only like InoCho for reading, aha. REMEMBER! Read, Review, and tell me if you want more of this story and others!**

**Rai Lockhart, signing off. Love ya!**


	2. This Doubtful Feeling

**A/N: New chapter up. Hope ya'll enjoy. So long in coming... I know, I'm such a bad updater. This one is longer, though! Yay!**

I've had it with school. I've only been here for five weeks, and I already want to leave forever. Never come back. Nevereverever. "Hmph."

"Is today everyone make funny noises day?" Shikamaru was suddenly beside me as I walked, looking at me with a curious expression on his face.

"No, why?" I asked as we passed a group of populars. That was Ino's crowd, but Shikamaru and I despised most of them. They acted like they were all that and a bag of chips. But we all knew that they really weren't. "Pfft."

"You keep on making them." He followed my gaze to the crowd of 'preppy' kids, and frowned. "God, what is with them? I remember back when we used to know all of them, and they actually used to talk to us. It's not like we have a disease or anything."

"Correction: I don't have a disease. They don't know bout you." I smiled as he elbowed me playfully, and laughed a little when he tripped over his own feet from lack of concentration. He gave me a small glare, and opened his mouth to say my name in that hateful tone.

"Sakura!"

Shikamaru and I both froze; that wasn't his voice. I spun around, and came face to face with Sasuke. "Oh, hey, Sasuke. What's up?" Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Shikamaru stand up, brush himself off, and give Sasuke a glare while he talked to me. Sasuke seemed unfazed... Either that, or he didn't notice/care. I wouldn't doubt if he got that enough to just ignore it.

"Nothing really. I was just talking to Karin, a good friend of mine. She's throwing this huge party in a few weeks, and she wants everyone to be there. I figured you were a part of everyone, so... you get an official invite from me, okay?" He stopped, and looked over at Shikamaru, who looked relatively surprised. I shot him a confused look, and then turned back to Sasuke. "Shikamaru can come, too. In fact, invite anyone you know. Her house is huge, so it's all good." I couldn't speak, so I just nodded in agreement. He smiled, and walked away. "I'll give you the details later! Just make sure to get the word out!" I nodded again.

Shikamaru moved in to fill the vacancy left by Sasuke. We both stood silently for a second, watching him walk away. My first real party, all from sitting with him at lunch. He really was an awesome friend.

"So." I turned my head slightly to look at Shikamaru as soon as I heard him speak. "You're not actually thinking of going to that, are you? I mean, a party like that..." He trailed off, looking up at the sky. It was a favorite pastime of his that I used to make fun of him for, but now it relaxes me as well. I turned my attention from him to some freshmen walking past, back to Shikamaru.

"I might go. I mean, it sounds okay to me. Sasuke's a pretty cool guy, and so are some of his friends. You?"

"If you go, I'll go. Doesn't sound like the worst way to spend a weekend night, especially if we can convince enough of our friends to go." He started walking again, unexpectedly, and I rushed in to follow him. I knew that the bell was going to ring for classes to start soon, and I wanted to show up to class with him in tow. We walked in silence some more, and then, out of know where, the genius spoke. "You don't like that Sasuke kid, do you? I mean, you sure acted like it."

I was taken aback by his question. What reason did he have to go around asking my something like that? It wasn't his business, in the first place. "Why do you care?"

"Just curious. Should I take that as a yes?"

"Take it as a no. I mean, I like Sasuke, but... he's just my friend. And most definitely not my type, ya know?" My head filled with the thought of 'my type'. Of course, he was walking right beside me, so I didn't have to think too hard to get a good visual. We were getting close to the classroom now.

"And what happens to be your type, hmmm?" Why he was so curious was beyond me. Could this mean...? No. Never.

"Oh, you know. Stuck up jock boys with chips on their shoulders." We both had a little laugh at my sarcastic tone, and Shikamaru opened his mouth to respond to my nasty little comment about our old friend.

"SAKURA!" This, once again, was not Shikamaru's voice. I looked around, and too my horror saw someone I would have rather not seen at the moment. But, you know what they say, right? Speak of the devil, and the devil shall appear. Coming toward me, trying to look cool surrounded by his friends, was Kiba. Nooooooo. "Hey, I'm glad I found you. I just got an invite to a party at Karin's place. Big stuff, you probably haven't heard of it. Wondered if you wanted to go. You know, with me." His friend nodded in agreement. Apparently, anything he said was good enough for a cult following.

"Sorry to burst your bubble, Kiba-kunnn," I said with a sickeningly sweet voice. Shikamaru flashed a grin at my obvious fakeness. "I heard it from my good friend Sasuke," I let the news that I was friends with someone more popular than him sink in, "and I got asked to go with someone a little after I got the invite from him. If only you had asked sooner, maybe..." I bit my lip in order to look innocent and vulnerable. I just loved playing with him like this.

"Aw, that's too bad. Who's the lucky guy?"

Shit.Shitshitshit. I hadn't thought of a guy. Nononono. I need a cover up. A believable cover up. "Well, actually, it's Shikamaru-kun. He asked me and I didn't think I'd get any other offers, so I accepted. I'm so sorry." The sorry actually extended to Shikamaru as well, as it was my fault he was being dragged headfirst into something like this. Poor kid. Kiba nodded, and beckoned for his 'crew' to leave with him.

"Me. Out of all the people you could have pretended, you picked me?" Shikamaru was looking at me as though I had done him a great disservice. Mean kid. At least he has a date to the party now.

"Well, you were the closest to me," I said, waving off the issue with my hand as I stepped into the room.

"And you made it sound like I was a last resort, too. Thanks," He added meanly. He didn't seem too happy with me. I just smiled as a way of saying I'm sorry, get over it, and turned to start a new day of being completely and everlastingly bored with the stupid subject. Yay.

The class dragged on and on. And on. And then some. And finally we reached where we only have an hour left in an hour and thirty minute class. Yes, I really was that tired of biology already. "So Sakura," a girlish voice said as I started to fall asleep. I turned a bit to see some random chick I never really talked to, Yuki. She looked very, very interested in something. "I heard from a friend who has a friend with a sister who knows this guy who heard it from his girlfriend's cousin who got a text that said that someone said that he knew that she said that Kiba himself said that you were going to a party with Shikamaru."

News travels fast and through a lot of people. "Yeah, I am."

"Are you two a couple now? I mean, it was a long time in coming. There's a lot of speculation; pity dates, secret affairs... Kiba says he just asked first, but a lot of people are guessing otherwise. And I wanted to know from the girl herself: Why?" She leaned toward me a bit more, and I was afraid she was going to fall out of her seat.

I looked around the room nervously. Anything was welcome to take my mind off of this question. Yet, I found nothing. "It's just a friend thing. Kiba's right, he asked first. Nothing more, nothing less." I shrugged it off, going back to trying to listen to zombie teacher talk.

"So would you have gone with Kiba if he had asked first?"

"I don't know, I guess so. Why?" She was getting annoying. Good reason never to talk to her.

"Oh, no reason." Bt she had her cell out, texting away to all the unknowns connected to her. Soon, the entire school would be buzzing of Kiba and I. I turned back to the teacher only to see Shikamaru out of the corner of my eye. It was all I could do not to stare at him sleeping at his desk... My head was jerked up once the bell rang. I quickly pulled the pen off of my face, and looked around confusedly. Wait... I had just...

It took me a second to realize that I had fallen asleep at my desk for about an hour. Oh, joy. What if the teacher actually said something interesting? Wouldn't that be ironic.

I waited for a second for a second for the group of kids to walk by and Shikamaru to emerge from the back of their group. He walked up to me, smirked, and then licked his finger. "What are you doing, you crazy weirdo?" I asked as he moved the wet finger close to my face.

"It looks like you fell asleep on your pen. Do you want me to get the ink off or not?" I nodded, and he moved closer to me, placing his hand on my cheek to get a better angle at the ink spot. Despite trying desperately to hide my feelings, I turned slightly red. Slowly, I nodded. He licked his finger again, and leaned in close to my face. I closed my eyes quickly as he wiped the ink off my cheek, trying not to breathe in his scent or look at his face. I know, I have a problem.

And in an instant, he was gone. "Hey, Sakura, what's wrong with you? You look weird standing there with your eyes closed, not breathing and all."

"I'm feeling a little sick," I lied quickly. "I didn't want to breathe on you or anything, and closing my eyes helped me hold my breath." He shot me a strange glance, as though he could tell I was lying.

"And I just touched you? Ew, I hope I don't get sick," he said as he made a much more humorous face, and I laughed as we walked out the door. I waved goodbye to him, and moved on to my next class. He didn't wave back.

The hours flew by as lunch approached. I know I said that I didn't like Sasuke, I know I did. But I still couldn't wait to see him. It was like what happened with Shikamaru, only I wouldn't end up liking Sasuke... that much. Right? Right?

I always sucked at lying to myself.

Finally, lunch came. I grabbed my bag, and made a quickwalk for the door. Over the past few weeks, I found out that if I rush a little faster than normal, I can catch up to Sasuke and walk with him to lunch. So that's exactly what I did, slowing down just before I reached him. "Hey, Sasuke!" I said enthusiastically as I appeared beside him.

"Hey, Sakura," he said with a little smile.

"What's up?" This was a little game that we played on our way to lunch. Well, I thought of it as a game. He might just think of it as annoying. I fretted for a second over whether he might think of my as annoying, then caught myself. I don't like him. He's only a friend. Only a friend.

"Nothing really. So I heard you were going to Karin's party with Shikamaru. Are my sources correct?" He seemed genuinely interested, just like always.

I played nervously with the edges of my shirt. I had no idea why I was so nervous. Sasuke shouldn't have this power over me.

"Hello? Sakura?"

"Oh, yeah. Sorry, the question. Yeah... It was more or less a last minute thing. I didn't want to go with Kiba, and Shikamaru was right there... Now it's like the biggest piece of news in a while. Who knew, right? Not that I mind going with Shikamaru," I added quickly, because I didn't want to give the wrong impression. Shikamaru was a great date. A really, really great date. "It's just weird to go on a date with him. Why?"

"No reason. Karin wanted me to take you, but if you're going with Shikamaru, that can't happen."

"Karin wanted you to take me?" I asked.

"Don't get the wrong impression here; I would love to take you. But she wanted to meet you. Apparently, I've said enough about you to get her interested. I'll just have to steal you away from him and let you meet her yourself."

Sasuke was going to ask me? Why didn't he ask sooner? "Yeah, that would be fun," I said nonchalantly as we arrived in the cafeteria. He jut smiled as we took our seats, and our lunch began.

It felt like just as soo as it had begun, my break time during the day was over. The nice thing about the lunch I was in was that I only has one class left until my day was over, and I was pretty good at it. So it's not like I was busting my brain for the last bit of my day.

Luckily, we had a test, and we were supposed to be reading, but the teacher had stepped out for a moment. Only a second, I swear. So, of course, everyone starts to talk. Normally, I'm the good student that doesn't say a word, but today, in Ms. Yuhi's absence, I felt I just had to talk to someone. Or, more or less, someone had to talk to me.

"I don't know why you'd want to go with him."

"Kiba, what are you talking about?" The annoying voice beside me was talking to me. I could see him looking at me, his wolfish eyes staring as a grin alighted his face.

"You seem angry; have you heard, then?" I turned to face him completely. I guess he could tell from the shocked look on my face that I hadn't heard.

"Kiba, what are you talking about?"

"Well now, don't you seem surprised. I guess you would be; the one who is being talked about is usually the last to find out." He stopped as though he was going to make me beg, but I gave him such a death glare I think I might have scared him into telling me. "Okay. Well, I heard that someone was talking about you recently. Apparently, you're untrustworthy, clingy, and you're a bad friend that this person hangs out with because they feel sorry for you."

"And that has to do with Shikamaru how?" I asked, even though I had a sinking feeling I knew the connection.

"Come on, Sakura. You're a smart girl. It's part of what makes you cute," he said in an attempt to flirt, but stopped talking when the sad look hit my face.

"He'd never... not me. Not Shikamaru..." I shifted my glance toward the ground, reassuring myself that Shikamaru would never say that stuff about me. Maybe about someone else, but not me. Not his best friend. There was no reason, no reason at all! It's not like he'd been ignoring me or I'd been annoying him... Right? I could feel the doubt try and plant itself in me. "Not true at all..."

Kiba looked quite unamused by my ramblings. "Sakura, listen to yourself. You know for a fact this is something he'd say. Even about his closest friends." A flashback of why Shikamaru and Kiba hated each other now hit me. Shikamaru had told another kid on the block something, and it got around to Kiba. They fought for days, and now they hardly ever look at each other. God, no... "You know it's possible. Don't even try to deny it."

"You're lying, Kiba. You're just jealous that he's going with me. That you aren't."

"Even for me, this is low, Sakura." The grin has long since left his face.

"You're lying, Kiba. I won't believe you. He's my best friend."

"Fine, don't believe me. It's not me he's talking about. It's you who's going to be hurt."

"This isn't true. You're lying."

"You can keep saying that, you know. Eventually you'll either believe me or forget it. This isn't something I'd really bother lying about. It's low."

That statement left me empty on the inside. He was right. This was low, even for him. To try and make me hate my best friend... And the fact he recognized that? I needed to talk to Shikamaru. Now. But I was in class... And for the rest of that class period, I was in shock. As soon as the bell rang, I was out of there, dashing through the halls. I cringed every time I heard a "I'm so sorry, Sakura," or "Shhh... That's her." It stung my heart like a bee stings someone's skin. And it felt as though I was allergic to this type of sting.

Soon, I was outside, looking around for that familiar face.

"Well, kiddo, this seems familiar," Shikamaru said, the grin apparent in his voice. But he immediately knew something was up. His face was suddenly serious. "Sakura, what's wrong? You look upset. What happened?" Just seeing him was calming my nerves. There was no way he'd do something like that. What was I thinking, believing Kiba? Aha, I could be so gullible.

"It's nothing. It's just something Kiba told me that you said."

"What are you talking about?"

"Well, he said that you said I was a bad friend that you only hang out with because you feel sorry for me, I'm untrustworthy, and clingy. But I know you wouldn't say anything like that about me."

He looked away quickly, not saying a word. My confidence dropped a bit, and I moved my head to try to catch his eye again. "Shikamaru?"

"So you heard..." Suddenly, I felt sick. Very, very sick. He was saying something, but I couldn't hear him. How could I listen to him?

"You aren't saying... You didn't say..."I was looking at the ground. He was trying to tell me something. But I didn't want to hear anything more, so I ran.

"SAKURA! Where are you going? I told you, I didn't say a word!"

But I couldn't hear him over the roar of the students. His words were lost. And I was still under the impression my best friend wasn't my friend at all.

The feeling was the worst.

**A/N: Don't kill me! I know, they're best friends... how could this happen? But it's possible. Yep! So yeah. Another chapter coming. Originally, there was only going to be one chapter to express all that happens in the next one or two chapters, but it works a whole lot better in small doses, so I can explain things more fully and let you all experience things like Sakura (in my story) would experience. Toward the end, Shikamaru does try to tell her he didn't say that stuff, but she ignored him, a fact which will be pointed out later. Hope you enjoyed!**

**  
REVIEW, PLEASE? And sorry for any mistakes; no beta and I'm not looking... =**

**  
Rai Lockhart**


	3. Breaking Apart

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait. Had to get though some sickness and stuff. And I was wondering, how many of you actually read my authors notes? You know, if I was really mean, I'd put my plot idea in here, and see how many people read it. Ooooh, evil. COMMENT! NOW! Or, uh, AFTER READING!**

**Just thought I'd tell you that I will start setting a min limit for updates. Aha, j/k. I'm not that mean nor that obsessed with comments. But I do like them. I have the next chappie written, so comment to get it! /end**

Just a few hours after my world came crashing down, I found myself lying on my couch, staring at the ceiling.

I wasn't feeling too hot, to tell you the truth. It was like a part of me had died, and I was trying to live with only half a heart or some lung. Not easy, but survivable. I think.

How was it even possible? How could he say something like that? About _me?_

He couldn't have. That was it. Only solution. But then again... He didn't deny it. He never denied it. And he never called me to make sure I was okay or anything.

Heartless bastard. That's what he was. How could he say those things about me? I'm his friend! His BEST damn friend in the world. Well, who knows about that anymore. Apparently I'm a sympathy case, only to be talked to when he feels bad for me. Which apparently is all the time. Because that stupid kid wouldn't shut up. EVER. That's probably what happened. He was sitting there, talking it all up, being the complete ass I know he is and spilled his guts.

My breathing got harder and louder as I got more and more angry. I took this moment to forget that Shikamaru wasn't really much for lots of in-depth talking, especially to those people who aren't me. But I rationalized this thinking with thoughts that he was being 'abducted' by all of his band friends. They were taking over his life. I was being pushed into the background, a small voice in the sea of those kids.

Fine then! If he can get new friends to replace me, then I'll get new friends to replace him!

"SEE IF I CARE!" I screamed at the attentive ceiling. Of course, it had no response for me. It just mocked and stayed right where it was.

"See if you care about what, honey? You know, it's not healthy to scream at ceilings." My mother paused in the doorway to the living room, hand on the frame. She looked at me with concern. "You haven't moved from that spot on the couch since you got home from school. Sakura, what's wrong?"

"Oh, so not moving and yelling at ceilings are signs of a teen-aged disaster?"

"Normally, yes." She moved quietly to the chair near the couch, and sat down. I sighed loudly, diverting my eyes back to the white, textured ceiling. My mother was a doctor at the local hospital; one of the best medical professionals in this huge city. Sadly enough, in college, she also got a minor in psychology. Life sucks when you're a certain teen-aged, pink haired girl with a flaky best friend and a mother who goes all analytical on your mind when you just want to simmer in your anger. "So, tell me. Does it have to do with a certain Nara boy?"

My head spun so fast that my neck hurt as I looked into her similar emerald eyes. "W-What? How did..."

"He kept calling and calling. When I finally picked up, he just said 'Troublesome... I'm so sorry.' and hung up. Now, would you mind telling me why he would do that before I have to call him up and have a joint session with the two of you? I will, you know." And she would, I knew. The last thing I needed was to see Shikamaru.

"Well, Shikamaru said some really mean things about me that got back to me by way of Kiba, and it made me really angry. So when I went to talk to him, I ended up storming off without saying goodbye, just running away. I was in shock that he would say this crap, but now the shock is gone, and I'm just stuck. I don't get it!" I let out another aggravated sigh, and glared back up at the ceiling, imagining a spike falling from it and crushing me to end my misery. Ah, life would just be perfect if that would happen, but alas... nothing came of my daydream.

"Are you sure that he really said those things? I mean, high school rumors aren't the most reliable things in the world."

"I asked him and he NEVER DENIED it! He just sounded disappointed that I had heard about it. I had to stand there, stunned, as he rambled on about something stupid, like his reasons for saying it... I don't really remember, because I wasn't paying attention. But still! He never said he didn't say it! How can I believe him? How?" I turned over, lying on my stomach now. The ceiling had disappointed me but not finishing me off, and I can't stand things that disappoint me. Not anymore.

My mother moved to the edge of the couch, and placed a hand on my back. "Sounds like he might have defended himself when you weren't listening. Anyway, why would you believe Kiba over Shikamaru? He's your best friend, and Kiba has been ignoring you, for the most part, for years. Why believe him now?"

"Because! Well... Shikamaru, um, he says stuff like this all the time!" Even to me, it sounded weak. But I had this feeling in my gut that it was true. "And Kiba, even he knew it was a bad thing to lie about. Even he knew that it was low. Everyone in the entire school had known by then, and I think Shikamaru was getting mad about Sasuke, and might have said something to someone. I don't know! Why would he care about Sasuke that much? Sasuke's just a friend! Well, so is Shikamaru, but Sasuke is too! I... I don't know why I can't believe him. I mean, sure he's lied. In the past, people have told me a lot of things, but none of them got to me like this one. I could just be being a silly drama queen, but I don't think it is a rumor. I think Shikamaru is trying to leave me behind, or make reasons for hanging out with me with all of his band friends. I was really scared when he started hanging out with them even more, and... and..." I broke off in sobs, pushing my head even further into the cushions. My mother gave me a quick hug.

"It's okay, it's okay. You're scared. You're scared he's going to leave you behind, and you're going to be clinging to what's left of your childhood friend. And, from what I gather, you like this Sasuke, and you're afraid about what that could mean for you and Shikamaru. You're angry with him for things that he wouldn't do. All this is just ways for your brain to excuse things you've been feeling. To validate the reasons why he would rather spend time with these band kids than you. It's natural, for most kids, to feel this way, especially when they have more than platonic feelings for a friend." My eyes opened wide as she stood up. She... knew? "Well, I've got to go to work, darling. Night shifts this week." And with that, she left. I was still in shock that she knew. And if she knew, then what if he knew? Noooooo.

I sighed once again, and resumed my position of staring at the ceiling. I've been sighing a lot today... ever since Shikamaru had to go and be so stupid. The emptiness flowed back into my veins, making my life a complete nothing once again. I wished I had homework to concentrate on or something, but no teacher had assigned anything today. Maybe I could go read a book, but I was in the middle of a love story, and frankly; I can't stand reading one right now. Usually, watching Pride and Prejudice would make me feel better, but that would just make me hate my life even more.

A heard a shuffling in the kitchen as my mother left to go to work. A car pulled up, most likely my father, and a door shut. I tried to block out the sounds as much as possible. I didn't want to hear my parents feeling normal. I always hate when I get mad or depressed and the world goes on as usual. I mean, I know it should. But for once, I just wish that the world would slow down and grieve with me.

"Sakura?" I froze, completely. There was no way in hell that my mother would ever let him in. "Sakura, we need to talk. I have a feeling you didn't hear me the last time." He sat in the chair my mother had just used. Ugh, I'm gonna have to burn that chair now. Stupid spiky haired Nara.

"Get out," I said in a monotone voice.

"Sakura, we need to talk."

"Get out."

"Look, this is important!"

"So is going to the dentist every 6 months or something. Get out!"

"Dentist? What? Uh, who cares; I came here to talk."

"I'm not going to tell you again," I said, my anger rising.

"Hey, don't get mad at me!"

"I told you to GET OUT!"

"So that's it? You're just going to believe him?" I could hear the anger in his voice. Like he had a right to be angry at me! Well, I guess there was a chance I was wrong. But no! I was right!

"Shikamaru..."

"Sakura, I THOUGHT we were friends! Best friends!"

"Yeah, well, so did I! We were!"

"Then how, HOW can you not believe me? How can you believe HIM over ME!"

"How can I believe you? All you do is talk about other people and spread gossip! I wouldn't be surprised if you wanted it to get out so that way you could talk about me all the time!" In one long, graceful movement, I moved from my uncaring, laid back couch position to sitting up, leaning toward him. I didn't realize it, but I was starting to cry. He was killing me on the inside.

"Sakura, I would never say something like that about you. I tried to tell you that this afternoon, but you wouldn't listen... Sakura, I..." He stopped, and looked away. "There is a chance someone might have twisted my words around..." I knew it! He's lying!

"How could you come over to my house and lie to me like this? Don't you have any dignity at all? Any respect for what I'm going through? Look at me! I'm a goddamn wreck, and all you do is just sit there and lie to my face! Please, Shikamaru." I stopped, and looked at him through my tearful green eyes. "Just... please leave me alone." His eyes opened wide, and he kind if reached out for me, as though he was going to console me. But then he pulled his hand back in, and dipped his head so I couldn't see his eyes. I felt my heart break once more o see him like this, and I had to remind myself that he was lying to me.

He stood up, and it looked as though I had really hurt him. "So that's it?" He asked softly. "You're just going to believe him? Give up on our friendship? Sakura, I won't stay if it will hurt you. I'll... I'm gonna go." I felt bad, I really did. What if he wasn't lying? But I knew he was. All this acting was a front, to guilt me into not spilling his secrets. He moved toward the door.

"Shikamaru..." I said, surprising myself. He paused at the door, but then thought better of it, and left. I got up, and watched him as he got in his car and drove away, the emptiness filling with sadness. **(Dumb question, but who's side are you on? I want to know! )**

I felt pitiful, and horrible. What have I done? Believing this rumor about Shikamaru and I. It was Kiba. Kiba would lie. It wasn't true. What have I done?

But then the image of Kiba filled my mind. He didn't look like he was acting. And everyone else knew... And Shikamaru had been pushing me away in favor of his new friends. He'd been shoving me away, and telling people things I had told him in confidence so that way he would get 'in' with his buddies. He'd even been acting really cold to me all today, and for the past few weeks he's been acting weird. And then he came here, and lied to me! How could he?

His hurt face appeared in my mind, and I knew that something was up. But there was no denying that it was true. Someone twisting his words around? HA! The anger flooded back in, and I got an idea through my head. I needed to replace Shikamaru as a date to the party, right? I went and grabbed my cell, flipping through my contacts until I found the one I was looking for. I smiled as the name came up, letting my emotions carry me though the dialing and the ringing. It was a strange sensation. Usually I was kind of freaked to talk to people on the phone. But my adrenaline rush from anger was really tiding my fear over. I could probably jump off a cliff with a bungee cord or go get a needle in my arm or something if I really needed to. No fear! Yess!

But then someone picked up, and the uneasiness set in. I had to overcome my fear of sounding stupid.

"Hello?"

"Sasuke? Hey, it's Sakura."

"Hey, Sakura. To what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Well, you might have heard... Shikamaru and I got in a huge fight."

"Yeah, I heard about that. I hope you two work it out. What about it?"

"Well, Shikamaru was kinda my date to the party... And you said that it would be better if we had a date, right?"

"Something to that effect. Well, Sakura, I think I see where this is going." He sounded pleased by something.

"Oh, really?"

"Would you like to come with me to Karin's party?"

I smiled, glad that he hadn't asked someone else. "Yes, I would love too."

"Good. I'll talk details later. Sorry about you and Shikamaru. But I guess it kinda worked out in my favor, huh? Aha, too much talking. Bye, Sakura."

"Bye, Sasuke," I said, and then I heard the line go dead.

Even through all the emptiness and anger, I felt happy. I felt pleased. Not even Shikamaru could keep me down.

I knew it was weird to feel this way. I felt accomplished, as though I was doing the world a great favor by going t this party. By trying to make Shikamaru jealous. But I knew jealousy wasn't the only reason that I was doing this. Through all the heartbreak, I saw something clearly. I really did have a crush on Sasuke. And I got him! I was victorious!

I couldn't help but get excited. I was going to a party with Sasuke!

**A/N: I hope you're not angry with the recent turn of events! Trust me, this stuff will be beneficial for Shikamaru and Sakura in the long run. If you really must know, I'm just as angry about Sasuke/Sakura as you are. I adore ShikaSaku! And you never know, maybe this Sasuke/Sakura thing won't last long. Who knows except me, right? And whoever reads these long ramblings of mine called authors notes. Anyone? Anyone? Well, thanks for reading! LEAVE COMMENTS.**

**Rai**


	4. Into the Night

**A/N: Hey ya'll. It's been like 4 days, but I couldn't wait. There were only 86 hits for my last chapter (;-; Crycry) but I guess I'll deal. There were some loyal reviewers, so I'll give you guys a nice update. This is time skipped a little bit, but I'm sure you'll love it. Here's DJ Rai, coming at you with a new chapter. Here we go!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, or Check Yes Juliet. Naruto, Kishimoto. CYJ, We The Kings. I encourage you to listen to it if you haven't heard it before.**

I checked myself out in the mirror once more. I had to say, I was looking pretty smokin'. Well, not really.

My short pink hair was pulled up into a ponytail, my bangs shadowing the sides of my face. Across the top of my head, a black headband was strategically placed. I used the only black sleeveless top I had, the collar going halfway up my neck, and then v-necking in the front. A pair of pink jeans completed the outfit. Adorning my feet were a pair of black flats, with a small pink bow where the shoe ended and my foot began.

I smiled, ready for the date with Sasuke. And ready to make Shikamaru jealous. This would should him I'm not clingy. This would show him I'm not desperate.

I don't need him.

"Sakura, darling, your date just pulled up. Where is it you say you're going again?" I did a quick check once again, and then ran downstairs. I almost tripped in my haste to be downstairs before Sasuke got there, ready to run out the door once he rang the doorbell. I was so excited about this that I could hardly breathe. My first real party as a sophomore. And all this happened because I stopped hanging out with Shikamaru. I silently prayed to God that he wouldn't be there, even though I knew he would be. My mother gave me a quick look over once I reached the bottom of the stairs, and was about to say something about my rather shocking look. I cut her off before any words could exit her mouth.

"It's just a party at a friends house. Nothing big." I shot her a smile, watching Sasuke make his way to the door. He had on black baggy jeans and a blue t-shirt. Suddenly, I felt over dressed for this type of occasion, and wanted to run upstairs and change. I tried to reassure myself that it wasn't too much, and I was relieved that I wore the jeans instead of the miniskirt I could have worn. He looked as nervous as I felt.

"And what if there is alcohol there?" She got a hard, suspicious look in her eyes, accusing me of something I had not had the chance to even do yet.

"I'll turn it down. You know how underage drinking disgusts me," I responded coolly, watching him walk up the stairs. Three, two, one... Ding dong I walked over to answer the door, smiling sweetly. "Hey, Sasuke," I said as he left out a small breath. He must have been holding it in, hoping it wasn't my father who answered the door. Frankly, my father could be very scary when he felt he needed to be.

"Hey, Sakura. Ready to go?" He gave a small smile, and looked me over. I felt happy when he didn't make a face of disgust. He's probably been to a thousand of these things before, and they were most likely old news to him. I was just a newbie at parties, but he was experienced. My awe of him increased tenfold at that moment.

"Yeah, I'm ready. See ya later, mom!" We had already worked out the schedule for my leaving and getting home. We would arrive at the party 15 minutes late, and then leave at about 10:30. I had wanted to stay longer, but my parents scared Sasuke into agreeing with them that I needed to be home by 11. So I only had three hours of fun partying time. And apparently, the party never starts until 9:30 or 10, so I'd only get about an hour of real fun. Parents could be so aggravating sometimes, am I right?

The walk to the car was fairly short, but it felt like a million years of pure silence. It was awkward yet amazing both at the same time. I felt as though I should be saying everything, yet nothing at all. Okay, that was a little cheesy, I have to admit. But I'm nervous, so give me a break here! We climbed into his car, and we took off. It was a fun ride, filled with conversation and music listening.

"Sakura, why'd you change it? I happen to like that song."

"Because, Sasuke, the music you listen to is crap. You'd be more suited to rock and roll or rap, not country."

"I grew up listening to country, thank you."

"Well then, you grew up wrong." I flashed him a smile, and he had to laugh about that one as I flipped the station yet again to find something more pleasing to the ear than country. "You really need some new music, though," I said, my voice becoming serious. He just rolled his eyes and kept driving, listening to whatever I put on.

"You know that I don't really care what we're listening to, right?"

"Yeah, but it's nice to pretend you do."

The car slowed as we came to a stoplight. The conversation died for a moment, letting the music fill our ears. We rode for a good 5 minutes like this, maybe even more. "You look really pretty tonight, Sakura," Sasuke said, breaking the silence.

"T-thanks," I stammered as we pulled to a stop on the street of a house surrounded in cars. He just chuckled at my surprisedness, and then got out of the car. He looked like he was going to come around and open the door, but I got out too quickly for him to be able to pull a stunt like that. There were others arriving, and tons already here, do it wasn't as if we were total losers. And a lot of the girls were dressed a whole lot more slutty than I was, so I immediately felt safe. No one was going to rape me tonight- Whoops, did that slip out? We trudged up the hill to the house, where there was a sign that said 'JUST COME IN' in bold letters. That could be a bad thing.

If the house looked big on the outside, it was nothing to how big it felt on the inside. There were a ton of people here, and yet it felt as if I had my own personal 10 foot bubble. This party was definitely thrown by one of the more 'well-off' in our school, but they weren't so stuck up as to leave anyone out of the inviting. I guess that was Karin for you. Everyone was here. Suddenly, I didn't feel as special as I had when I was invited. This was probably the first big party for a lot of geeks and nerds. Oh, yay. They were probably taking pity on me, and I was just someone they wold laugh about later on!

"Sakura, are you going to stand in the foyer all night looking like a lost puppy or are you going to come with me to find Karin? If I introduce you two now, she'll love you. Any later, and she'll be too drunk to remember the color of your hair." The word drunk rang in my head like an annoying ring tone or alarm clock. I wasn't kidding with my mother when I said that underage drinking disgusted me. People my age were so stupid around alcohol. But of course, I was going to have to hide this disgust for the most part. I knew Sasuke didn't drink much, if at all, so it was all good.

"Alright, lets go find Karin," I said, moving closer to him, and avoiding all the people in the way. It would figure that Karin would own a house like this. She was one of the more popular girls in school, hanging out with everyone, but only really remembering the best. I had never met her personally, as she was a grade higher than me, but I had heard a lot about her. And if I was with Sasuke, she would have to like me. They were such good friends, after all. We maneuvered through the crowd at lightning speed, Sasuke searching the crown for any sign of the girl. 'You can't miss her,' he said to me. 'She has hair like yours.' Finally, I heard someone call Sasuke's name, and he spun around, only to be face to face with what I guessed was Karin. I'd never really seen her before, but I knew who she was. She looked different from the small passing glances I had gotten of her. But then again, all I saw was the back of her head. Her hair was pink, too. She changed it alot.

"Hey, Karin! This is Sakura, my date. I told you that you weren't the only one with pink hair around here." She laughed, and looked me over. No look of disgust from her, either. But then again, she could be crafty and be hiding it.

"Aha, I guess I can't be unique in my mind. But I must say, you pull off the pink look better than I do. Yours is natural, so that might be why. Maybe I'll have to stop dying my hair, or at least try a different color. What do you think about orange hair?" she questioned jokingly. I laughed in response, and Sasuke spoke back.

"Orange hair would be a little too tame for you, Karin. I say you dye it multiple colors this time," he told her, with the other girl nodding vigorously the entire time. She looked interested in what he had to say, which surprised me. Who would want multiple colors, anyway? That would be a little odd.

"I guess you're right, Sasuke," Karin said, laughing a little bit. She looked at me once again, and then smiled. "Well, Sasuke, I think I'm going to take Sakura here on a little tour. I like her. Suigetsu and Naruto are back that way, if you want to go say hi to them. If you don't, then you're SOL, because you can't come with us." He rolled his eyes, and then moved toward the white haired boy with the fake looking teeth and Naruto. Karin turned toward me once again. "You and I have some people to meet and greet."

I had to admit, I was surprised that Karin took on to me so fast. I hadn't ever spoken to her in my life before now. In fact, I hadn't really said anything to her. And now I was her favorite little sophomore. She grabbed a hold of my arm, and started pulling me though the crowd. "Being Sasuke's girlfriend, you have to know all these people," she said, gesturing toward the masses. I opened my mouth to object; we weren't going out, we were just coming here together. But it seemed like a wasted fight, and so I just let it pass. "So, Sakura, what do you like to do?" She paused, and I was about to answer, when she brought a finger to her lips. "Hold on that answer, I just spotted someone who you have to meet." She was motioning to a rather tough looking blonde, with four pigtails and an emblem of an open fan on her shirt. "First, a little background. That's Temari; she's tough. She could kick almost anyone's ass that she needs to, or her friends need her too. She's good to have on your side in case of a drama war. Not only is she the brawn, she's got a pretty decent head on her shoulders. Used to hate her, until we both came to the realization that there was no reason to hate when we could use our powers for good. Her ex, Neji, was the only one that could keep her in line, but now that he's after Tenten, she's made a hate club for the poor girl. Tenten can hold her own, though." Once again, Karin pulled me forward, and waved to Temari.

"Hey, girl! I want you to meet someone! This is Sakura, Sasuke's girlfriend. I know, isn't she adorable? I'll leave you two to talk for a bit, but then I must collect my little sophomore to go around once again." Karin made wave goodbye, and moved away fast to go talk to a white eyed Hyuuga that wasn't Neji or Hinata. Must have been a cousin or something.

Temari glanced me over, and then smiled. "You're Sasuke's new girl, huh? He must really like you to bring you here to meet Karin. She went stalker crazy on him a while back, and he couldn't talk to another girl for months. She's taken a liking to you, though, which means she's moved on. Hi, I'm Temari, and I'm so sorry that Karin's bothering you so much."

I tried to smile, but it probably looked a little forced. "And I'm Sakura. It's fine, I kinda like getting to know people, and Karin seems to know a lot of them."

"Yeah, she likes being the center of everything. If anything ever happens between you and someone else, she probably knows so much dirt on them that you're set for life." I had to let a small chuckle out. Later, I'd have to see if Karin knew anything on Shikamaru. Speaking of the spiky haired dumbass, where was he? I hadn't seen him all night, not that I had been looking.

"Oh, no, time is up, you two!" An arm came out and pulled me away as I waved to Temari. I liked her, and I didn't want to get on her bad side. But I also liked Tenten, so... Ahh, this world of people and drama was much too confusing. She introduced me to a whole new set of people, who each took their turns to make jokes about Karin and apologize to me for Karin's craziness. I just smiled, and told them it was fine. We moved through crowds like water, but I figured that's what the hostess of a huge party had to do. Why I was being dragged along, I had no idea."Ohhh, there's Kiba. Cute, but not really my type, if ya know what I mean. He's a real player. Arrogant, too." I had to agree with that 100. "His friend Shino is the quite mysterious type, though. Maybe if he let us see his eyes, and wore less baggy clothes, he'd have girls hanging all over him." I frowned slightly, not having thought of Shino as a ladies man until that statement. The two did not mix well in my mind. "And there's Tenten, but you said you already know her. Might as well say hi while she's here with Neji and Lee. You said you hadn't met Lee, right? Oi, LEE!" A guy with black hair and a green top turned to look at her. He had some creepy eyebrows, but otherwise looked more normal than the kids with the Mohawks and piercings all over the place.

"Yes, Karin? Do you require anything from me?" The first thing I noticed after his looks was his peculiar speech.

"Hey, Sakura, hey Karin," Tenten said, waving to us. The group moved over toward us, Lee and Tenten talking with Karin while Neji sulked and stared off into the distance. Suddenly, it struck me odd that Karin was talking to Tenten, especially if Temari hated her. But then again, Karin seemed like the type not to choose sides, just disperse information. "She said what? Ugh, that Temari is such a liar! And all for nothing, too. It's not my fault that Neji didn't like her anymore!" Tenten went off on a little rant that only Neji listened too, and Karin introduced me to Lee.

"Lee, this is Sakura," Karin said carefully. "Sasuke's girlfriend."

"Ah, Sakura. What a fitting name for such a beautiful cherry blossom such as yourself. And your hair is the perfect shade of pink... Your parents named you well." Lee moved closer to me, getting a rather strange fire look in his eye.

"Sasuke's girlfriend," Karin repeated with renewed intensity. Lee backed away, but didn't stop looking at me with that look. I started to feel uncomfortable as Tenten and Karin got to talking once again, leaving me to move closer to Neji.

"Hey, Neji..." I said, trying to avoid Lee's eyes.

"Hn," he responded.

"Having fun?" I asked, desperate to make conversation.

"Hn," he said, with a slight nod. That must mean yes. Or he's really deep in thought. Or he hates me. One of the three.

"Right. So... How's life?" I asked nervously, wishing I hadn't tried to start this conversation.

"Decent," he responded, sending a shock wave through out my body. He talks? In more than Hns? It was an amazing discovery, I tell you. One for the record books. He looked at me, and then cleared his throat. "How is... Uchiha?" It sounded rather forced, as though he was also trying to make the strange awkwardness die a little bit.

"Uchiha is fine, Neji. And I'd appreciate it if you stopped freaking my girl out, Lee." Sasuke's voice was suddenly beside me. He moved in quickly, like a ninja or something. "I know Karin said to play keep away until she was done, but it's been a good 45 minutes already and I was tired of waiting," he explained softly in my ear.

"It's okay. I think this was our last stop, anyway." I smiled up at him, glad to have a good conversationalist again. Karin glanced backwards at us, rolled her eyes, but then made a hand motion to signal that we could leave if we wanted to. "Thanks for the rescue," I stated once we moved out, away from the crowds.

"You looked exceptionally bored, and I knew that Karin would drag you all over the place, spreading gossip like wildfire. Not only that, but Lee's stare was starting to get a little strange." I nodded as we moved to a couch and sat down. "So, what did you and Karin talk about? Or rather, whom did you and Karin talk about?"

"Everyone, just about. It was crazy. I was introduced to so many new people, and they all seemed to like me. I have to say, I was surprised." I had met a lot of people that night, and the only ones who seemed to give me a hard time only did so after finding out I was Sasuke's girlfriend. Which we aren't boyfriend girlfriend, and now Karin's lie seemed so big.

"Why do you act to surprised that people like you? You're an easily likable person, Sakura, especially when you aren't trying to put yourself down to make others feel good." I blushed slightly. This was one of the reasons I liked Sasuke so much. He seemed like he was into me as a person, and not just me as an object. When we talked at lunch, it was about serious things or silly things, but we still talked. It wasn't as if all he did was stare at me and tell me how fine I looked. Not that he would, anyway, because he wasn't one to lie.

"I don't know, but it's just surprising to see what I could be if I was popular. I could know all these people, like you and Karin do. Before I really started talking to you, I was just the unknown soldier, who got a little jittery after Kiba said hi to me because I thought that he was popular. Ino was the only ticket I had to actually meeting people outside of band. Now, I know people that she would die to have talk to her. People she's already marked down as being in the 'big leagues' while she was just a minor leagues type of girl. I'm just surprised that they all see me now." I looked away from his face, halfway ashamed that I was admitting all of this to him. He probably thoguht that I was just using him to become popular, and be popular. Which was totally untrue.

"Face it, Sakura, people like you. And now that Karin likes you, you're going to find out a whole lot more than you ever wanted to. People will almost worship the ground you walk on."

"I hope not. That'd just be too weird for me." He laughed, and we settled down to talk about other things. A little bit of gossip, a little bit of politics, a little bit of likes and dislikes. Suddenly, a song came on that I knew, and I smiled as the music blared out of the speakers. Sasuke noticed my smile, and pulled me up.

"Come on, we're going to dance." I shook my head, dumbstruck, as those words came out of his mouth. He just pulled harder, and I knew I had no choice.

The music blared loudly, but I loved every second of it.

_Run baby run,_

_Don't ever look back._

_They'll tear us apart,_

_If you give them the chance._

Sasuke spun me around during the chorus, and I smiled widely. Karin has some pretty good tastes in music.

_Don't sell your heart,_

_Don't say we're not meant to be._

_Run baby run,_

_Forever will be..._

_You and me._

He let out a laugh as I tripped, about to fall before he caught me. We danced, and we were having a blast.

_Run baby run,_

_Don't ever look back._

We moved in a small circle, and I spotted a couple on the couch, making out. Ugh, how rude. Okay, not so much. But still, how could they breathe?

_They'll tear us apart,_

_If you give them the chance._

There was something unusually about that couple. The girl had the same shade of hair as Karin, yet she was wearing a hat over it. Her head was blocking the guy. I remembered her name from Karin. Tayuya... She was supposed to be a real slut, and she played dirty when it came down to things. If she liked a guy, she would cut off his connections to other girls one by one.

_Don't sell your heart,_

_Don't say we're not meant to be._

She pulled back for air, and I slowed down to try and catch a peek at the guy. Who was she kissing so intently?

_Run baby run, _

The disgust rose in my throat as I say the familiar features, and the spiky black hair in its usual ponytail.

_Forever will be..._

He looked up, as though he sensed someone was looknig at him, and saw me. I shot him a glare back.

_You and me._

He said something to her, and she looked upset, but he said something back, and she let him go. "Err, Sasuke, I'm going to have to sit this one out. Shikamaru finally wants to talk." Sasuke nodded like I knew he was. He was the one that had encouraged me after all of it happened to go after him once again, and try and be friends. I told him no way, but he pushed. Now, we were both ready to do this. Or so I thought. Sasuke turned around, and Shikamaru sent him a small glare. I found that rude and uncalled for. I felt my anger rising. First, he dares to come here with Tayuya, and second, he makes glares at my Sasuke?! Oh no he didn't. What the hell was he thinking?

"Sakura," Shikamaru said when he reached me, "lets go to a room somewhere. We need to talk." I huffed in response, and allowed myself to be lead out of the big room to some of the adjoining rooms. We had to find one that wasn't, um, 'in use'. Finally, we arrived in a couple free room, and he shut the door. Shikamaru opened his mouth to say something, but I cut him off.

"Really, Shikamaru?! The best you could get was a slut like Tayuya? I thought that even as ass like you could do better than that, but I guess some of us are more desperate than others! You KNOW that she's a walking STD. You KNOW that you're probably getting some horrible disease just kissing her! God, what is wrong with you? Has losing all that oxygen from kissing killed all of your braincells, huh?" I knew I was mad, and probably should have kept this crap to myself. But he wanted to talk to me, and a talk he would get. I was armed with Karin's knowledge, and I knew I would have a few people to back me up.

"I don't appreciate you talking about her like that," he said calmly, but I could tell that it was a mask. He was trying to calm me down by acting like he was. Typical Shikamaru.

"Yeah, well, I don't appreciate you taking me away from my date, talking shit behind my back, and being in my general presence. So you'll just have to get over it like I am doing." I crossed my arms across my chest. His eyes were turning bright with anger, and I knew I had hit a sour patch somewhere.

"I don't need to get over anything, Sakura. You're the one who believed those rumors! I thought we were BEST friends, and yet you let some little lie rip us apart? WHAT THE HELL! And then, when I try to approach you at all, you ignore me, and get your friends to cover your ass! Ino won't even let me talk about you, because she says that she can't forgive me until you do! And now you've got more of them! Karin glared a hole through me when I walked in, and told me that if she ever hears that I do something else to you, she'd make sure I wouldn't be able to show my face around school anymore. When did you even start hanging out with these people? And this was tonight, weeks after all of this happened!" He stopped to take a breath, and I cut in.

"A lie? Shikamaru, you know that that's something you'd say about someone! You like to impress your new friends, don'tcha? Well, your new friends apparently had some good buddies who like me, and they took mercy on me! Best friends, ha! We never had that much in common, anyway. All you did was complain at me, and all I had to do was listen. You got me in trouble with people I had never met before! All because you talk shit and then blame it on me. Well, I'm fed up with it. And Ino was doing a good thing, not letting you talk more shit about me. And Karin could tear you apart in one second. These are the people I am friends with now, after you alienated me from most of my friends from band. They're cool, they're popular, and they like me."

"THEY REPRESENT EVERYTHING YOU USED TO HATE! People who were fake, people who spread gossip for the fun of it, people who started drama wars! And I never said anything about you!" He was clenching his fists now. I was frightened that he might hit me, but my anger enveloped my fear.

"Frankly, Shikmaru, you don't know me at all anymore! They're awesome people, who wold tell me if you said anything! And they all hate Tayuya, too. They know what she is! They know what she's done!"

"What about Sasuke, huh? Even if he was the only one that wouldn't try and kill me for trying to talk to you, you know what he's done too, right? He's only a sophomore, and yet they all love him! I WONDER WHY!"

"TAKE THAT BACK! Sasuke would NEVER do something like that! They're old FRIENDS, all of them. Something you wouldn't know about, because you seem to push all of YOURS AWAY! My date is respectable! Yours is REJECTED because she is a fucking SLUT! Every guy who's active knows her inside and out. I bet you do, too!"

"I DO NOT! And how can you be so sure?! Tayuya and I have talked about it. We UNDERSTAND each other. She KNOWS that I'm not ready, that I want to wait, and she's FINE with it. Didja ever ask Sasuke if he was okay with any of your decisions? Or will you just take him for granted until something happens? Frankly, Sakura, I can't stand who you're becoming! This summer, you could care less about who was with who, and Sasuke and Kiba. But now, it's like that's all you think about! It's so FRUSTRATING!"

I widened my eyes in shock that he would think I'm frustrating, and then I swang back at him with a verbal jab. "You've changed, too! That's all you've done this year is become someone I don't know anymore! And you're only jealous that I'm doing so well without you! You thought that I would die without my life force to 'cling on' to. I'm not that desperate, Shikamaru! I can survive without you! And don't you DARE mention Sasuke's name like that! He's great, he's the best boyfriend ever! God, I'm so surprised that I ever thought of you as a friend! All you do is put me down!" No one had come in the room, and I guessed it was because of the racket we were making.

"SAKURA! You don't know me anymore because you don't want to care! That's only reason! And he's your first boyfriend! And, knowing him, he'll probably try something on you before you're ready! I CAN'T STAND TO SEE YOU HURT, SAKURA."

"I don't CARE if he's my first. And good news, Shikamaru! You won't have to see me hurt, because I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!" And with that, I stormed out of the room, my dark aura making the lovey couples move out of my wake. I needed to find Sasuke, and leave. I couldn't stand to be in the same proximity as him. Damn the fact that we live so close. Like a magnet, Sasuke came up from the shadows of the party. He looked at me, and then behind me. I guessed that he spotted Shikamaru just as angry, if not more, as I was. He looked at me once again, and then nodded. He was taking me home.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Shikamaru talking to STD girl, and then pulling keys out of his pocket. That's right, he could drive now. He gave her one last goodbye kiss, and I felt like exploding with anger. Sasuke pulled my close and maneuvered us out of the room. Karin waved goodbye, and glared at soemone behind me, which I hoped was Shikamaru. He deserved it. Sasuke led me to the car, and then opened my door for me as I got in. Being in his presence was calming me considerably, and I was starting to think that I should have been easier on Shikamaru. Part of me said no, but part of me said yes.

The ride home was quiet, and when Sasuke tried to talk, all I did was start to cry and pour out all that had happened. With one hand on the wheel, he gave me a quick hug. We were on a two lane street, and the car coming from the opposite direction was going too fast and was kind of swerving. Either they were drunk or emotional, like I was. It was a good thing I had Sasuke here. The car swerved into our lane, but Sasuke shifted the car, and they didn't collide. I was shaking with anger mixed wth pure sorrow. It didn't even occur to me to feel scared when the car swerved. I just felt so safe with Sasuke.

There was no way he'd ever try anything on me.

We rode home in silence after my out burst, Sasuke realizing that talking would only make me more upset. He let me out of the car, and led me up to the front steps. My parents were already in bed, so it must have been close to 10:30. They apparently trusted Sasuke enough to get me home on time. Even my parents trusted Sasuke, so he couldn't have been too bad. He wasn't. Shikamaru was out of his mind to suggest something as ludicrous as Sasuke sleeping around. Ugh, I HATE Shikamaru.

Suddenly, before I went inside, I felt a hand on my arm. I turned to face the owner of said hand, and noticed that Sasuke's face was close to mine."Sakura..." he whispered, and leaned in for a goodnight kiss. I, in all of my shocked glory, didn't even try to stop him. Even though he wasn't here, I could feel the kiss making Shikamaru mad, and I enjoyed it. My eyes closed, and I have to say that the kiss felt good. I was swept up into it like a princess in a fairytale, and it all ended too soon. "Well, goodnight," he said, being slightly out of breath himself. I just nodded, and slipped into the house, locking the door behind me.

I was happily waltzing up the stairs, preparing for a good nights rest. I was tired, emotionally spent, and I needed it. A faint buzzing drummed against my thigh, and I suddenly remembered that my cell was in there. Who would be calling this late? I stopped on the third stair, and took it out of my pocket. "Mrs. Nara?" I asked quietly, looking at the phone. What was she calling for? Had Shikamaru not gotten home? Had he told her? "H-Hello?"

"Sakura, honey... I have some bad news." She was trying not to break into sobs on the phone, I could tell. But why?

"What's wrong, Mrs. Nara?" I asked, my voice filling with unknowing fear.

"It's Shikamaru. He's in the emergency room. He was in a car crash. He's in pretty bad condition... My baby..." Sobs were heard, but no one came to the phone. She was alone.

"What are they saying? And don't worry Mrs. Nara, I'll be there in a second." There was only one hospital close to our house, and I could get ther pretty quickly. I knew that I could just get over there without waking my parents up. I wasn't thinking clearly, but that didn't stop me.

"Thank you. And... well, they won't be straight with me. But one thing is for sure... He's not okay."

**A/N: Gosh, I just love leaving you guys off with a cliff hanger. REVIEW FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER, GOT IT? And more than 86 hits, please. That's just saddening. Thank you for reading my story! And I know it's weird that Mrs. Nara would call Sakura, but she thinks that Sakura will know what happened, like why her son got in a wreck. That miiiiight be important. OH YEAH. Sorry if I spelled anything wrong, but I checked it with my little speller, and I don't have a beta, so you get to deal. :D  
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	5. There's No Comfort

**A/N: C-C-Coming at ya with something fresh off the press. Watch out, you just might get ink on your fingers. And we can't have that, now can we? New Update, I, Sakura, enjoy, enjoy. This is star reporter, Rai Lockhart, reporting on the most important event in recent history. Please, feel free to review.**

Sitting in the waiting room has got to be the worst feeling in the world. I was shaking all over my body, staring at my shoes with a renewed intensity. They were the same black flats I had worn to the party tonight, as I hadn't had time to change since then.

I couldn't meet her eyes. She, the one who had called me, was doing everything in her power to see her son's status. Was he okay? Was he hurt? Would he... wake up? She was nervously standing by the door, jumping slightly at every noise, at every footstep heard behind the door. A doctor would come out, and she would brighten, ever so slightly, but he would just move on to another group of people, waiting for the bad news. The nurses would tell her just to wait, that she'd be the first allowed into his room when he was ready. She said she wanted to se him right now. Now, she screamed. Mrs. Nara had tears in her eyes, and I couldn't help think that they were because of me. I did this.

It was my fault that he was in there, my fault that he might never wake up, my fault she had to stand there, waiting, knowing, and yet hoping for something else. I made him angry. I got him upset. We could have worked it out. I could have not said anything. I could have ignored him, ignore it. And... Maybe... he would still be here... with me, with us, with her. Tears welled up in my already puffy eyes, and the tears flowed down my already wet cheeks.

Me, all me. No one else. It wasn't even his fault! God damn, I hate me so much right now. I bet she does, too. I know she does. I was shaking uncontrollably, breaths coming in short, strained sounds.

But what the hell was he thinking, getting into a wreck like that? Huh? Why would he go and do something like that? Couldn't he... couldn't get have just let me live on? We would have gotten over it eventually. But now... He could die? What in the world was he thinking?

"Sakura..." A deep, familiar voice jerked me out of this self-hatred I had started since coming here. I looked up, slightly surprised, and saw Mr. Nara looking down at me. He was here; of course he was here. He hadn't been there at the start, because of work, but no, he was here now. "Sakura, kiddo..." It was like a twisted, sick joke, hearing him use Shikamaru's nickname for me. I looked up at him, lip trembling and body shaking. I felt sick to my stomach as I met his eyes. I felt like I could blow at any moment. Maybe if I died, he'd be there, and we would be together.

"Honey, leave her alone for now, okay?" He understood; don't ask the crying girl questions about why he might have wrecked. They both knew that he went to the party. And he wasn't the type to drive erratically unless he was angry. So I should know why he was angry... Yeah, I should know. Me. I was the reason.

I started trebling again, knowing that eventually they would ask, and eventually they would find out that I had caused the wreck. It was me! All me! I HATE ME! More voices filled the waiting room as family arrived. They were bound to come, of course. They needed to be here, too. They needed to be here when... when... A shiver fell over me once again.

"Sakura, honey," my fathers voice was suddenly beside me. "It'll all be okay, he'll be fine." My father had been here the entire time, as he was the one who had taken me here. Luckily for me, he was ready to go, reading a book in bed, awaiting my return.

"No, daddy, it won't be fine." Tears erupted again. He put his arm around my shoulder, and squeezed. More voices echoed in the room. There were at least 10 people here now for Shikamaru. His parents, grandparents, Chouji, my parents, me. I took note that she wasn't here. His parents probably wouldn't know to call her, probably didn't know that she was his date tonight. Why should they know? No one else knew about his date with her. She was part of the reason. so I wasn't all to blame.

Who am I kidding? Of course I am! Me, all me. Shikamaru's in a coma, because of my. He was in an accident because of, you guessed it, me. He was hurt, badly, because of me. And my stupid, loud, fat, ugly mouth. And Kiba. Kiba was to blame, too. But mostly me. I must have looked in pain, because my father started petting my head.

I checked the clock hanging above the doors. Mrs. Nara's parents were talking to her, trying to get her to calm down. Not on their life, she screamed, not when it was her son, her baby... I glanced up as my mother moved over to her, and whispered something in her ear. Mrs. Nara nodded, looking relieved. Slightly. I figured my mother was going to go in there and check; she had clearance, she worked here. Of course. But Mrs. Nara wasn't entirely happy. Her friend would see her son before her. How unfair.

My mom moved through the doors, being stopped by a new nurse who soon left her alone after she showed her badge. I looked down again. My fathers grip tightened.

I should have believed him. Looking back, it seemed like a petty thing to argue about. Something Kiba told me? What was I thinking? Well, I can tell you what, I wasn't thinking. And now there might never be a chance to apologize. For all I know, he could be bleeding to death. I felt sick once again, thinking of my best friend, well, ex-best friend, bleeding to death. It was kind of funny in a way. This was all my fault. Haha. I was starting to go hysterical. Ha. Crazy girl with the dead friend!

I grabbed my fathers hand, and squeezed as hard as I could. He hugged me tighter with the arm around me, and I just let the salty tears hit the ground. What was I thinking? How could I have yelled? There was so much left unsaid... I told him I never wanted to see him again! I didn't mean it, I really didn't.

And then, I did something I hadn't done in a long time. I clenched my eyes together, and began to mumble a prayer under my breath. I wasn't one for much religion; I had seen too many people in the hospital to believe that someone could let this happen. If someone really was protecting us, then why would they want to see us suffer? Especially like this. Tormenting so many people. But if there was ever a time to be proven wrong, it was now. Come on, deity. Tell me I'm wrong...

Let him live. Please, oh God, oh someone, let him live.

I leaned into my father completely, and his grip on me increased tenfold. I just frowned. "This is all my fault, this is all my fault..." I murmured under my breath. There was no way it could be otherwise. I just knew it.

"Shhhhh, it's not. It's okay." My father rocked me a little bit.

I could see every little fantasy I had had about Shikamaru and I flash before my eyes. It was then that I realized that all the plans we had made when we were younger, even the crazy ones, were little prayers in their own right. When you make a plan with someone, you don't expect someone to go and die on you... They were tiny prayers to Father Time, these plans. And now they were all ruined.

My mother had still not returned.

The worst part about having a mother who worked in the hospital was knowing that most people in the waiting room don't get what they want. Most doctors only come here to have someone break down crying. There's no comfort in the waiting room... All there was were nervous people, waiting for the bad news to come and hit. That's all that the doctors brought, except on rare occasions. I really, really hoped this was a rare occasion.

The TV in the corner kept playing on as if nothing was going on, as if the world was perfect and Shikamaru wasn't possibly dying.

After being gone for a good ten minutes, I looked through the waiting room doors that connected to the wards, and saw her. She didn't look optimistic. Shit, no. Slowly, she moved trough the doors, and a tear drenched Mrs. Nara ran to her. My mother, being the compassionate woman she was, gave the other mother a hug, and whispered something in her ear. Mrs. Nara shook her head, and beckoned to her husband. My mother took them both through the doors, not saying a word to anyone else.

My nerves were shot by that time. I had no idea what was going on. Were they going to see the dead body? Was he about to die?

Was he... okay?

I breathed deeply, and tried to calm myself. I turned away from the doors, hoping not to see my mother come back. If it was good news, she'd call for me. Soon, one set of grandparents went through the door, followed a few minutes later by another. I tried not to think about the fact that no one was saying anything. To take my mind off of the situation at hand, I glanced over to Chouji. He forced a weak smile, and I removed my father's hand to go see him. Chouji and I never really talked; he was more of Shikamaru's friend than my friend. We had known each other for so long, yet we just kind of waved and moved on.

"Hey, Chouji," I spoke in a low, strangled, scratchy voice. I probably looked like I had been bawling my eyes out, which was completely true.

He nodded, as if to acknowledge me while he tried to get his voice together. "Hiya, Sakura," he said, his voice strange sounding because of the 'problem.' We sat in silence for a second, awkwardly staring around at the walls. Chouji cleared his throat, obviously trying to think of a good subject. "So... It's odd for Shikamaru to get in a wreck, huh?"

"Yeah..." I agreed, a little too quickly and pushily.

"I wonder what happened to make him do that. He's usually so careful." Even though his tone didn't sound accusatory, I took it that way. I had to tell someone, I just had to.

"It w-w-w-was me. I did it. S-Shikamaru and I got in this fight at K-K-Karin's party and h-he left and I l-l-left and there was a driver who was sw-sw-swerving and Sasuke d-dodged and I guess Shikamaru didn't but it's my fault. All my fault. If he h-hadn't ben so angry at me, he could have driven better!" I was speaking so fast and quietly, it was a miracle that Chouji heard me.

He just frowned. "Sakura, it wasn't your fault. You said there was a driver, who was most likely drunk. It was that guys fault." I hated that fact that he was trying to console me. I hated it. It was my fault!

"How can you say that? You have no idea... No idea. It was me. God damnit, it was me. I did this to him! I'm a bad person! A bad friend! A bad person! I let him down, I broke Mrs. Nara's heart... And now he could be dead!"

I shouldn't have believed the rumor in the first place. I shouldn't have been so dense as to let it get in the way of a friendship. I should have heard Shikamaru out. I should have gone with him o the party, and left with him. I should have saved him. I shouldn't have doubted him. I shouldn't have yelled at him, nor told him I hated him. It was me, all me. I ruined our friendship. I killed my best friend. I believed a rumor, got caught up in drama, didn't listen to the only voice of reason I had anymore, my one constant in an entire changing world.

I could feel the sea of doubt that had grown inside of me for Shikamaru shrink. The small pebble of hope I had clung to when I was so blind was growing back into the solid mountain that was our friendship. I was to blame. It was me, all my damn fault. I hated myself even more.

"Chouji, how could I have been so blind?" I asked, breaking down once again.

"We all have to have our doubts at one time or another. If you didn't doubt him, your friendship could never grow nor become stronger. He'll forgive you for believing those people, you know that. All that's left is for what you two have to grow to become stronger, more durable, and even better than before."

I stopped crying to look at Chouji. That was one this that I was always hocked about; he was very good at looking at the world in a way that no one else could. He had wisdom about these things, and it was amazing. "You.. you really think he'll forgive me for the hell I've put him through?"

"Yes, Sakura. Don't be stupid. He'd forgive you in a heartbeat." I had to smile at that. Yeah, I guess he would...

"Chouji... Shikamaru wants to see you." I grimaced at the fact that my name was no where to be mentioned. His grandfather was in the waiting room now, the other three grandparents not far behind. Chouji stood up, and started heading toward the door.

He turned back hesitantly, looking over his shoulder at me. "Are you coming?"

"He doesn't want to see me," I said sadly.

"No, he just doesn't know you want to see him." The last words I said to him flashed into my mind like a bad record. '_I never want to see you again...'_ I got up slowly, and followed Chouji and Mr. NAra's father to the roo mwhere Shikamaru was. My mother was outside, leaning against the window, and Mrs. NAra was coming out of it, her husband pulling her along.

"He's okay. I can't believe it. He's hurt, but he's alive..." She was saying to her self. Mr. Nara was trying to coax her into geting something to drink, realizing that Shikamaru wasnted to be alone with his friend. Chouji held the door for a fraction of a second, looking at me. I shook my head, too afraid to go in. He nodded, and went in alone.

The door shut. "Sakura, darling, it's okay to be afraid." I looked over at the older woman leaning on the door frame. "I was the one who was there when Shikamaru woke up. He was a little groggy, and seemed to mistake me for you. He apologized to me, telling me that he didn't mean what he said about someone... I couldn't catch the name. I don't think he's angry at you." I ignored her and looked through the window, trying to keep myself out of view from Shikamaru. I could see him smile weakly at something Chouji had told him. Chouji smiled, more than he had when he was with me, and glanced backward. I dodged out of sight as Shikamaru glanced my way, too.

What game was Chouji playing, looking at me like that? I wasn't supposed to even be here, he didn't ask for me, I was invisible. I peeked back in relieved to see Chouji taking up all of Shikamaru's attentions. From what I could see of the boy lying in the bed, he was hurt pretty badly.

"Mom," I asked softly, "What did happen to Shikamaru?"

"He got in a car wreck. A drunk driver was going the opposite way, and he crashed into Shikamaru's car. Shikamaru said that he saw the car in front of him swerve, and he got nervous. Understandable." I kept a neutral face, but inside, I was itching with curiosity. Was he nervous because he car swerved or because he thought that someone in the car was being attacked? Was he thinking about me?

Agg, I really did cause the wreck, didn't I? Suddenly, when I was drown in my own thoughts, Chouji stood up. I watched him without taking it in. Subconsciously, or by my mother, I have no idea, I stepped backwards, dodging from view. A gentle voice came out from behind me. "Hey, Sakura..."

Before I knew it, Chouji had grabbed my arm and was dragging me into the hospital room. I was fighting for my life here, and I was reaching out for my mother. I didn't want to go in. He hated me. I know he did. My mother made no move to help me; she just watched Chouji lead me into my sure doom. Nyah, I hate that Chouji is so strong!

But as son as I heard, "Hi..." in that nervous, lazy draw, I stopped struggling and turned to look at Shikamaru. He was smiling weakly, and Chouji moved me to the chair that was next to the bed. The one that he was using.

"But where will you sit?" I wondered as he forced me downward.

"Out in the waiting room. I've had my time with him. I's your turn. Besides... I need to make a phone call to get home so I can sleep."

My mother spoke from out of sight. "We can give you a ride home, Chouji." The Akimichi smiled, and exited the room, shutting the door behind him. He was leaving me in the room with the guy who probably hated my guts, despite what show he put on for his real best friend, the one who wouldn't let a rumor get between them.

"Sakura, I have something to tell you..." My thoughts were interrupted by his voice.

I cut in quickly. "I'm sorry."

He looked taken aback, shock filling his features. "W-What?"

"I'm so sorry. I've had a lot of time to think this over... Well, not a lot, but there's not much to do out there besides cry, pace, and read magazines that are like a bazillion years old. Anyway, I was thinking. I've been stupid, a complete idiot. How in the world could I believe Kiba? Of all the people in the work to believe... God, I've been such an idiot." I was crying.

"Yeah, well..." Shikamaru looked at me, that same spark in his eye, and laughed a little. I had to smile, but I wasn't done. He was trying to get me to stop crying, I knew that.

"I'm just so sorry. I shouldn't have insulted Tayuya. I mean, you like he so much, obviously. I forced you into the wreck. It's my fault you're here... If I hadn't been so blind! If I had actually thought things through, I could have done so much more. I could have rectified the situation. I could have ignored it. I could have actually listened..." I was crying to hard right now.

Shikamaru looked off to the side a little bit. "I never really liked Tayuya... I mean, I did, for a while. But something kept nagging me at the back of my mind, and that's what I wanted--" My voice interrupted his own.

"And then Sasuke tried to tell me that it was wrong of me to believe rumors. And I know I should have been more worried about you, I mean, I fricken' pissed you off so badly with all that crap I said! But after the kiss with Sasuke, nothing was entering my mind--"

"K-Kiss?" Shikamaru stammered. I didn't see it at all, but he winced, as though in pain. Well, more than phsycial pain.

"Yes, kiss. Sasuke and I go out now, I think. Oh, who cares? God, I'm so, so, so sorry."

"Yeah, I'm sorry too. That stuff I said about Sasuke... I was just angry. Forgive me?"

I smiled. "Yeah. Forgive me?"

"A thousand times over." My tears were starting to dry; either that or I was running out of water in my body. I know, I know, it's impossible. But I was so relieved to hear him say that. We were friends again. Better than ever. Right?

I paused for a second, concentrating back on my friend. "You said you had something to tell me?"

He voice returned to it's normal lazy draw. "I was going to apologize for the crap I said about Sasuke and tell you to forget about the stuff that Kiba said. But you got over Kiba's crap yourself and I already did the Sasuke thing. And we're good." He stopped again, and looked at me," We are good, right?"

"We're great. I messed up, not you."

"I didn't help the situation..."

We both stopped for an awkward silence. "So..." I said, attempting conversation. "Hurt... much?"

"Yeah, the bruises and blood kinda make for a painful night. They say that a few of my ribs are broken, and a couple of bones in my arm. Apparently, I could have had brain trauma if I hadn't woken up." He leaned his head back and closed his eyes. I hated seeing him here, in a bed, covered in bandages.

"Must have sucked. That car came close to hitting us, too. Sasuke dodged it, though."

"He's a good driver. I got nervous following you, though. I saw him swerve up ahead and thought he was drunk or something."

"Aha, sure sure. But you are feeling okay, right?"

"Yeah. The doctors were afraid that I was going to be in a coma. Your mom sure has a healers touch, though. They said she walked in, leaned toward me, and said something in my ear. Then I woke up." He turned his head, and looked away. I saw the rest in my mind; him apologizing, my mother saying something. He just didn't want to admit it.

I smiled. "Ah, yeah. It only sucks when you're trying to get out of a test or something, you know?"

I could hear someone coming. My mother opened the door, and said, "Mrs. Nara is coming back. You two need to hurry it up so she can spend the time with her son, mmkay?" I nodded, and looked back at him.

We stared at each other for a minute, and then I did something completely... Well.. Expected. I leaned in, and gave him a hug. He tightened under my light grip, probably because it hurt like hell, but he didn't pull away. "Try not to get into an more wrecks, okay?" I said, tears coming back.

He wrapped his arms around me with a small "Ouch." I tried not to gasp as the familiar feelings of attraction warmed the pit of my stomach. Just friends, right? Sasuke, right? Right... When I went to pull away, he smiled lazily. "I'll try not to, not that my mother will ever let me drive again. Nyah, that troublesome woman won't ever let me near a car she's not in." I just grinned, and moved toward the door.

Mrs. Nara came in, and I stopped at the door to offer a little wave to Shikamaru. He nodded to me, and then turned his attention to his mother.

"How are you feeling?" My own mother asked as I stepped out and shut the door.

"Better. Much, much better." I smiled, knowing that he was okay. I was going to have to thank which ever god was responsible for this. They saved him. We were friends. He was alive. That last one really set my heart free. He's alive.

Chouji was standing in the cafeteria when I went in there to look for something to eat. I hadn't had a real dinner, and this whole thing really killed my appetite. He looked at me. "Is all as it's supposed to be?"

"Yeah," I said, my throat scratchy. He grinned.

"I figured you two would get over this ugly drama thing."

"Hey, having a good friend in the hospital can do wonders for a friendship, ya know?" He handed me some kind of liquid, and something to eat. I ate it without thinking.

"You look really tired, Sakura. Emotionally spent."

I sat in a chair, soon to be followed by Chouji. I placed my elbows on the table, and put my head in my hands. "You have no idea. I feel like I've lived a thousand years in two seconds. It's amazing. I've gotten angry, fallen in love, cried my eyes out, relaxed, resolved my problems, got accepted into a crowd I once hated, and solved world hunger. Okay, maybe no hunger, but I did go to my first party tonight."

"What happened at that party? It must have been something between you and Shikamaru; there's no way he would have gotten so angry over anyone else."

I bit my lip, and removed my head from my hands to look at the slightly overweight teen. "We got in a huge fight over Tayuya and Sasuke. Some crap was said. I told him I never wanted to see him again. I told you that I fucked this whole thing up. It was mostly my fault that this whole thing started. You were the one that didn't believe me." Chouji just shook his head.

"Yeah, I guess you're right. I should have listened to you."

"It takes time to learn these things. Don't be angry if you don't get it right off the bat. It takes most people at least two weeks to get annoyed with me."

He was an alright guy, that Chouji. We never talked, because, well, I never really saw him as a me friend. He was a Shikamaru friend, like Hinata was my friend and not Shikamaru's. "You know, this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship, Haruno."

"Either that, or we're so tired we'll forget this conversation ever took place." I smiled, despite myself. "But if it does lead to friendship, it'll be one I'm glad happened." He nodded. "And if you're really good, I'll even share my best friend with you." He laughed.

It was a nice laugh. Gah, I'm tired. "You're a very funny girl, Sakura."

"Nah. I'm just really tired. Trust me, I tone it down when I'm better rested. Not as funny, but it's more or less the real me then." This was truth. At sleepovers, the girls like to keep me awake so I'll make jokes for them. People say I'm more enjoyable when I'm on the brink of sleep deprivation.

"Well, hey. How about we get your parents to take us home? I'm kinda dead, as well." I nodded, and we went back to the waiting room, where both my parents stood. My mother smiled, and look at Chouji.

"I'll take you home, Chouji. Sakura, you and your father are going to take his car back." And with that, everyone left, ready to go back to their lives. I waved to Chouji, and got in the car.

My father started it up, and we were on the way home. "You're better now, I hear."

"Yeah," I said sleepily. "Much better..."

I must have fallen asleep in the car. I can't really remember what else happened that night, but not much.

Shikamaru and I were friends again.

All was right with my world.

**A/N: So, are you guys happy? Shikamaru's alive, all is right with the world, and SasuSaku is abundant. Well, not in this chapter, but still. It might be abundant later. I've got another good twist planned out. Oh wait... You don't want to know the details. I hope you enjoy, and review, please? And check out the one shot I wrote. It's crappy, but I like it. Okay, okay, no more shameless plugs. Sorry that this chapter seems kinda choppy and pieced together, but I was in a lot of different moods while writing it. I'm glad it's done, though. I like this one. Based slightly on What Sarah Said by Death Cab for Cutie. Don't own Naruto, nor song, but I do own idea, I believe. OH! And don't be offended by all the stuff about God I put in here. If you don't believe, I'm not saying you should. And if you do, I'm not saying that God is bad, or anything like that. Now that that's cleared up...**

**REVIEW.**


	6. If You Love Me

**A/N: Ho'kay, so... I'M EXTREMELY SORRY FOR THE UBER LATE UPDATE! EXTREEEEEEMELY! I started writing it, and then.. BAM. I got caught up in an extra credit story for French. And then, like two days later, we went into review mode for exams, and I was attacked my math. True story. Anyway, I'm really sorry, and I hope this makes up for it. It's long. It started out as a filler a while back, but then the ending of it is extremely beneficial. And it makes me happy. lovelovelove**

**As always, read and review. And, once again, SORRY! Forgive me?**

Returning to school on Monday made me feel like an animal on exhibit at a zoo. Everyone stared, whispered, and told their friends about it.

Apparently, rumors had flared over the weekend about what had really happened with Shikamaru. Since he was still in the hospital with no chance or desire to get out anytime soon, the only people that knew the true story were Chouji, Sasuke, Ino, and I. I walked through the halls, feeling very self concious. I had heard some of the rumors before today; random people messaging me on Saturday and Sunday to ask me things like 'Is it true that you cut the brakes on Shikamaru's car,' or 'Did Sasuke really pay someone to come hit Shikamaru?' These accusations were both very, very incorrect.

"Hey babe," Ino said from beside me. She had a habit of popping up when I needed someone to walk with. She liked being in at the center of attention, so identifying herself with me was good for her. "How goes the Monday morning?"

I huffed, frowning slightly. "If I were to say horrible and slightly disturbing, would you consider that an understatement?"

"Probably." Ino took this opportunity to glare at some passerby who looked at me wrong. She was a good friend when she needed to be, which was most of the time. "I've heard a lot of horrid rumors about Shikamaru, Sasuke, and you. I've had to set a few people straight, on account of the fact that I don't believe you stripped while being on top of Sasuke's car to put Shikamaru in the hospital."

"How would I hold on and remove my clothes at the same time?"

"Exactly." Ino slowed as she spotted a few of her 'friends' in a group. The quotations are there to signify that they weren't really friends, just people that knew the crap going on so she could stay informed. "Sakura, I'll see you later today. I've got gossip to catch up on and stop from spreading. See ya later, billboardbrow."

"Later, pig." Ino just grinned as she moved away, and I ducked my head to try and make it down the hall without any problems. But the problems seemed to follow me. Someone must have grabbed my bookbag, because suddenly I was straining against the straps. I started twisting my arm out of the strap, but a voice stopped me.

"Are you really trying to get away from me, Sakura?" I turned, smile on my face now, to see Sasuke.

"You didn't have to go through all the trouble of attacking my bookbag, you know. You could have just told me who you were. And where have you been this morning?"

"Ah, very accusatory this morning, aren't we? I did if I wanted to surprise you, I don't like scaring people with my voice, and you were with Ino and she kinda scares me sometimes. I do believe that covers everything you said." Sasuke stopped, and looked around at all the kids that were staring and whispering. He frowned.

"I can't tell if they're looking at us, because we're walking together, or you, because you supposedly killed Shikamaru." Sasuke had taken me to the hospital the day after Shikamaru's accident. My parents were both busy, but offered to take me. I told them no, Sasuke would. And he did. Sasuke mostly stood outside while I went in and talked to Shikamaru. And when they did talk, it was pretty awkward, because Shikamaru doesn't like new people. Either that, or he just doesn't like Sasuke, but I could never guess why.

"What? Now I'm being accused of killing Shikamaru, too?" I sighed, ready to bang my head up on a locker. "Geezus, I might as well not have come to school today. This is too much."

"But if you didn't come to school today, I would have missed seeing you and then I would have had to skip school to see you. And that just doesn't sound fair, does it?"

"You could have always come after school, you do realize that?"

"Yeah, but then I'd have to think about you all day." I just shook my head, trying to look disapproving but secretly dying of happiness. The bell rang, and Sasuke kissed me goodbye. I was blushing scarlet as I walked to class.

I entered the biology classroom, completely unaware that it had gone from loud to silent in less than two seconds. But suddenly, I had that paranoid feeling that I was the main attraction of a new circus. I turned to my bookbag, pulling out the thick biology book, trying to act nonchalant like no one was looking at me.

Then, the whispers started. It was like a roar of insects flying in a single group, all coming toward me. I looked up to see everyone staring, as I knew they would be, and then they all turned away, like it hadn't happened. I could see everyone glancing at me behind bent hands, whispering to the few who don't know the newest rumor. Shikamaru's seat looked annoying empty.

"Class, be quiet!" The teacher yelled, trying to get everyone to calm down. "Be QUIET!" She screamed again, but nothing was working. They were all too wrapped up in this hellhole of high school drama.

"SHUT UP!" Finally, everyone looked up at her. She was panting heavily like screaming took a lot out of her, and I wouldn't doubt it did. "Now, as you all have heard, one of our students will not be in class today because of an unfortunate accident involving a drunk driver. The principal, Tsunade-sama, has told us to acknowledge it but go on like nothing has happened. Never mind that our number one student is lying close to death in a hospital bed because of the carelessness of another person."

Her words, meant to let everyone know that I was not the culprit, didn't help. It sounded like she was blaming me without meaning too, and it was getting quite hard to ignore the glares that were sent my way. I shifted lower into my seat, opening my book and staring down at the picture of a mantis attacking and probably eating another mantis.

The caption read _'Female mantis eats mate after intercourse as a means of survival.'_ I looked at it in horror. Everyone was against me today, huh?

"Excuse me, ma'am, but Tsunade-sama needs to see Sakura-chan," a voice said as my eyes started to blur from the attention I was receiving. I hated when people looked at me; despite the tough-ish appearance I put on, I was extremely self-conscious and hated when people looked at me for too long.

"Of course, Naruto. Sakura, you are needed." I moved to pick up my bag, but she shook her head. "It shouldn't be that long, you will come back."

"Oh, no, ma'am. Tsunade-sama said that I was to remove Sakura from class for an indefinite amount of time because she needed her for something." Naruto was nodding like an idiot now, but I was grateful for the fact that I was getting out of this classroom.

"What is it for?" The teacher asked, suddenly suspicious.

"I can't remember. But here, Tsunade-sama wrote a note because she said you wouldn't believe me." Naruto walked up, handed her the note, and waited. I held my breath, wanting to get out of here ASAP.

"This is her seal. Well, Sakura, it looks like you will be leaving for at least this period. Gather you things." I nodded. I grabbed my bag, picked up my book, and followed Naruto out of the room. We walked to the principal's office. I was kind of freaked out, as I had never been here before, except to… Well, nope. I had never been here before.

We entered the double doors that led into the lobby of the office. Sasuke was sitting in a chair, looking quite bored with himself, and Tsunade-sama was sitting at the attendant's desk, her feet propped up.

"Tsunade-sama?" I said cautiously. She looked up at me, and then smiled.

"Baa-chan, you were right. That lady didn't believe I was really sent by you to get Sakura-chan."

"I told you that you don't have a good reputation from these people," Tsunade responded, closing her eyes and sighing. "You really need to learn when to cut it out, see?"

Sasuke just sat in his chair and smirked. I stood there, watching this unfold with what was probably a very, very confused look on my face. Sasuke patted the seat next to him, and I moved quietly to sit next to him as Naruto and Tsunade started arguing.

"But I enjoy these pranks! Everything else in this school is so boring!"

"Maybe if you actually listened to your teachers and tried to learn, your mind would be filled with something other than brainless plans of pranks!"

"Maybe if you let me take a course I WANTED to take, I wouldn't have to be so bored! Who wants to take Kumogakure literature, anyway? No one! That's who!"

"Tons of people take that class! And if it wasn't for me, you'd be living in that house with no one else! You better be glad your uncle and I took you in, anyway!"

They continued to argue, but Sasuke tapped my on the shoulder, and I completely blocked them out. "You're not even going to ask why you're here?"

"Well, I figured someone would tell me eventually. Frankly, I don't even care why I'm here, just as long as I'm not there," I said, the memories of just a few minutes ago plaguing my mind. All of the eyes staring at me with such intensity… I shuddered from the thought of it all.

Sasuke seemed to understand what I meant, and didn't press me on the subject. "Well, I convinced Naruto to pull some strings and Tsunade was definitely understanding enough, so we got you out of class to help her do errands today. Karin has something up her sleeve to try to make everyone forget about you and Shikamaru by tomorrow, although I'm not really sure what it is. She doesn't do things like this for just anyone, so you must have made quite the impression, Sakura. You're set, pretty much, to not have to deal with all of this drama until we can start setting the story straight." I just nodded, warmth filling my entire being. All of these people were going out of their way to keep me from being hurt…

"But that doesn't mean you're just going to sit here, Sakura," Tsunade said, the argument having stopped a while ago. "I usually have Shizune do my errands, but she's not here. So I've called you, Naruto, and Sasuke out of class for the day to do all of her work."

"It takes three people to do what Shizune does? Yeah right," Naruto snorted. I just looked at the orange clad boy with a small smile on my face. Only five weeks ago, he was pretty much obsessed with me. But then Shikamaru 'accidentally' got him and Hinata talking, and now he wasn't so in love with me anymore. It was a nice change.

"She does a lot of things," Tsunade said, and picked up a stack of papers from beneath the desk. It rose to about her bosom when she stood up. She slammed a hand on it, and all three of us looked at her. "I want you to get this entire stack done by the end of the day. In the mean time, I will go and get your make 

up work from all of your classes so you won't be behind. Like I stated before, you are to be done by the time the final bell rings or else. Go!" Sasuke pulled me up, and grabbed two sheets from the top of the stack, and handed one to me.

"We'll all do one at a time. When you're done, just come back here and get another one. It'll go faster this way." Naruto agreed with this, and grabbed a sheet. All of us looked down at our sheets at the same time. Mine read:

'_Shizune-_

_Don't forget to deliver the letters to all the teacher's mailboxes before the beginning of the day. If you do, then I hope you're ready to run around the school and hand deliver them. Too bad I gave you this note after the bell rang for classes to begin… Have fun!_

_ -Tsunade'_

I groaned, and Tsunade handed me a stack of letters. "I knew someone was going to get it. Have fun!" I took the stack, and went on my mission. Some teachers looked quite annoyed at me for interrupting their class, while others just took the paper and shut the door. Kakashi-sensei smiled when I knocked on the door. He had no class at the moment.

"Kakashi-sensei, I have a letter from Tsunade-sama for all the teachers," I said, handing him a sheet. He invited me inside while he read the letter. I was glad to not be running around anymore. His room was freezing, though, and I shivered a bit. No wonder why he always had a scarf covering his mouth and he had a black headband covering his eye. It looked like it had just fallen there, on accident, but you could never be too sure with Kakashi-sensei.

"And here I was hoping you were Shizune; oh well. Let's see here… Tsunade has you running errands for her?" I nodded. "Well, then you can do something for me. Have you already gone to Ms. Yuhi's room?"

"No, sir, she's further down the line."

"Ah, well then. When you get to her, can you deliver a message for me? Tell her that Asuma has reservations for 8:00 at the Red Dragon to make up for what happened last time. Tell her he says he's sorry, and that the message went through Kakashi first. Bye, Sakura." And with that, he pushed me out of the room. I went about my business, trying to remember the message until I got to Ms. Yuhi's room. When I got there, though, she had a class full of kids who looked at me with knowing eyes, ready to start talking once I left. Ino was in this class, as well as Chouji.

"Ah, Sakura, thank you," she said once she got the letter.

"Kakashi-sensei wanted me to tell you something, as well. He says that Asuma-"

Ms. Yuhi shook her head, and took me outside. "Now, what were you going to say? I don't want them to hear you."

"Oh. Kakashi-sensei says that Asuma will meet you at the Red Dragon at 8:00 to make up for what happened last time. He's sorry, and the message went through Kakashi first."

Ms. Yui just smiled. "Kakashi is trying really hard this time. Asuma really needs to than khim once in a while." I stood there, completely confused, and just nodded. "Anyway," she said, returning her attention back to me, "How is Shikamaru? He's good, I hope?"

"Yes ma'am. He's alive and doing perfectly fine. I must go finish my deliveries, though, I only have a few left, and I'd like to get done soon." Ms. Yuhi just nodded; she understood Shikamaru must be a sore spot for me. She returned to her classroom, and I finished up my task. I went back to Tsunade's office, ready for my next task.

Sasuke was sitting there, playing with a pencil. He was curling it on his upper lip. Naruto was sound asleep in the chair. I looked from one to the other, confused as hell. "Um…?"

"We got tired of doing work," Naruto said, eyes still closed.

"My job is watching you, nimrod."

"And Sasuke is supposed to watch me, so we aren't doing much."

"Oh…" I said, realizing the stack was going to be for me. I knew I had to get my butt into gear if I was to take Shizune's place for the day. I grabbed a small stack of papers, and read the first once.

"Oh, look Sasuke, she's actually working!" Naruto said, trying to do a cute, cute voice.

"Don't try and do cute talk, it doesn't suit you."

I just ignored the two of them and read the assignment.

'_Check in the nurses office to see how many supplies we need to order!'_ I sighed, and ran down there, determined to get all of these done today. After getting the correct numbers, I ran back to the office and handed it to Sasuke. "Tell this to Tsunade and ask her what needs to be done with them. It's the medical supplies." He looked slightly surprised at my taking charge, but did it anyway.

I looked at the next one. _'Order sake for next week.' _I put that one on the desk, as I wasn't legally allowed to order it for anyone just yet.

The day progressed forward. I decided to force Naruto and Sasuke to do actual work, despite Naruto's many complaints. It turned out he was very afraid of me whenever I went into angry Sakura mode, and my cracking fists were more than enough to get his gears into motion once again.

At the end of the day, we were down to once piece of paper, and only a few minutes left. "Come on, guys, we're almost done! This is no time to be tired."

"Easy for you to say," Naruto heaved. "You didn't spend the last hour running the length of the school tracking down a million different people." I just grinned and looked down at the piece of paper.

'_Good job, Shizune. Another day done. Treat yourself to a doughnut or something for all the calories you must have burned running the length of the school tracking down a million different people."_

"Well done, you three," Tsunade said as the bell rang. We were all staring at the tiny piece of paper in disbelief. "You can all leave now."

"That's it?" Naruto asked. "That's all we get? A doughnut?"

"Who said I'm buying you a doughnut?"

Sasuke gently pulled me out into the hallway. Both Tsunade and Naruto were oblivious to our exit, as they were in yet another heated argument.

He led me down the hallway, out the door, across the campus, and to his car. Its black paint shined in the afternoon light, and he pulled his keys out of his pocket. I stopped short, looking between my boyfriend and his car. "What are we doing?"

Sasuke grinned. "Ah, you don't like surprises?"

"No."

"Well, you'll like this one."

He pulled on my arm, but I put an equal amount of force to stop him. "I'm going to see Shikamaru after school."

"We can go see him after this."

"No, I want to go see Shikamaru!"

"I don't this his status has changed much, Sakura. I'm pretty sure he's still going to be stuck in the hospital, unable to do much, still pretty banged up. They said he would live. Now come on."

He pulled once again, but I still tried to stop him. "Please, let me so see Shikamaru! I told my mom to pick me up so we could go!"

"Geezus, I already called her! She knows what we're doing. I'll take you to him afterword. God, if I wasn't your boyfriend, I'd be suspicious. Heck, I am suspicious." He rolled his eyes, and let go of my arm. "Are you coming?"

"What was that supposed to mean? He's injured!"

"Look, Sakura, I don't want to get into this right now. Please, you're going to ruin the mood!" I bit my lip, looking off to the side. If my mom knew, then it must have been good… And it's not like Shikamaru was really going to miss me. Ino and Chouji said they were both going. He would be in good company, right?

"Okay," I said, giving in with a small smile. Sasuke grinned, and pulled me into the car, shutting the door behind me. On his way over to his side, he stopped suddenly, and looked at his phone. I could hear a faint ringing, and I knew someone was calling him. He answered it, and his perplexed expression soon turned into a soft smile. He kept talking, but I could hardly hear any of it.

"Alright, see you later tonight. Yeah, we're doing something this afternoon. Maybe next time. Love you. Bye." He snapped the phone shut, and continued to his door. Climbing in, Sasuke slid into the seat, and put the key in the ignition.

"Sorry for the interruption. My mother tends to forget that I actually do things after school. My brother Itachi," he said with a hint of aggressiveness. "He never did anything afterschool. He would come home, and study. Number one in his class… My parents worshipped him." I just sat in stunned silence. I knew that everyone had troubles, but I'd never heard anyone talk about like their siblings like that.

"It's fine…" I mumbled, feeling extremely awkward at the moment. Was I supposed to say something? Console him, or agree?

We rode in silence all the way to wherever he was taking me. I didn't want to say anything without risk of upsetting him further, and he wasn't saying anything after both the fight and his mother's call.

Finally, we pulled up to a small store or café… I couldn't exactly tell. Sasuke parked, and got out to open my door. "I've got it, no worries," I said, getting out myself. I liked the fact that he was such a gentleman, but I wasn't so far gone that I would need him to wait on me hand and foot.

I had never been to this place, despite living in the city my entire life. It was on the opposite side of town from what I normally went on, and from what Sasuke was saying, it just opened like a few months ago. He was surprised I hadn't heard of it, but I was always out of the loop.

"Is it good?"

"You'll see," he said as he pulled me inside. Sitting in the rather cramped looking café was a lot of the more 'popular' people in our school. None of them even bothered to look at us when we walked in. In a way, I was surprised, as Sasuke usually attracted attention. But I remembered that all of these people were his friends and none of them cared.

I smiled; it was nice not to be stared at for a while. "They're not looking at me."

"Do you want them to?"

"No. I like it." After today, even thought I hardly saw teenagers, I didn't ever want to be stared at.

"Good. I know you would."

"SAAAAASUKE!" A loud, obnoxious voice rang out above the rest. We both looked up, and Sasuke smiled. I saw Karin dancing forward, smiling heavily like she was already drunk. "Sasuke, don't you look lovely today," she said as she gave him a small hug.

"Karin, please. You're being embarrassing. I told you you can't drink coffee; you know what it does to you." But he was smiling, and so everyone else was, too.

Karin glanced over at me, and a grin erupted on her face, too. "SAKURA! You're here! Oh, we were all afraid that today would be too much for you…" She ran over and gave me a hug, which I was not expecting. "We are going to have the best time ever, just for you. It must be hard to have such a good friend in the hospital. Luckily, you have us!"

And Karin lived up to her word. For the next five hours, time just flew by in a slew of laughter, food, and random things. The best part, though, had to be when Temari and Karin challenged Sasuke and Suigetsu to a dance off. I could barely contain my laughter when Temari began to pop, lock, and drop it. Karin was apparently a ballerina, because she was dancing on her toes the entire time.

Sasuke and Suigetsu totally owned, though. Those two were amazing dancers… Well, not ballerina style, more hip hop-ish. If I didn't already like Sasuke, tonight would definitely make me like him.

"Having fun?" Sasuke asked after a few ours of hanging out. I was more than surprised to find that I really was having fun. I can't remember why I had fought coming here in the first place.

"Yeah, a lot of fun."

"Are you glad I made you come?"

"Yes, I'm extremely glad." He just smiled, gave me a small kiss, and we continued to talk.

When 8 o clock rolled around, Sasuke declared it was time to go. I felt bad for leaving; I wanted to stay there as long as possible.

We rode home in the same silence as when we came, but this time it was not the result of a fight. I was just extremely worn out from the fun of being in this cool kid hangout, and Sasuke must have known I didn't want to talk.

I sighed as I stepped out of the car, dragging my book bag inside the house. I had a bit of homework to do that Tsunade had given me after the day of errands, and I was dreading doing it. Luckily there wasn't a lot of it, so I was good for tomorrow. When I stepped in the door, my mother walked up with a smile on her face.

"Did you have fun with Sasuke?"

"Yes, mom!" I said as I headed up the stairs to go to my room and get to work before bed.

"That's good, honey. Did you end up going to see Shikamaru today?"

I froze on the stairs, my mind rushing back to my best friend, in the hospital bed. I had completely forgotten about him when I was with those people… I hadn't even gone to see him? "No mom, I didn't have time to go see him. I guess I can go tomorrow," I said, feeling a twinge of pain in my chest. I shouldn't be feeling so guilty… He was fine, and he had Ino and Chouji to come see him! There was no way he missed me.

I lumbered up the stairs, feeling the exhaustion of the dancing and the many laughs. "I might have to take a nap, and then do my homework," I said, the plan sounding better and better to me.

I slid through my door, dropping my book bag on the ground, and I fell like dead weight onto the bed. My eyes shut instantly, and I felt the rush of exhaustion cover my body.

_It was a hospital room. The lights were on, and there were voices. Three voices, in fact. I walked through the door, like a ghost or an angel might. Sitting on the bed was Shikamaru, and Ino and Couji were in the chairs near his bed. "So she said she was coming?"_

"_She said she wouldn't miss it if she could help it", Ino replied, shedding pity on Shikamaru."But I bet there was something that went on to prevent her from getting here."_

"Who are twee talking about?" _I mused, but they didn't hear me. _

"_I saw her fighting with Sasuke before I came… Maybe something happened there. She kept shouting "I'm going to see Shikamaru!" But I guess she never did…" Chouji trailed off. I realized they must be talking about me._

"I'm right here, guys!" _I shouted. I walked up to Ino, and hit her in the back of the head. My hand sailed right through. _"Dream, this must be a dream…"

_Ino grabbed Shikamaru's had, and frowned. "Look, I know you like her, but she has a boyfriend. Either get over the girl or wait it out. The good news is that Sasuke will most likely play her, like he plays all girls." I glared a hole through Ino's head. How dare she?! Oh wait… This is a dream… This is me saying all of this. I guess Ino was my doubts…_

"_No! I don't want her to be crushed! That would be one of the worst possible things to happen. I want her to be happy. And he would never play her. He was th one that encouraged us to talk, the entire fight."_

_Ah, Sikmamaru must be the hope I have in humans. "Still, Shikamaru… You really need to get over her eventually. I mean, she had a crush on you, and now you have a crush on her. Why cant you two have a crush on each other at the same time? Jeeze."_

"_Ino, I don't ant to get over her. I think I love her."_

"_Don't say that, Shikamaru. Please, don't say that," Chouji spoke this time, giving his friend an earnest look. "That's the worst thing to do is to cut yourself off from every opportunity on just a whim that Sakura _might _like you."_

_Shikamaru sighed, and stared up at the ceiling. I knew that he –or rather, my mind's depiction of Shikamaru- was reverting back to his lazy state. "I still wish she had come."_

"No more, please," I mumbled, turning over on the bed.

_Suddenly, the scenery changed, and I was sitting inside a car, staring out of a windshield. It looked familiar… I recognized it as Sasuke's car. And I could see the school. This was where I was right after our fight, when he got the phone call. _

_I heard the ringing of the phone very clearly in my mind. I could hear everything going on, even the words being spoken._

"_Hello?"_

"_Sasuke, it's Karin," was the reply. A feeling of confusion ran through my veins… This was supposed to be his mother._

"_Karin, I told you not to call me during the day. I'm with Sakura."_

"_I know… It's just… I was thinking about last night. It's really unfair to her that you keep doing these things. I know, it's a new relationship, but still."_

"_What, are you guilty?" he asked, voice coated in anger. "Was I not worth it?"_

_A shrill laugh came from the other side of the phone. "Oh no, you're always worth it. And God! It feels so good. But I don't want you to really hurt Sakura… I like her. She's a good kid. She doesn't deserve to be cheated on."_

"_Look, I know. But she would never do that shit with me. At least, not yet. I need to work on her."_

"_I don't want to be forgotten, you know."_

"_Oh, I know. I'll always have you in mind, every time I do anything with her, just as I imagine she'll have that Shikamaru in her mind, telling her to stop." A grin spread on his face._

"_You are a sick, sick boy. God! But I love it. Well, I've got to get going. See you tonight?"_

"_Alright, see you tonight." Sasuke glanced at me. I knew I must have been staring._

"_Are you going to the party?"_

"_Yeah, we're doing something this afternoon."_

"_Good. But I wanted to get wasted again. It's more fun when we're drunk."_

"_Maybe next time."_

"_Love you, Sasuke."_

"_Love you. Bye." He snapped the phone shut. I realized that the ending was exactly like I had heard it this afternoon. I stared at him as cold shudders ran over my back._

My eyes snapped open. I was breathing heavily, my mind racing to all the run that Karin and Sasuke would be having tonight. I didn't want to believe it…

Wait. That was a dream… It must have just been the doubt in my mind that I wasn't good enough rushing forward. That had to be it.

I decided that after those two dreams, I didn't want another nap. I moved off my bed, and got to work on my homework, trying to forget about the conversations that I had made up in my mind.

Two hours later, I was done and my eyelids were dropping once more. I changed into pajamas, pulled back the covers, and went to sleep.

This time, my mind wasn't plagued with thoughts to cheating. I imagined my wedding. I could see the church, lined with people, all watching me as I walked down the isle, smiling. The bridesmaids were dressed in navy blue gowns. I knew that Ino was the maid of honor. Something in my mind was just telling me that she was.

I smiled at all of my guests, and gave my dad a squeeze when he stopped in front of the altar. He smiled, and moved out of the way. The priest looked at me, and I looked at him, and then he turned to face my husband. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the man I was going to marry. Shikamaru stood tall, and my heart lit up to see him in a tuxedo. He was much taller than I was now, which struck me as funny for some reason. He went from the boy who was barely my height to the man that was standing next to me.

We moved through the ceremony with lightning speed, both of us reciting lines from memory. The man then looked at Shikamaru, who in turn looked at me. He took my hands in his own, and looked my in the eyes.

"Do you, Shikamaru Nara, take this woman, Sakura Haruno, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health for as long as you both shall live?"

"I do."

"And you you, Sakura Haruno, take this man, Shikamaru Nara, to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health for as long as you both shall live?"

"I do."

"You may now kiss the bride."

He leaned toward me, his eyes closing softly as he neared my face. I followed suit, letting my emerald eyes shut as I wanted in anticipation of what was to come.

I could feel my skin tingle as his breath tickled my face. My entire body was alive with happiness, and I felt like I could burst at the seams from all of the joy I was trying to contain.

My eyes tore open, and I was staring at a ceiling. A dark, textured ceiling. I looked over at the red clock on my nightstand. The numbers read 3:12 AM.

I frowned.

"Damn. It was only a dream."

**A/N: Tee hee. Just to let you know, BOTH ITALICIZED DREAMS DID REALLY HAPPEN! No, Sakura's not psychic. It was just a clever way for me to tell what happened during the suspicious phone call and with Shikamaru without having to add all the annoying -- things and make a totally out of way story to clarify. This chapter wasn't originally going to have anything of much value until I got swamped with school and couldn't update. SORRY YA'LL. You know I really do love you. Anyway, updates should happen much much more, as I am now almost out of school. Only one more exam (Ooooooon Moday) and then I'm hoooome free for the rest of the summer! I know, it's amazing! Anyway... Well, I hope you liked my ShikaSaku dream. Foreshadowing, maybe? I hope so! Oh wait, I'm the author... Anyway... I really liked he ending of this update a lot more than the shitty beginning. And as a PS, I'm sure all the fucking cussing that may or may not be n here (I can't exactly remember... DAMN) would break my school's filter, LOL. Soum... yeah. Read and review.**


	7. Hospital Room

**A/N:OMG, this update is so late. ;-; I do have a reason, though, and a good one: I've been in Seattle since the 22nd, without access to my computer, since it was here and all. I got back on Sunday, and worked all day to finish this. Hope you like. Read and Review! Thanks. **

I walked timidly through the hospital, the guilt of not seeing Shikamaru all week bubbling back up into my throat. I hadn't been ignoring him on purpose… And it's not like he expected everyone to visit him every day. He had been in the hospital for two weeks now, and was set for release sometime next week.

I had gone to visit him almost every day the first week, save for Monday. The second week, I went every other day, and this week I've been once. Now, on Friday, the built up guilt had over taken me, and I was pretty much ready to pass out from it all. Which was why I, Sakura, was walking the hospital, heading into a room that contained my friend, Shikamaru, instead of hanging out with my boyfriend, Sasuke.

"Ohhhhh, maybe I should come back. I bet he's sleeping." I was a couple doors down from his room, and I didn't want to go in there. I was nervous. What if he was mad?

"Don't be silly, Sakura! You can do this!" I tried to pep myself up, to no avail. Why should I be so scared? It was only Shikamaru. The kid that's been plaguing my dreams ever… NO. Not thinking of that.

"Alright! Lets go!"

"Go where?" A curious voice asked from behind me. I turned to face the voice, my face probably looking a little 'sun burnt' at the moment.

I know, I should probably stop thinking out loud, and this kind of thing probably wouldn't happen to me. Standing behind me was a boy with shaggy red hair and teal eyes looking at me as though I should be in the psych-ward for this. He had bags underneath his eyes like nobody's business.

"Um, to go visit someone," I said timidly, wondering why I was talking to a stranger in a hospital.

"And you're afraid?" His voice didn't change much in tone after the initial curiosity. I would say that he had his eyebrow raised as a sign of interest, but he… didn't have any eyebrows. That was just a little bit weird.

"Um, kind of. "

"Any reason why you're scared?" For some reason, this question made me blush, and I had to look at the floor to try and hide my reddening cheeks. "Oh, it's your boyfriend," he said with a very certain understanding. "My sister used to go through them until one boy stopped her streak."

"N-No! Shikamaru's not my b-boyfriend! I have one of those!" I stammered, feeling quite stupid for being nervous about going into the room. I didn't need some travelling psychiatrist to tell me that I was being stupid.

"Oh, so you're here to see the boy genius," he growled, narrowing his eyes at me. "Yes, I recognize you now… You're Sakura." I gave him a very strange look, suddenly more uncomfortable with this situation than I would have been talking to Shikamaru. I guess he realized that he must have been freaking me out, because he suddenly spoke once more. "My sister Temari told me about you."

That bit of information took me by surprise. Not that fact that Temari talked about me, oh no; it was the fact that this boy was her _brother._

"Brother? Temari's brother is Kankuro. Besides, I've never seen you at school."

"I know, we don't exactly look alike. I'm Gaara, Temari's brother with chronic insomnia. Apparently, going to school exhausted every day when your father is a very prominent person in society is not acceptable; therefore I am on the home-bound studies program."

"Oh," I said simply, feeling kind of mean for judging him right off the bat. He seemed like a really nice kid.

"Now," he said, the sharp edge apparent in his voice, "Why are you here to see Shikamaru?"

"Who's here to see- Oh, Sakura," a voice said from behind me. Everyone seemed to want to stay behind me today. I recognized it immediately as Shikamaru's voice, and I spun around to see him.

He looked pretty fine, despite the fact that he was on crutches and he had a bandage wrapped around his arm. His black hair hung by his face, instead of up in its usual spiky ponytail. "What are you doing here?"

"Dancing happily in my underwear," I responded.

"Well, that's a sight I'm glad I missed. Nothing more awkward than you in Pokémon undies," he said. He didn't seem so… fragile anymore. He was back to being Shikamaru. On crutches.

"Hey. Don't diss the Pokémon." I glanced over my shoulder to see that Gaara had left, probably bored with our bantering and off to find someone else to talk to instead of sleeping. Shikamaru noticed that he had left, also, and told me to follow him back to his room.

"They moved me, again, to a 'soon-to-be-released' room. It's horrible in there, but at least they let me walk around every once in a while. I'd rather be sitting outside, watching the clouds, but they refuse to let me go outside." I just nodded, following the quite skilled crutch user back to his new room.

He wasn't lying when he said that it was a horrible place; it had no windows, and the walls were a very boring white. It was tiny and cramped, so there was barely enough space for a bed and a bedside table. Probably noticing my incredulous look, he laughed, but I could see that the laugh was paining him. Probably a broken rib or two. "Told you so."

We both managed to situate ourselves on his bed, and then we got to talking. Or, we sat in silence for a bit while I mulled over my week and he stared at the ceiling. "So why are you here, Sakura?"

"To see you, duh," I said, smiling. "Why else would I be here?"

He frowned, and looked at me. "You knew I'd be out in less than a week, and you've been less than concerned with seeing me a lot recently. Anyway, you're acting strange… So I'm going to ask you again, why are you here?"

"And I will tell you again; to see you!" My anger spiked unexpectedly when my stubbornness kicked in. My hair flew around my face in a little whirl as I turned quickly to glare at him. I knew that I couldn't fool Shikamaru for long, especially not with this attitude, but it was worth a try.

His scowl deepened. "Liar."

"Dumbass."

"Bill board brow."

"Copy cat."

"Selfish," he responded, trying very hard not to break his scowl.

"Lazy," I said with a smile, finishing our name calling game.

"No denying that one." His scowl lightened after I smiled, and then he looked at me once again. "Now, will you please tell me what's going on? Ino keeps hinting at weird things that I feel I should know about, and Chouji won't tell me anything because he doesn't know any of it. Ino say's she's been 'sworn to secrecy, and Sakura will just have to tell you herself.'"

I sighed. "Geeze, she tries so hard to keep her mouth shut and just can't do it." I fell backwards onto the bed, and stared at the incredibly boring ceiling. I could feel his eyes on my body, and I fought the urge to sigh again. "It's about Sasuke."

"I wouldn't doubt it," he said snidely, probably frowning.

I let the comment pass without so much as a wince. I wanted to say something, but just couldn't. I really did want to defend him. "Well, he's just been so strange lately. It's like he's trying to pull me away from things I want to do and people I want to hang out with. But he's not demanding it."

"Huh?" Shikamaru said. "You're not making the most sense right now, Sakura."

"Okay. Like, say I want to hang out with Ino. He will be like "Wow, that sounds like an amazing time. But I was hoping that we could go to this party tonight… I mean, you've just been seeing so much of Ino ever since this thing with Shikamaru, and I kinda feel left out. But don't worry; I can get someone else to go." See what I mean by not demanding it?"

"Yeah, I get it know. It's like he wants you to do something that he wants to do and make it seem like it was your idea to go with him."

"I guess so."

I stayed on the bed, still thinking. "So what's the problem?" He asked.

Frowning, I responded, "It just makes me feel weak, you know? I'll call off my plans with someone to hang with him when he does it, and it makes me feel like I really had no choice, when I had every choice in the world."

I rolled over, choosing not to face Shikamaru as he slumped backwards onto the bed with me. I knew that he was just as concerned with this as I was… He probably knew what was going on.

"So you feel bad for him… He's manipulating you?"

"No need to say it like that," I said coolly. I knew he was grinning at my tone and behavior. I hated it. I really hated coming to him for advice like this, but I had to. I needed a best friend.

_Or you like him._

"Sakura… Have you ever thought it just won't work out? That this… this thing with Sasuke isn't really right for you?" I tensed up, surprisingly mad about his thoughts. How dare he tell me this? Sasuke was my boyfriend. I like him.

_You're angry because you're thinking it, too._

"I did, for a second. But then I realized I really liked him. I really like him a lot." I felt bad for saying this. A few weeks ago, I had had this dream about Shikamaru and me getting married. It's weird to think about, but strangely, I liked it. And it has been on my mind, that little fact that I was happy to see him being married to me, and that has been tearing me apart. I didn't come here today to talk about Sasuke. Not entirely.

I came here to see if my heart would flutter when I saw Shikamaru, or if it was all an illusion. I was really hoping it was just an illusion. But I was not so lucky. I could feel it, coming back like a disease that was slowly killing me. Why must he do this to me?

"Really? You don't sound like you're all that fond of him, Sakura."

"Shut up."

"Why did you come here if you don't want to hear what I think? Why bring this up if you don't want to listen to my opinions about your relationship?" His tone went from thoughtful to accusatory in a matter of seconds. My stubbornness and confusion can do that to him.

We sat in silence for a while. I didn't want to say anything for fear of blowing up again. I needed to calm down. I needed to get over Shikamaru once and for all.

But I can't, can I?

A slight buzzing came from my pocket as we laid there. In one quick moment, I had my phone out of my pocket. **One New Text!** It exclaimed happily from the little view screen I could see. Shikamaru grunted, and I flipped open my phone to read it. To my surprise, it was a text from Temari.

"_sakura, we ned 2 talk l8er bout sasu and shika n ur visit 2 hospital 2day."_

I stared in confusion at the text. Not the text talk, oh no, but the fact she knew I was here. Gaara must have talked to her since I got here… Oh man, she's probably going to blackmail me. Like she knew I liked Shikamaru. OH NO! And if she told Karin, I'd be screwed. Karin might like me, but she likes Sasuke so much more.

After a few seconds I responded. _'OK. Wut time?'_

Shikamaru made his grunt again, and I closed the phone as the message sent. With more pressing matters on my mind, my little blowup at Shikamaru seemed ridiculous and childish. Heck, a lot of our fights seemed ridiculous and childish.

"Shikamaru… I didn't mean to get so angry about this. It's just… I- I'm so confused." Confused was a good way to put it.

I rolled back over so I was staring at the ceiling instead of the wall, and he spoke. "It's okay. I shouldn't have spoken like that to you."

"Good God, don't we sound like a sappy moment in a soap opera…"

He laughed, and I couldn't help but smile as I sat back up. He just laid there like a bump on a log, eyes closed, reverting back to his usual lazy state. I just looked at him, and it hit me how much I liked the way his hair looked when it was down. It framed it face quite nicely, and it was like he was a different person without changing at all.

It was nice.

"Let's go outside," I said suddenly, getting the urge to run around in fresh air. He opened his eyes, and stared up at me.

"I can't," he responded simply, confused as mess as to why I suddenly wanted to go outdoors.

I laughed. "And who really cares? You're almost out of this joint. You're probably too lazy to break any rules, so they won't be watching you. You haven't been outside in forever. Let's go. It's a nice day; we can watch the clouds."

He sat up slowly and looked at me in the eye. He was giving it great consideration, weighing out every possibility. I could see the gears turning inside of his head, and when he finally grinned, I knew that he was going to say yes.

"Alright. Let's break out of this prison." I smiled, and slid of the bed. Shikamaru followed suit, grabbing his crutches and walking toward the door. He went our first, and I followed him once more, toward who knows where.

Judging by the way he went through out the halls, he probably knew where all the good exits to escape from where. And the more that he slid through the hallways, I had a feeling that he had already been outside a few times before I suggested it. Sneaky little boy, letting me think I was liberating him.

Unnoticed save for a few non nurses and the vending machine guy, we made our way out of the door and to the outside world. True to my word, it was a perfect day to sit back and watch the clouds. We moved out to a small garden type thing that was on the side of the hospital, and sat down on a bench.

Another buzz came from my pocket. _'ur house, 8:30 pm 2nite'_ I put away my phone, and turned to Shikamaru.

An hour later, we were still outside, having a rather interesting conversation.

"Oh, come on, Shikamaru. Tell me who this girl is."

"No."

"Please? I want to know who she is!"

"No."

I paused for a second. We had come upon this conversation solely because she had made a comment about this girl he liked, and I immediately jumped on him about it. Part of it was actual curiosity because my friend liked someone. The other part was the fact that this boy that I used to like and kind of like now liked someone. Most likely, another girl.

"All right. What grade is she in?"

"I can say that. Our grade."

"Do I know her?"

"Yes."

"Do I know her well?"

"How am I supposed to know."

I frowned. He was probably avoiding giving me a real answer for that one, since that would give it away if I did know her well. There was all of Ino and Hinata, really. I mean, there are others, but I only know those two really well.

The silence extended for a few seconds as I thought about who it might be. "So,what about Tayuya?" I asked quietly, remembering the last night before the hospital.

As soon as I asked, I immediately wished I hadn't set a word. Shikamaru got this weird look on his face, as though I had stepped on a mine or something. I was truly scared that he would get up and leave. We sat in an awkward silence for what felt like ages. It just stretched on and on…

And on. "God, Shikamaru, I'm sorry. I did-"

He cut me off right there with a speech of his own. "I… I don't think I ever really liked Tayuya. I think she was just a way for me to show you I was just fine without you."

"I don't know, the way you were kissing her at that party… And why would you want to show me that?"

"Oh, haha. And because you were getting over our fight really quickly, by going to a party with Sasuke and getting to know all of those people. All the people we used to dislike were your friends. And I needed a way to get back at you. Tayuya was suddenly thrown into the equation the day I found out she was the person who parked next to me. That say, she was such a wreck. I was late getting to my car, and she was just sitting in hers, crying. Regardless of my not knowing her, she looked hurt. She reminded me somewhat of you when I knocked on the window. Aha, this is probably so boring and useless to you."

I was captivated by his story, despite my deep dislike of Tayuya. "No, go on," I urged, wondering why he was telling me all of this. Maybe sitting inside that hospital no really getting to talk to anyone as getting to him. But I liked him in this "pass on the Wisdom" mood of his.

"Well, I knocked on the window, and she looked really startled. She rolled down the window, and asked me who the fuck I was. I told her my name, and I asked her what was wrong. I mean, what kind of man leaves a crying woman in a car? Anyway, she went off on this little rant about her boyfriend, and how much of an ass he was, and how she hated him. I just listened. She went on and on, and I just listened. At the end of her rant, she introduced herself as Tayuya Otoga. She called me a little dumbass for talking to her, but asked for my number anyway. 'Just in case I need a friend.' She had told me with a smile as she started her car to leave. I stood there as she pulled out of her spot, and watched her leave the parking lot.

"About a day later, she called me after school and asked me if I wanted to go to get something to eat or something. I was going to say no, but then I saw you sitting there, talking to Sasuke, and I just agreed without thinking about it. I don't know why, but I decided then and there that I would get over our broken friendship as well as you had. I met her at a fast food joint, and we started talking about different things. She seemed fully over her boyfriend by then, which was weird to me, but I went along with it. We talked over a number of subjects, like school and interests. She liked playing the flute, but never joined the band because she didn't like one of the girls in it. She called her a whore more times than I can count. We did this talking thing more and more after school, and I was starting to feel better for the first time in a while.

"Well, one day, she asked me about you."

"What?" I asked, suddenly confused. Why would Tayuya ask about me of all people? I mean, even if I hated Shikamaru at the time… Actually, especially because I hated him at the time. I wouldn't have been talking to him.

"Apparently, she had heard the drama. And she asked me what was going on with the pink headed girl that hung around a lot with Sasuke and Neji, and I guess my silence must have told the entire thing. I 

couldn't answer her. I just sat there, staring at the table, feeling like an idiot for not being able to talk about it. I imagined you laughing at me with all of your friends, and yet I still couldn't stand to say something that could come and make you even more mad at me. So I kept quiet. But she realized what was going on, and smiled. "I can make up for what you lost," she said to me, and then kissed me. Out of the blue, she kissed me, and I liked it. She told me that there was no reason to waste my relationships on you, and that she would make up for years of no girlfriend in days. I just accepted that and decided that I was going to like Tayuya. This was a few days before the party, and we spent a lot of the time between after that kissing.

"But now that I'm here, and she hasn't visited or called, I knew that we were both just using the other one. She was talking to her ex- boyfriend after our fight, and stopped whenever I came out, angry. She told me that I looked hot angry, and tried to kiss me again, but I told her to stop, because we both knew it was just a show for him. There was no denying it, and now I know it was just rebound. And I don't care." He paused for a second. I was amazed at his story. I affected him so much…

Wow.

"So… who is the girl again?"

"It's y-…" he said. My mind flew to the girl, Yuki, from our biology class. Rumors had been flying lately that she did like Shikamaru, and I suddenly didn't like her very much, either.

"Oh, finish? Please?"

"No," he said, and I knew that my quick question had really made him mad. I glanced down at my phone, and noticed it was 6:53pm. I had been here for almost four hours, talking to Shikamaru. I had to get home for dinner and I had to make sure I was there when Temari came over.

"Well, as enlightening as this day has been, I really have to be getting home. I do hope you understand." I waited for his response, but he just nodded and kept his mouth shut. I must have made him mad, like really mad. Or he was just tired of talking. "Okay, well… bye."

"Bye, Sakura. See you when I get out?"

"Of course," I said as we both got up and started toward our destinations. He went toward the hospital, and I moved to my car.

"I almost told her that I like her," he mumbled.

As I was walking away I could have sworn I heard him say something. But when I turned around, he was inside. "I wonder what that was…" I said as I climbed into the driver's seat and started the engine. I raced home, careful not to go too fast though. The Konoha police were quite scary people, even if they were all of Sasuke's relatives. They were cops who were unafraid to give tickets, not caring who you knew or anything.

When I got home, my parents made no mention of my lateness. My mother just told me that my plate was in the fridge, and so I went to go eat. It was weird for them not to get on me, like they do when I stay out a little late because of Sasuke. I guess Shikamaru was a different story for them. He was my best friend, after all.

8:30 inched nearer at I sat there and ate my meal. I was nervous about what we were going to talk about, and why she needed to talk to me tonight. I guess it couldn't wait until tomorrow, and it was very serious, or else it could be done over the phone. Oh geeze, I was not looking forward to this. She was Karin's friend that wanted to kill Tenten because Neji liked her now. I stood no chance.

Finally, 8:30 was here, and pretty soon after that, the doorbell rang. I walked slowly through my house, wanting to know what was going on, but not wanting to see Temari. What if she was going to beat me up? She could probably kill me; I had no real fighting skills what so ever. Maybe if I had some enhancer, I could totally punch her through a wall or some crazy shit like that. But I didn't.

I opened the door slowly, and I saw Temari standing there, just as I knew she would be. But she wasn't angry looking. On the contrary, she looked as nervous as I must have looked to her.

"Hi Temari. Come on in," I said, stepping aside and waiting for her to take her shoes off. We walked to the empty living room (I have told my parents that I didn't want them to be there when Temari was over) and both took a seat.

"So, what do we need to talk about?"

"Well… It's about Sasuke and Karin…" She paused. She looked nervous. "I don't know how to say this…"

I got an incredibly bad feeling at this point. "Y-yes?"

"Well…"

**A/N: Yeah, that's what they call a cliffhanger. NOW. I want to say, I like hos well this story is doing. It's noting compared to Plan Sasuke Ino Breakup, but it's my 3rd highest on hits and reviews. I'd like to push that to second, please! My Tenten story has 4600 hits, while this one only has 2500. I'd like for that to go up, even though I don't think it will ever beat it. No, what I want is to beat it review wise. I, Sakura has 46 reviews (THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! I LOVE YOU!) while Tenten's MP3 Player has 55. Let's see if we can't get 10 reviews for this chapter so it can be second highest! Please? Please? THANK YOU! And remember to tell all your ShikaSaku loving friends, too. AND OH! I be writing Ouran fic soon. You readz? Now I really have to go before my carpal tunnel sets in or something. My wrist hurts...**

**ENJOY! REVIEW! TRY TO REACH 10 MORE REVIEWS!**

**And this chapter made me like Tayuya. I'm not supposed to like Tayuya... But telling her and Shikamaru's story was... well, I think I mghit like her now. D;**


	8. Karin's Story

**A/N: Kayso, y'all should be extremely proud of me. It did not take me a month to update. It took me less than a month. Like, 3 weeks or something. So yaaaaaaay! I like this chapter, eve though it's another 'story' chapter, it sets up what the plot for the rest of the story is going to be, and I desperately hope that you guys will tune in and read it. I do like dow well this story is doing, and I am immesely happy to say that I got the amount of reviews I wanted! Now, all I need if the hits to raise about 1000 more, and this will be my second best story EVER! LOVE YOU ALL.**

**Read and review? Sorry for any spelling mistakes. It's 2:55 am, I'm tired, and I don't have a beta. Um.. can you survive?  
**

A wave of shock and anger ran through my body. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I just couldn't. Could Shikamaru have been right when he said that Sasuke was just playing me?

Oh god, oh god, this wasn't true. It couldn't be true.

My hands were clutching my legs with as much force as I could muster, and I was staring at the floor with an insane amount of intensity. Temari sat across from me, watching me.

"Are… are you alright, Sakura?"

Her question was as dumb as they come, for me at least. I wanted to say '_No, of course I'm not all right. You just told me that my boyfriend was cheating on me. With Karin. I am NOT okay.' _But that seemed a little harsh to say to someone who was helping me. Oh, and I couldn't get any words out. That might have helped the nastiness stay in.

I just stared at the floor, attempting to let the news sink it. Just a few days ago, Sasuke had told me he loved me. Just a few days ago, he had told me I meant more to him than anyone else in the entire world. Just a few days ago, I felt better with him than I had with anyone else. He was my first boyfriend…

Temari got up, and patted my back. I looked up at her, the dead soul probably showing through my eyes.

"Sakura?"

"I'm fine," I said, my voice flat and dull. It didn't even sound like me. It sounded like someone else had taken over my voicebox.

"What are you going to do?"

I sat there, trying to think. But the voice, the other person, spoke for me. "Nothing, for right now. I'll just wait it out. See how it goes."

I couldn't see her face, but I knew she was probably surprised by this. "Nothing?"

"Why bother?" That was a good question. Why bother with anything, anymore? Why bother with guys? Shikamaru likes Yuki, and Sasuke is a damn sex maniac. I could just swear off guys forever. Become lesbian. Become a nun. I guess becoming a nun would be easier, since I couldn't force myself to like girls.

Nunnery. Would I actually have to wear one of those nasty black things and be called sister? Sister Sakura sounded a bit weird to me. And I don't think I could enter the nunnery at this age, so I was still susceptible to those stupid men. All of them are idiots…

"Look, Sakura… Karin didn't want to hurt you. She told me to tell you. She told me that she thought what Sasuke was doing was wrong, and-"

"THEN WHY DOESN'T SHE STOP!" I screamed, letting myself take over for a moment. I jumped up, and looked Temari in the face. The anger was boiling rapidly to the surface. Temari looked surprised, yet again, that I went from numb to angry in the span of a few seconds, but I was about as unpredictable as 

I could be at the moment. "Why on EARTH does she keep going on and seeing him? Can't she get her own boyfriend? Or someone else's, GOD!" I was shaking now, not even bothering trying to calm myself. What point would there be in doing that?

The blonde frowned. "Hey, this is as much his fault as it is hers."

"Yeah, but HE didn't send someone over here to tell me, and HE didn't say that he wished I wasn't hurt or whatever. HE is continuing to lie about it, which either means HE cares enough to spare me this, or HE doesn't care. Either way, SHE was the one who caused me this pain by telling me, though you, and I highly doubt SHE really does care. SHE probably wants me to break up with him!" I huffed, my green eyes probably glowing with anger. I saw Temari's light up in anger, as well, but it dulled after a few seconds.

"She probably does want you to break up with him."

Suddenly, all my anger evaporated. I looked at her with a confused look etched into my features. "Huh?"

Temari took another deep breath. "You might want to sit down," she instructed me. "This might take a while."

I did as I was told, and Temari took the seat across from me. Another deep breath, and then she began.

"Karin and Sasuke have known each other since they were little kids. Their parents were good friends, because her dad was the owner of a big music corporation, and Sasuke's father developed weapons and things for the government and the people. 'Protection of the People' was the Uchiha motto, and they stuck to that with their weapons. It was sold to police forces and the like, but I digress. They grew up in each others company, going to the same functions with their parents. They used to play together, as little children do."

"How do you know all of this?" I asked suddenly. "How do you know…?"

"Well, Karin told me this story when I asked her why the hell she couldn't leave Sasuke alone." Temari gave a dry laugh, and sighed. "She was always so obsessed with him…"

"You've wondered before? You've wondered why she keeps coming back to him?"

Temari nodded. "She is my friend, and I noticed a sickening pattern with her. She would have a boyfriend, and compare him to Sasuke. Sasuke had a girlfriend, and she would try to sabotage their relationship. Her world centered on him. It's not healthy. Now can I continue?" I nodded.

Temari continued. "As they got older, Sasuke became more handsome. It was something that everyone noticed. At his schools, girls used to flock to him and fall all over him. At the age of 12, he had more girls in love with him than most people do in a lifetime. Karin was one of them. That's when I met her, when we moved here. In middle school, she was the rich girl that everyone sucked up to, but no one really liked. My father is a prominent politician, and so she made herself known to me at the earliest convince. 

Apparently, her father wanted more connections, and my father was just another one to add to the collection. When I met her, I hated her, too.

"She was rich, that was for sure. She flaunted it in every way possible. She was never extremely pretty, though. Sasuke, on the other hand, was the cool rich boy. Even I fell for him a little when I first got here. He was nice to me, and talked to me, even though I was from another country and he was younger than I was. But I soon got over him. Sasuke… he had a new girlfriend hanging off his arm every other week; sometimes shorter, sometimes longer. Karin didn't care. She adored him.

"Eventually, they went out. She was about 14, he was 13. I believe… I think, that's the time she lost her virginity. To him, of course. Who else? Some people care about who their first kiss is. Karin's first kiss and her first 'lover' was Sasuke. When they broke up a few weeks later, She was hurt. Broken. We were freshman in highschool. I saw her like that, pitiful and alone, and I befriended her. I became her best friend over the course of the semester, and she began to tell me about Sasuke.

"As first, I thought it was just something that had hurt her. A boy she liked that used her. But then, he broke up with his girlfriend and she came crawling back. I was surprised. She had told me that she hated him now. Yet, here she was, back in his arms. It's been like that since then. He breaks up with a girl, she goes back. Recently, it's gotten worse. They've been seeing each other regardless if one of them has a boyfriend or girlfriend. Sasuke uses her for the sex, and Karin lets him use her."

"It's like… she's addicted to him," I said, looking at Temari. "She can't stop being with him."

"Yeah," Temari said quietly. "Some people would call it endless love, but I think it's just an infatuation that's gone too far. Way too far. And I think that one of these days, it won't be convenient for Sasuke to sleep with her. It won't be in his best interests to have her anymore, and she will be broken. Permanently."

We sat in silence for a while. I didn't know what to say… How could I be angry at Karin? She was like a helpless little child. She loved him…

"He… He doesn't even care about her, does he?" I whispered, staring at the ground once more. "He doesn't care about any of his girlfriends."

Another sign came from Temari. I wondered how many times she had done this, or if she had done it at all. "I think… I think he does care for his girlfriends. But I think that he has an addiction, too. I think he is addicted to what Karin can give him, and he keeps at it until his girlfriend either agrees to his request, and he leaves Karin, or says no, and he ends it and goes back to her. She knows this, too, but she doesn't care. How can she?"

I sat there, trying to imagine my response to Sasuke if he ever asked me to sleep with him. Before tonight, I would have probably said yes. I would have agreed. "Wow."

"Yeah. It's a lot to handle, I guess. Makes you think, though." Temari was sitting in her chair, watching me. I could feel her eyes on me, but I kept my gaze on the floor.

"It really does."

We sat like that for a bit, Temari watching me and me watching a small ant on the floor. I wanted to squash it. How easily I could just kill it, break it into pieces. Just like Karin's heat. I could sleep with Sasuke, and stay with him, and become his new Karin. And she would be broken and dead inside. But… I couldn't do that. After this story, I couldn't bring myself to be angry at her, just him.

"How are you feeling?" Temari asked, watching me still. I sat up, and looked at her.

"Shocked, angry, confused. I don't know. I can't sort it all out. I feel sorry for her, ya know? And I'm angry at him, but I can't hate him. I don't know why, and that makes me angry at myself."

"Don't be mad at yourself, Sakura. You… you were just a victim in all of this. I keep thinking that I should have told people about Sasuke and Karin earlier, you know? Let everyone know about it, let everyone see the perfect, cool guy for what he really was. Then no girl but Karin would date him, and he'd be miserable and she'd be happy. But I don't think that would fix her problem."

I smiled, albeit weakly. "You want to try and fix her? Even after all she's done?"

"She's my friend," Temari said. "I want to make sure she's okay. I want to make sure you're okay, too, Sakura. I might not have known you nearly as long, but still. You're a good kid with a bad boyfriend. I think you deserve better, just like I think Karin deserves better."

I tried to think of better when she said that. I hadn't been going out with Sasuke for long, but… It was still weird. "Better?"

"Sasuke is scum, really. I mean, he cheats on girls until they sleep with him. He's only 15, Sakura. It's not unheard of, but that's still a lot of sex." I nodded.

Better… My mind flashed with images of Shikamaru. I blushed heavily, and hoped that Temari didn't read my mind somehow. That would be weird.

Luckily, Temari just continued on with her talking without taking much notice of my blushing. She might have thought the word sex made me blush. Or thinking of a naked Sasuke would make me blush, but how wrong-

No, that one did make me blush.

"So… what are you going to do?" I looked up at her, confident that my face wasn't glowing red, and hoping that there wasn't a faint blush on my cheeks.

I thought about it. And thought. What could I do? Not much, I guess…

"Nothing."

"Huh?"

"I'm not going to do anything right now," I said.

Temari, yet again, looked confused. "What?"

"We've been over this. But this time, nothing for a different reason." I grinned. "But I don't know if I should tell you."

She frowned. "And why not?"

"You're Karin's friend. If I have a plan that might hurt her, you'd tell her and it would be ruined. Temari, I can't do that. I need to expose Sasuke for what he is." I felt the despised anger boil up in my again. "I have to do this."

The blonde across from me sat very still for a moment, as if thinking it over. Her eyes stared off into space, and I sat very still, as well, waiting for her answer.

"Whatever you do, Sakura," she said, finally. "Whatever you are planning, I want to be in on it. I have to be in on it. Karin is my friend, but if she has to get hurt to heal her, I will hurt her. Even if she hates me for it. I have to help. As long as it's not too extensive. Or physical." I nodded, understanding her position. And I had help… good.

"I understand. It will more or less hurt Sasuke, not her. Karin… she's the victim, right? She about as victimized as people can get. She doesn't deserve this."

"Good," responded Temari. "So, what's the plan?"

"I think… I think I'm going to do nothing for now. Build up my forces. If Sasuke has enough people willing to follow him, then this drama 'war' isn't going to do much good. No, I need people. You might have to work with people you don't like-"

Temari cut in, "I'll wok with Tenten if she helps you, but only because 1.) Karin needs this and 2.) this whole situation has made me try and get over Neji."

I smiled again. "Alrighty then. Once we get the forces built, and people on my side… Well, we'll jump that hurdle when we get to it." I sounded like an old woman right there, I just knew it. My mother used that saying a lot when talking to patients about medication and things.

"You mean, you're not going to clue me in?"

"No, I mean I haven't been able to plan that much yet. I'm not a master strategist; I can't do all this in my head. I need to see it played out before I can think…" Temari frowned.

"You mean to say, you can't plan ahead that well."

I laughed sheepishly. "Heh… not exactly…"

Her frown deepened and I knew that she could see her options failing fast.

"But I know someone who is, and he'd love to help. I'll talk to him later. For now… we work on the people, okay? There are people who think Sasuke is scum, and there are people who idolize him. We need the people who think he's scum, first. They'll be more helpful to what we've got going on. Once we get them, we can get the others." Temari nodded, and stood up. I realized that she probably had to go, and showed her to the door.

I waved goodbye as she started out the door, but my motion was cut shot by a very unexpected hug.

"You're a strong girl, Sakura," Temari whispered to me.

"I've been told."

"Karin didn't send me," Temari whispered, yet again, as she broke the hug.

"I know," I said. "But I'm really glad that you came anyway."

As Temari walked to her car, I moved over to the window facing the front of the house. I could see her get in, and start the car up. As she pulled out of my driveway, recollections of the dream I had had about Sasuke talking on his cell phone to Karin came back to me.

Was that all… true? Had I known, even then, that he was going to pull a stunt like this? No, I didn't. I really hoped that he wouldn't. I really liked him…

A tear rolled down my cheek as Temari pulled out of the driveway. Another soon followed, and I couldn't even see her car drive down the street.

I broke out in tears, uncontrollable tears. I was crying for many reasons…

One, I was angry. I was angry at Karin, for being so easily victimized. I was furious at Sasuke for being so addicted to sex and power. He felt he had a power over Karin, and needed her. He used her. He used me. I was angry at myself for falling for him so easily. I was angry for not listening to Ino and Shikamaru when they told me what I was getting myself into. I was angry for caring so much.

Two, I was upset. My boyfriend, whom I liked, had been cheating on me. My very first boyfriend… I fell to the floor and curled up into a ball. This... this wasn't as bad. The upsetness was outweighed by the anger by a long shot.

Three, I was confused. I wasn't that upset about Sasuke, and I didn't know why. Sure, I was semi-upset. But… part of me was relieved. Part of me was glad that I could go out with Shikamaru. And of course, that same part was deeply hurt that he like Yuki and not me.

And finally… I was disappointed in myself. Not for caring so much. Not for being upset or for being confused. I was disappointed that I wasn't that strong girl I pretended to be for Temari. I wasn't the strong, confident, smart girl that I tried to be in front of others.

I was disappointed that I was a weak, self-conscious baby. And for that reason, I cried more than I should have, and more than I ever wanted to.

**A/N: Nyaaaa, hope you liked "Karin's Story". I think it explains very much about Karin and hopefully a little about Sasuke. This might sem a little OOC for Sakura, and if you think so, I apologize. I, personally, don't think that it's OOC, but then again, I do, so... Ahahah, I'm making no sense. So I hope you liked it, and I really do hope the next one is a little quicker in coming. I'm in a writing mood lately, I'm enjoying it a lot. It's like any trace of writers block that I could have once had has died and gone to heaven. Or hell. Or writers block cage. Iunno where writers block goes when it dies. I'd like to know, though. Maybe I could catch some and make it stop me before I begin to ramble once more. Okay, so... I'm writing a few new stories, actually! One is an Ouran fic. I might write a HP fic for the fun of it. HarryHermione... XD Yeah, I know. Not canon. Whatever to you haters. It will make sense when I write it. Anyway, I want to write an ATLA fic (ZUTARA FOREVER), but I don't know how I'm going to go about that. **

**And the thing that should excite you the most... SHIKASAKU fic! I'm doing a challenge with one of my friends. It's a 25 drabbles challenge, basing on quotes. Like, a quote, and I somehow relate it to ShikaSaku. She's doing KibaHina, hopefully. She has an idea for it, at least. Hey, if anyone is interested in joining us, you should drop a line and ask me about it. I'd love to see this kinda go around to other couple fandoms, as well. Like NaruIno, I mean. Anything is fine, you know. So... That's basically what I've been doing since the last update. My internet went out for a while. But yeah. READ AND REVIEW. ENJOY. **

**Long authors note is looooooooooong. Yet again, sorry for any errors in my story/above message. I wouldn't put it past me to butcher a word right now. XD **


	9. Shattered World

**A/N: So sorry this took so long, but I'm finally updating! School has eaten my soul, but I promise I'll try and update as much as possible. I still love you all! Read and review. With enough incentive, I might just update faster! **

I took a single, deep breath as I stared at the doors into the main building of my school. I didn't want to go in, but I knew I had to, so I pulled on the handle, and watched as it opened. At first, the eyes stayed where they were, but a few people noticed us.

And really, that's all it takes.

Those few people hit the shoulders of their friends, and more and more eyes were diverted toward us.

"Is it bad that I'm creeped out by a bunch of people staring at me?" Shikamaru asked, glancing over at me. I giggled nervously, trying not to meet anyone's gaze as they stared.

"No," I said, and we began walking toward his first class. People were whispering, quite loudly, about him.

'_I thought she was the one who pushed him in front of a car in the first place?'_

'_Noooo, she drove the car that hit him, duh.'_

'_But I heard it was Sasuke… Then again, Sakura and Sasuke are broken up, right? They're NOT? She's obviously easy, then, or he would have left already.'_

My cheeks flared up, and I had to stare at the ground to try and hide my red face.

"Hey. Hey, don't listen to them. You're not easy," he said, trying to cheer me up and affirm my worth. It was not working. I mean, come on… Just because your best friend tells you you're not a slut doesn't mean you're not one. But that's just it…

I'm not one.

But that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt to hear the gossip, right? God, drama is completely ruining this year.

Despite my problems, though, more people were focused on Shikamaru. He was still on crutches, which is why I was helping him to his classes. Well, that, and this was part of his plan. Apparently, I was supposed to spend as much time with Shikamaru as possible, so Sasuke would get jealous or some crap like that and admit he was cheating on me with Karin.

Frankly, I didn't get it at all. Why did I have to spend time with Shikamaru, it's just that… I was glad my cheeks were already semi-red, or Shikamaru would have asked me why I was blushing. Then I would have had to get into an explanation, and that would have been plain embarrassing.

"Hey Sakura!" A deep voice called from behind me. Is it bad to admit that his voice still sent tingles up my spine even though he was cheating on me? I guess it would.

I turned around to see Sasuke, and felt my face break out in a smile. He returned my happiness, and walked up toward me.

"Hey, Shikamaru," he said coolly as he came closer to the two of us. Sasuke was a little taller than Shikamaru now that Shikamaru was on crutches, but I didn't really take note of this.

My attention was more or less focused on the scowl that had broken out on the lazy Nara's face. I started to wonder why, but caught myself, reminding me that this guy in front of us was cheating on me. With Karin.

Ew.

He leaned down, and kissed me. I still felt the yearning for another kiss on my tongue. I knew I wasn't over him, even if I was supposed to be.

Then, I thought about where Sasuke's mouth had been on Karin, and that yearning stopped dead in it's tracks. So much can change in a few days after someone decides to ruin your first relationship by telling you that the guy you were dating is actually having sex with this girl who is completely and utterly obsessed with him, and your best friend decides that you need to get back at your boyfriend by hanging out with him so much more than you hang out with your boyfriend, which makes you happy and confused at the same time, and your best friend seems to be in love with a girl named Yuki, which also makes you a little… Okay, really upset.

Huh. My life is kind of confusing.

It took me a good two seconds to realize that Sasuke was waiting for me to answer something. I felt a lot like a cliché in a romance novel, ignoring the man to think about my extremely complicated love shape, but hey, it happens. This is highschool, after all. It's like one big cliché.

"Uhhh," I glanced over at Shikamaru. He was nodding his head very minutely, and I took that to mean _'Say yes!'_

"Yes!"

"Oh, so you do have something to do after school?" Sasuke asked. I could hear the confusing in his voice.

"Errr… yeah. I was going to help Shikamaru with this project that was due in our biology class, since he was in the hospital and all."

"Oh."

"Sorry." I apologized, feeling really terrible. Sasuke looked disappointed, like I had actually hurt him. Hurt him?! HA! Cheater.

"It's not problem. I was just thinking that we could go over to my place and, well, you know. Chill out, relax, watch TV, and all that. We haven't had a night where it was just the two of us in a long time, and I kind of miss that. They were special." His dark, dark eyes looked into my own, and I could almost feel the sadness and disappointment in them.

He was a good actor.

Unless he actually wasn't acting and his 'special night alone' was his way of asking me to sleep with him. Oh God… was it time already? I'd have to ask Temari. "Yeah, they really were. But Shikamaru just got out of the hospital, and I think I should be spending some time with him. I didn't really see him a lot when he was in there, and I kind of missed hanging out with him, too."

I saw Sasuke stiffen, and look over at a grinning Shikamaru. I was looking at Sikamaru too, puzzled by the triumphant smile on his face. When he was my look, it was quickly replaced with just a 'too-bad' grin, but Sasuke wasn't fooled.

If I hadn't been looking, I wouldn't have noticed, but Sasuke glared at Shikamaru for just a slight second. "Sakura, can I talk to you for a second?"

"Uh, I need to help Shikamaru get to class," I said, staring uncertainly at Shikamaru. He ruined it. The whole plan. With his stupid, beautiful, amazing grin.

Sasuke smiled. "I can take care of that easily." He picked up the bookbag I had set on the floor, and he looked over at a white haired boy. "Suigetsu!" Suigetsu turned around, looking at Sasuke.

"'Sup, Sasuke?"

"Help Nara to class, will you? He's an invalid, and they need help. It'll be your good deed for the month."

Suigetsu sighed, and rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'll help the handicapped boy to class." Sasuke threw him the bookbag, and Suigetsu motioned to Shikamaru to follow him. Shikamaru glanced at me, but Sasuke started pulling me the other way.

"See you, uh, later, Shikamaru," I said as Sasuke and I started heading into a less populated part of the building. Some people tried to follow us, but Sasuke's friends made sure they stayed where they were with a few looks and a good few threats.

Up the stairs we went until we came to the third story, and Sasuke stopped close to a group of kids that probably didn't care about gossip or anything. I could see Chouji standing over there with Shino and some other kids. He was watching me, curious as to what was going on. Sasuke didn't notice.

"Sakura, what is going on with you and Shikamaru?" He asked, his voice strained.

I folded my arms across my chest, and glared at the ground. "We're friends. He was in the hospital. It's kind of expected that I hang out with him."

"Right." His voice was cold. "But you're blowing me off to go 'help him with his biology project'? What the fuck is that?"

"It's something the teacher-"

"I know what the project is. But he's a genius. He can do it himself. Does he really need your help?"

My eyes narrowed as I turned my head to look at his face. "What's that supposed to mean? That I'm incapable of helping someone?"

Sasuke sighed. "No, baby, I'm just saying that he doesn't need your help. He can do this project on his own. I need you. I really do." His hands found their way to my waist, and I knew he was leaning in to kiss me. I pressed my hands on his chest, keeping him at bay. His black eyes opened quickly, staring me down.

"Like hell you need me," I said, seeing Karin in my mind's eye.

"Now it's my turn to ask what that's supposed to mean," he said.

I felt anger rushing inside of me. "You know what I mean! Karin is what I mean! How long did you think you could get away with cheating on me, huh?"

He let go of my waist, and I pushed off of him. He narrowed his eyes at me, and I swear to God that they were red. "Don't even BRING her into this!"

"You brought her into this when you decided that it would be a good idea to sleep with her while you were DATING ME!" I screamed, backing up even further.

"Shut up!"

"No! You do this to every girl, don't you? You use her until you can get what you want, don't you?!"

"Shut UP!"

"And you were trying to sleep with ME, too! I knew that's what tonight was about! I knew it! How could you even think that I would EVER want to sleep with a pig like you? For all I know, you have an STD or something!"

"SHUT UP!" By now, even the stick-to-themselves kids had turned to watch us blow up at each other. Some people had evidently got past Neji, Sai, and Jugo, because they were all there, staring at us.

"You CHEATED on me!"

"LIKE YOU'RE SO INNOCENT YOURSELF, SAKURA!" Sasuke's eyes were gleaming red now, the black hardly showing at all, just a few lines and dots. I didn't have the curiosity or the calmness to wonder why his eyes did that. Or, better yet, how they changed color.

"WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?"

"YOU! The entire time we were dating, EVEN WHEN YOU WERE MAD AT HIM, you were crazy about him! What do you THINK, the whole world is blind? It was OBVIOUS that you were as in love as a high school girl could be with you STUPID BEST FRIEND! God! The entire time we were dating, it was LIKE you were cheating on me!"

I froze, my heart sinking fast. Had I been the one to do this to Sasuke? Had I really cheated on him in some way?

No, he did this to all the girls. That's what Temari said. I believe Temari. He was a pig. A cheating man whore.

He noticed my hesitation. "I was RIGHT! You little WHORE! You didn't even CARE about me, did you?"

I looked at him, feeling helpless. "I… I did care about you, Sasuke…" I said weakly.

"You STUPID, RUN OF THE MILL WHORE!"

"STOP THAT! I'm NOT a whore! You're the whore, Sasuke!"

He laughed evilly, his maniacal gaze landing on me once more. The people surrounding us were captivated by the scene, as most break ups weren't in plain sight, for the world to witness.

"Like hell I am! I never cared for Karin! I never have, and I never will! I was just using her for what I wanted! But YOU! You were in love with SOMEONE else while you sat there, kissing me! You probably imagined that he was on the receiving end of your love, isn't that right?"

My eyes opened wide as he confessed this all for the school to hear. People stood with their mouths wide open, gaping at us.

"But she LOVED you!" I pointed out, still stuck on Karin.

He laughed for real this time, finding this more hilarious than I would have imagined. "And what, did Temari tell you that? Did she come to you with some sob story about how Karin is in love with me, and she can't help herself? Did you ever stop to wonder why my last girlfriend broke up with me?"

I stared at him, trying to understand it all.

"She broke up with me because Temari came over to her house, and told her that I was bad mouthing her to our little group of friends. She said that I was saying how easy Reihyou was, and how I wish she wasn't so loose, but it was all right. And how Karin had defended her, and that Karin thought it would be best if Reihyou broke up with me, to save herself more drama. And she LISTENED! She listened to a girl that just wanted me all to herself again. And now, you've done the SAME, EXACT thing. Except, there's more TRUTH in this lie."

Temari had… lied to me? To help Karin? It was all coming together so quickly… She wanted me to make a big deal out of Sasuke, and then the whole world would hate me, and Karin would get her way once more.

"She… she lied…"

"Of course she did!" Sasuke said, coming toward me. "I thought you were SMART, Sakura! You should have known that Temari was just trying to help her friend get what she wanted! Geeze!"

He stopped in front of me, inches away from my body. "Sakura, wake up! They were deceiving you! They lied to me, too! Everyone is a victim here!"

I couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that that whole story was made up. It just wasn't possible. There was no way… "You're lying to me, bastard!" I said, pink hair flying was I jerked my chin upward, looking him full in the face.

"What?" He asked.

"This is all a bunch of lies! I don't even see WHY I believe you anymore! You SLEPT with Karin! You think it's OKAY to use her for whatever you need! I don't give a DAMN what she says, you are a PIG! You deserve to by thrown in JAIL!"

His eyes were back to having an angry edge to them as he glared down at me. "You'd take THEM over me? You'll REGRET THIS, Sakura," he said into my ear, backing away.

"You think I need to be thrown in jail? WHAT ABOUT YOU? You had SEX with Shikamaru at that party! You were DRUNK, and were RECKLESS. And THEN you had him so DISTRACTED when he ran out of there that he CRASHED and almost DIED!"

Now he was lying to them about me! I could hear the gasps of the people that were watching as Sasuke started a rumor that I could probably never live down. I had drunk sex with a guy and then he almost died.

"I did not!" I yelled. "I did NOT have sex with him!"

"That's a load of BULL! I heard YOU! I know you did!"

I could feel the world crashing down around me once more. I could see the world going black every time I blinked. It felt like ages I sat there, staring into the darkness, but I knew it was only milliseconds. In every blink, I could see Sasuke's evil grin, his lies building further until I was ruined and shattered. His last girlfriend had moved a few weeks after their breakup because her dad 'got a job in a new town.'

I think it was because she was so miserable, and her parents pitied her. But my parents would tell me to suck it up. My mom would say it would just make me stronger. My dad would say he wasn't moving.

"I… I did NOT!"

"LIAR!" Sasuke said. We both knew that he had won… we both knew that I would forever be deemed as the cheater, while he would go on to get a new girlfriend, and do the same thing to her. The process would repeat itself, and no one would ever do a thing about it.

It was a cycle. The girl gets hurt, and the boy lives to tell the tale to his next girlfriend. I felt so used… I felt so violated. I knew that Sasuke was feeling triumphant right now in his little victory.

"Consider us done with, Sakura. I can't stay with a cheater!" He turned around, and people made room for him as he made his way back downstairs. I just stood there, stunned to standing still.

I could hear this whispers erupt again as the bell rang, and they all left to go to their classes. I would be the newest piece of gossip to his the newsstands. I was their new target. I stood there, motionless, as the tardy bell rang. I was late.

Huh.

I had never been late before… well, not without a good reason. And this was as good as any. Tears leaked down my face as I finally moved, walking slowly toward the stairs.

I was forever going to be the cheater. The whore. And he was clean.

I was going to be the biggest piece of gossip for a while. God, I couldn't even show my face anymore. They would all attack me.

And it was all lies.

There was a sadistic part of me that was saying 'Well, welcome to high school.' But I knew that high school wasn't this bad for everyone, oh no. It just happened to be hell made from bricks and cement to me.

Slowly, I walked toward my first period class, tears still on my face. Before I got there, though, I crossed in front of his first period class, and I couldn't help myself. I peeked in, and spotted him sleeping.

I had to tell him, right?

He could help, right?

Yes. Yes, Shikamaru could help. I knocked on the door, and Mrs. Mitsuki opened the door. "Hello, who are… Young lady, why are you crying?

"C-Can I see S-Shikamaru please?" I asked helplessly. The woman frowned, and then looked over at the now waking boy.

"Shikamaru. Hallway. Now." He rubbed sleep from his eyes, and then saw me. And my bloodshot eyes.

He got up, and grabbed his crutches, making his way out to me. "Thank you," I whispered to the teacher, who just nodded, and shut the door behind us.

"Sakura, what's wrong?"

I sat down in the floor across the hallway from his class. He followed suit, sitting down much slower and keeping his leg straight out.

"I… We… Sasuke and I… f-finished… r—ru-ru-rumor and sex a-and w-wreck and I don't know what to do!" I said, leaning my head onto his shoulder, speaking faster than I probably should have been.

Shikamaru wrapped his arms around me. "Shhhh… It's okay. Tell me what happened. And slow down this time."

I took a deep breath, trying to stop the tears. "When S-S-Sasuke and I w-went upstairs, he s-started yelling and we got in a f-fight. He s-said I was the c-cheater! And e-everyone believed him over me, 

because he's Sasuke Uc-Uchiha and I'm just Sakura. And n-now there's a horrible r-rumor about me g-going around, and I'll never live it down!" I cried, burying my head into his chest. It was so warm and strong… He was so warm and strong.

I felt tingles up my spine as he quieted me once again and began to stroke my hair. I cuddled closer to him, still crying, but feeling more at home with him than I ever did with Sasuke.

"It's okay, Sakura. It'll be alright," he said as he tried to calm me.

"No it won't!" My voice sounded muffled against his shirt. "Everyone will hate me and I'll have to move and Sasuke will win and the world will know that I'm a cheater, even when I'm not a cheater!"

"Shhhh," he quieted me, holding me closer. "No one will think that, Sakura. You're not a cheater. Everything will be fine, I promise. Everything will be fine, I'll make it all fine. Don't worry."

And even though I didn't believe that he could actually make this all go away, I trusted him. I trusted that he would make this all fine. And I felt good about it.

"It'll be okay. Everything will be okay."

**A/N: So like I said, School has eaten me. So I hopw you like this chapter; it was a good hour of sleep (plus a lot more of non-sleeping time) that I needed, and I used it to make sure you all are happy. So please, tell me that my lost sleep was not in vain. Did you like it? Review, then! It would make me incredibly happy if you reviewed. And told your friends about my story. And submitted it to ShikaSaku C2 communities. That would make my day, and those are the types of incentives that make me want to update faster. Whereas, if no one reviews or reads, I'll cry and never wrte another chapter again.**

**Well, that's all I got. I'm DEAD tired. I really do hope you like, but I'm too tired to think up a great authors note. Thanks for reading. Er, I don't own the characters. Only the idea. Night, everyone. Zzzzzzz Rai**


	10. Colorblind

**A/N: I haznew update? Why yes! It is new! So um, read and review. This story finally surpassed my Tenten story with hits AND reviews AND favs AND alerts! The only thing it's lacking is C2 adds. I'm so proud of this story! hearts**

My head was buried into the pillow with the covers thrown over my head. "No, I feel sick," I mumbled as my mother told me to get out of bed once more.

The knocking got louder. "SAKURA! I highly doubt you are sick. You were just fine yesterday morning!"

"It hit me when I got to school. I just don't feel well enough to go," I whined quietly, trying to make my voice as scratchy as possible. I heard my mother grumble and walk off. I threw the covers off from my head, and took a deep breath.

There was no way in hell that I was going to school today. Not after…

I felt like crying, but over the course of yesterday I had run out of tears. There was nothing in me that could spill salty water down my face anymore. I was cried-out.

So I was just left with the feeling, which had manifested itself in the core of my being. It ached constantly, burning my insides horribly.

I really felt sick.

Just not the kind of sick they let me get out of school for.

My mother walked in the door with a thermometer in hand. "Open," she commanded. I opened my mouth, knowing full well that my temperature would be just fine.

About a minute later, the annoying beeping sound came from the device in my mouth.

"It looks like your temperature is normal, honey. You're not sick."

I groaned. "It's not my head, mom… It's my everything else that hurts." She sighed, obviously getting annoyed with my antics. It's not my fault my ex screwed me over, you know? But of course, I wasn't going to tell her this. That would be incredibly insane.

So I just sat there, trying to convince her that I truly was sick. I needed to convince her.

We sat in silence for a few minutes, my mother probably trying to figure out why on Earth I was trying to stay home, sick, when we both knew I wasn't.

"Okay, I'll let you stay home. Obviously you believe you have a good reason for doing this, so I'm going to trust you on this. But, Sakura, if this becomes a habit, I will schedule a session with you. I'm not kidding." I just nodded, and rolled back over in my bed. I heard the door shut as my mother left.

Seconds later, I could hear a muffled conversation between my father and my mother. I had to guess at some of the unhearable gaps, but I got the gist pretty quick.

"I'm not sure what's wrong."

"She's not usually like this."

"I know."

"I'm staring to worry… I mean, yesterday, she locked herself in her room and didn't come out. Now, she's skipping school."

"Maybe there's a test she's skipping."

"Maybe something happened with that Uchiha boy. Or maybe Shikamaru and Sakura had a fight."

I flinched as I heard my mother said his name. My insides lit up once again, and I began to tremble, my eyes searching for those drops of hot, salty water.

20-some minutes later, I hear the cars start. I'm not sure what happened between then and now, but I'm guessing I fell into another depressed sleep. I peeked out of my window to make sure they were both pulling out of the driveway and leaving me behind before I even bothered to think about getting up.

Truthfully, I wanted to sit in my bed for all eternity, staring at my empty, blank, nothing ceiling. I wanted to fade into the cotton sheets and disappear into the world of inanimate objects. I didn't want to think. I didn't want to move. I just lay there, listlessly staring.

The only thing running through my head was what he had said. What he had lied about, to everyone. By now, the whole school knew me as the girl who tried to kill someone. As the slut who slept with everyone.

And they saw him as the poor, innocent victim. Of course, some people would be on my side, I guess. Ino, Shikamaru, Chouji, maybe Temari or Tenten. Temari would actually probably want to stay with Karin…

Even thinking her name made my heart get heavy one more.

It felt like I was going to throw up every time I started to feel hurt like this, but I knew it was just the 'sickness' coming over me. It didn't help much.

If someone could see me right now, I wouldn't doubt they would describe me as dead or catatonic.

I continued to stare at the ceiling, feeling the emptiness associated with too much pain.

I was lost.

I was hurt.

I wanted to feel anger; to be strong about this. He cheated on me! I should be furious! But no, I was just… broken. I shouldn't let him get to me like this, but for me, there was no other choice. I couldn't stop myself from feeling this way.

Slowly, my depressed non-thoughts filled my head, drowning me in sorrow. I closed my eyes, tears slowly leaking out of them. I couldn't go back. There was no way I would ever be accepted again. They were going to stare.

I didn't know if there was every a day that I would go back to that school and not be labeled a slut. I didn't know if I could ever feel the way every kid should; I didn't know if I could ever go back there and feel _normal._

No tomorrow.

My depressed now-thoughts had me slowly drifting back into the dark sleep that I experienced last night.

_I was back in school, walking through the halls, my head down. They were all whispering again. But this time, it was like they didn't even see me. They didn't really see I was there. They were talking about me, I guessed, but none of them looked at me._

_I guess they didn't need to. I spotted Shikamaru, his back turned to me, talking to Ino. They looked older, somehow. It occurred to me that everyone looked older. _

"_And so then, I was like, 'Uh-huh'. It gets so old when she talks. It's like she never really has anything to say anymore. You think she'd get out of this by now, but what-the-hell-ever." Shikamaru laughed at Ino's expression._

"_You two used to be close. You can't find anything?"_

_Ino sighed. "Nope! It's like all she can do is sit there. And mumble. It's just sad."_

_I watched in horror as Shikamaru leaned down and gave Ino a kiss. My heart felt like it was ripping open again. I felt like the world was closing in on me. As they pulled apart, Ino was smiling. "Eventually she'll get over it. And if she doesn't, we'll be in college soon enough. Come on, kiddo, lets go."_

_And they shut their lockers, and walked off, Shikamaru's arm around Ino's shoulder. I watched them disappear into the blur of people. All I could do was stand there and stare, feeling numb._

_It hit me._

_I knew why they were older. I knew why everyone was older! I knew why they were leaving for college. They had left me behind._

_I was the girl, the one that had lost everything. _

_They just left me. I started to get a panic-y, sad feeling. If they were older, I was older, right? I had to be in my own future! I began to run, looking in every classroom for a sign of me. It was hard to distinguish someone from everyone else; they all blurred together._

_In one group, I saw Sasuke, his arm draped over some new girl, Karin having graduated last year. He was talking, and everyone was hanging on his every word. He was still god in human flesh. His hand moved around the girl's chest, and she just blushed. I wouldn't doubt she slept with him like Karin did. Like he old everyone I did._

_I couldn't take it anymore_

_Finally, I came to a classroom. It was mostly empty, because the bell had yet to ring. I recognized the teacher as the man who taught remedial English to juniors and seniors. Maybe he had gotten a different teaching position! That was it… There was no way I was in remedial English._

_But I knew I was wrong. As I stared at the girl, the one with the soulless eyes, I couldn't help but feel that this wasn't me. But I knew it was; she was in black and white. My eyes looked dull gray, and my hair was hanging limply around my face. She sat there, chin propped up on my desk, staring at the floor. _

_This girl, older me, looked pitiful. There was no other way to say it. She even was depressing colors._

_And what's worse, she obviously had no friends. If she did, if I did, I wouldn't be sitting in this class so soon, all by myself._

_Alone. _

_The man looked over at the girl. "Sakura, did you ever finish Hamlet?"_

_She shook her head, not even looking up at him. He just sighed. _

_I stared at her as she continued to stare at the ground. It felt like an eternity in a second. Time must have passed, because the bell rang, and people started to file into the room. They all phased through me. They didn't even look at her._

_Even the people who sat near her didn't even notice her. The guy in front of her dropped his book bag on her foot. She didn't say a word. He didn't, either._

_They acknowledged neither Sakura in this room. It was almost as if their eyes passed right through her. Like she wasn't there._

_And I guessed, after months of being known as the slut and slowly losing all of her friends, she wasn't there. She was gone. That person was just an empty shell._

_Suddenly, that empty shell looked right at me. She stared, I stared back._

_She mouthed the words "Help me."_

And then it was gone. I woke up crying, my heart thudding painfully in my chest. I felt the longing to help her, to save me from myself, but I also felt trapped. Trapped in this misery.

Everyone will grow to hate me. I will grow to hate me. Fuck, I already hate me! The tears, which seemed to replenish themselves after my dream, came out more quickly than before.

They old me that I hated myself more than I hated him. What if I had just broken up with him when I found out! When did I have to try this plan? Why did I even go out with him in the first place?

My fault, all my fault. A small part of me was smart enough to hate Sasuke, but the rest of me was not following suit.

Was I forever ruined? Was I going to live the rest of my life here, nothing more than a memory to a few people who knew me as I once was and not by my slut status?

I couldn't bear it. I was not going to live my life as the cheater, was I?

Soon enough, the tears stopped flowing, and I began to feel that emptiness take over me once more. My heart thudded painfully in my chest. My insides felt sickeningly warm. I wanted to throw up.

I wanted to die.

As a doctor, my mom dealt with a lot of kids who tried suicide. She would always tell them that they weren't failures, and that everyone would miss them after they were gone. Most of the time, people believed her, and after a few months in the mental health ward, they were normal again.

One child, though, had apparently told her that they were such a failure, they couldn't even end their life right.

I used to think that was a terrible mentality, and I felt so sorry for that kid. I mean, why would they ever want to stop and give up like that in the first place? And to consider yourself such a failure as to think that their life being spared was just another mess up…

I hadn't understood it until now.

Now, I understood what a life as a failure would be like. A life as an empty shell. That was my life.

Has Sasuke's rumor really killed me this much?

I went back into a whirlwind of thought. People, ideas, and images rushed in and out of my brain.

Suddenly, it all stopped. I made it stop. I couldn't take the thought. I just let myself die on the inside. It was easir that way. I stayed like that for hours, completely empty.

I was still on top of my bed at around 12, when my phone started to thud on my nightstand. I looked over at it. It only buzzed once.

I had a new text message.

Oh, joy.

I slowly reached for me phone, still dead to myself. The text icon appeared on the front screen, and I flipped it open, only to see a text from Ino.

I clicked 'View.'

_Sakura, where are u? u cant give up this easily every1 is talkin, but if u were here, theyd believe u. now they think ur chicken_

After a few seconds of staring at it, I hit reply.

_They're all right. I'm a failure. I'm chicken. I hate myself too much to come._

Sent.

Ino would probably be worried after that message. Usually, when she sent me texts, she'd complain that I was the only one in the world who actually texted whole words and put periods and shit.

But I think she'll be more worried about the content than the style.

Another buzz. I flipped the phone.

View.

_Sakura, NO!! u cant do this ur a fighter. U need 2 FIGHT HIM! Its not ur fault hes a dick. This whole rumor is NOT UR FAULT!_

I chose to ignore it.

She sent me another one.

I deleted it. I didn't want to hear any more about this rumor, or another pep talk about fighting it. Sasuke had won. Sasuke will always win. There was nothing I could do about it. I couldn't help my dream Sakura. I would be just as empty as her.

My pain numbed, and I continued to stare at the ceiling.

I was a cheater. Might as well get used to it.

I don't know how much time passed. It didn't feel very long, only a few minutes, but my phone buzzed again. I flipped it open. It was from Shikamaru, dated at 3:05pm.

I hit view once more.

_I'm coming over to see you. _

Reply.

_NO. _

Sent.

Buzz.

View.

_Yes._

I didn't reply to that one. If he was so set on coming to see me in this pitiful state, then let him. I don't care. Maybe, if he sees how disgusting I look, all holed up in here, he'll hate me, he'll move on and find a new best friend to take my place. Maybe Yuki, his crush, or Ino, his oldest friend in the world.

And no matter how much it would kill me to know that I drove him away, it would help me become empty and numb to the world.

God, it sounds like I'm pregnant or got raped or something.

I couldn't figure out why I was so depressed over this whole Sasuke thing. But I was. It hurt that my first boyfriend cheated on me. It hurt that Shikamaru liked another guy. And it hurt that my whole highschool thought I was a cheater.

It was probably all of that, crammed into one, small amount of time that did this to me. It was all of that that was making me fall apart.

And it was this combination of realizing that my boyfriend cheated on me, my crush only liking me as a friend, and being known as a cheater for the rest of highschool that made me want to crawl up in a hole and die. All of that, plus Karin being an ass, Temari most likely lying, Shikamaru getting in an accident, blaming myself, forgetting to come visit him, and every thing else in the world that was making me do this.

Lets face it, I was horribly depressed, with no really good reason. I could say it was all of that, but not even all of that would lead to this, right? And if it did…

Depression sucks. I let my mind go numb after that thought, sitting on my bed for God knows how long.

I heard Shikamaru arrive. He turned off his car, and knocked on the door. I didn't bother getting up.

"Sakura!" I didn't bother answering. Maybe if I was quiet, he'd leave me to my wallowing.

No such luck. He actually knew where we kept the spare key, and he came in. I lay on my bed.

Should I throw the covers over my body to pretend like I was asleep? Nah, he wouldn't believe that. I heard him walk up the stairs, and I tried to think of something to do that would make him give up. But the thinking was too much. I couldn't stand it.

I just left myself drift into nothingness again.

He pushed on my door, and it opened. I could feel his gaze on me, taking in my bed ridden form. "Sakura, have you been sitting in bed like that all damn day?"

I didn't say a word. I didn't even nod.

"Geezus, child, you can't do this to yourself. This isn't you fault. Heck, it's not even true. So what that Sasuke started a rumor about you? No one will believe it anyway."

"Did they believe it today?"

My sudden question made him uncomfortable. I knew what the truthful answer was. Yes, of course they had talked about it.

"And did he make it worse?"

Again, silence.

Sasuke's last girlfriend had left because Sasuke not only started one rumor, oh no. He made a whole hoard of them. The poor girl couldn't escape anything. Too bad I hadn't really known his track record before I stared dating him. Too bad I didn't believe anyone when they tried to tell me what it was.

I had thought he was sooooo cool, but really, he was just a jerk. That didn't make me feel any les responsible, though.

"Sakura, you can't hide in your room forever." His voice was quiet, and when I moved my eyes to look at him, he was staring at the floor.

"No, I guess not. But I can at least live part of it here."

"You have to come back to school."

"I could be homeschooled, you know."

"You can't give up on the situation!"

"Watch me!" For the first time today, the sadness was replaced by anger. Of course, it just had to be directed at Shikamaru.

"NO! I will NOT let you waste away your life because some asshole decided to make you into his next horror story! You can't do this to me Sakura! You can't do this to Ino, or your mom, or anyone! You can't give up on us! So what if Sasuke turned out to be a jerk? There are other… guys…" He voice lost all of it's strength at the end of that little rant. I looked back over at him. He was still staring at the floor.

"You can't give up on yourself like this," he said, speaking quietly once more.

I just sat there, my gaze returning to the ceiling.

"You'll give up on me eventually, Shikamaru. You'll leave me behind, and I'll just be empty." I was thinking of my dream again.

"What?" he asked, confused.

"Nothing."

Silence ensued.

And more silence.

"Look, Sakura, you can't just sty up here. You can't let him get you down."

"I was planning on going to school tomorrow, actually. If I can handle it." It was either that or going to a session with my mom. Unless I could make myself get sick…

"You can. You're a strong girl."

I continued to stare at the ceiling, choosing to be completely silent. I don't know how long it took him to leave, but eventually he did. Yet again, I was left alone. If I continued to be depressed like this, I really would be all alone. That would suck.

Eventually, my parents got home. My father usually got home before my mother did, but today, they arrived at almost the same time. As one was getting out of their car, the other got home. I didn't know who got home first. I didn't want to look out my window and see.

My mother was the first once to walk up to my room, though. It was about an hour later, and she was carrying a bowl of soup.

"Sakura, honey, Inarie told me what happened." Inarie was Ino's mother; that whole family seemed to have an obsession with I names.

"Look, I know this must be hard on you. I can't believe that he would do something like this…" She set the soup on my bedside table, and sat down on my bed. I could see that this was hard for her. I'd like to think she didn't like the thought of her daughter being hurt in this way.

"I understand why you've chosen to cut yourself off from the world, but you cannot do that. You can't live the rest of your life in this room. But I don't know if I can allow you to go back to that highschool. What if, after this rumor, he decides to try and rape you? Who knows. I don't want you back there." Huh. Leave it to my mom to think Sasuke would actually want me back.

"Your father and I had a good talk about it. He doesn't want you there, either. But we can't teach you from home… We won't be here."

I just sat there.

"So, we decided upon an option, and talked it over. We even talked it over with the person involved. They think it's a good idea, as well."

Oh shit. I did not like where this was going.

"We think it's a good idea for you to go live with your uncle Jiraiya."

**A/N: Oooooooooooh. Ehehehehehheheehe. KAYSO I NEED OPINIONS: I want Naruto and Sai to make a much bigger appearance in this story when Sakura moves. But as they've already been mentioned, it seems kind of cheap to have them in it again. Sai was barely mentioned... SO: Would you guys want to see more Sakura/Sai/Naruto interaction, or should I bring in a whole fleet of OCs? It's up to you. If you want Naruto and Sai there, I'm pretty sure I can come up with a way to get Naruto there... IF YOU GUYS DON'T THINK IT'S STUPID. And don't worry about the ShikaSaku! It's coming! There was a hint for it in this angst ridden chapter, as well. Notice: "You can't do this to me, Sakura!" It hurts him to see her like this, too. LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE **

**So um... review with your vote? Sai and Naruto or not?**


	11. Further Away

**A/N: YAY NEW CHAPTER. It's only been a month, I tell you. Errrr, I guess that's not a good thing... Anyway, I hope you like it! And if I got AWOL this month, like I usually do, it's probably because I'm probably failing chemistry AND because of NaNoWriMo. Yeah, I'm finally participating. REMEMBER TO REVIEW! LOVE Y'ALL.  
**

"Talk about perverted," I groaned, giving Ino one of those "Oh God" looks as she helped me pack my things.

We were both still reeling over the news that I was going to finish out my semester (and possibly stay the summer) at my uncle Jiraiya's house. She was a little more upset than I was over the whole thing, considering I was getting to go to a new school with a ton of supposed 'hot guys.' Well, that and the fact that her best friend was leaving her for a new school because her best friend has a douchebag for an ex. Actually, I should say had. Sasuke died two days ago from ODing on Viagra.

Just kidding.

"Well, look on the bright side-"

"Bright side; yeah right," I snorted, folding another shirt into a suitcase. Ino shot me a small glare for interrupting.

I just rolled my eyes and continued to pack. With most of my stuff already on its way to uncle Jiraiya's, my room looked incredibly bare. The light walls were stripped of all their posters and the things that made my room mine were all packed up. It was kind of sad, in a sad way. If that makes sense.

Ino cleared her throat, and I looked over at her. "Anyway, like I was _saying_ before I was interrupted, look on the bright side; at least the legendary porn writer won't hit on you. You are his niece, after all."

"Actually, he's my mother's adoptive uncle. His sister adopted her when her parents were killed by a car crash. And if he doesn't use me as 'material', he'll probably use me to pick up other women." Ino laughed at my misfortune and finished up the last of the packing, which happened to involve shoving an old picture of us into the last suitcase.

It was a picture from when we were little kids, and both of us were wearing goofy grins and shoving cake into each other's face. Kiba and Shikamaru were in the background, one laughing, one staring at the sky. Give you a hint which one was staring at the sky:

He was the guy who had gone into an angry, reclusive shock when I told him I was moving. We hadn't spoken since.

"Thinking about Shikamaru?"

Ino's voice jerked me out of my trance. "Whaaa—No. I was thinking about something else entirely."

"Yeah yeah, sure sure. Look, Sakura, he's just mad that you… Well, you're leaving. You know how he gets. He's not one for a lot of change or troublesome shit." Ino put a hand on my shoulder, giving me an incredibly sympathetic look.

I just shook my head. "It's not like it's my fault that I'm leaving, you know? I didn't ask for this. I didn't want to leave."

"But you didn't want to go to school, either." My gaze hit the floor.

"I couldn't go back to school. Not with him there. You just don't understand how uncomfortable it--!"

Ino scoffed. "No need to be making excuses for me, Sakura. I feel your pain. Assholes are hard to avoid, especially one like him that would make it his goal in life to make sure you're miserable before he played the victim/the nice guy and got a new girlfriend. I understand."

I walked over to my bed, and fell onto the mattress. "Then why doesn't he understand?"

A sigh escaped the lips of the blonde. "He… He just doesn't want to think about you leaving, 'Kura. It's pretty far away, and he doesn't want to deal with the whole 'not having his best friend there every day' problem. You've always been in his life. And now, you're leaving."

"It's not a problem for you or Hinata or Kiba or any one else. You guys are all grudgingly accepting I'm leaving…"

We both sat in silence. I was still trying to understand why he was so annoyed by my leaving. It's not like I was doing him a disservice or anything. I was the one who was being made to leave. I was being forced out of my hometown. I didn't want to leave, but I couldn't very well stay…

It made no sense as to why he could just ignore me like that, and why he was the only one. "It's not like he can't come and visit me…" I said crossly.

"Sakura, you're moving _really_ far away. Jiraiya lives in the middle of nowhere compared to here, and it's so far. You know that with the deer, his chronic laziness, and his schoolwork, Shikamaru hardly has time for us _now_. Couple that with the fact that his parents hardly let him drive anymore, so I'd say he has a pretty good reason to be pissed."

"What are you, Shikamaru's secret keeper or something? Do you like, stalk him?"

"Don't take out all your damn frustrations on me. It's not my fault he's angry."

The silence came back as Ino finished packing the last box and I continued to stare at my textured, white ceiling. I don't know how long we sat there like that, not saying a word. But after what felt like forever, I slowly got up from my bed, and sat on the floor next to her.

"I'm sorry, Ino. I just… I don't get it."

Her eyes softened.

I smiled.

The silence continued. It's ridiculous that one second, silence can divide us and put a wall between us, but the next, the quiet is just letting us stew in our enjoyment of each other's company.

Ew. That sounds weird. It sounds like we're lovers.

Another sign came from Ino. "You should tell him, you know. Before it's too late."

"Tell him what?" I asked, thinking she meant apologize to him or tell him something that I said I'd tell him a long time ago. I couldn't remember anything I had said I would tell anyone, especially not Shikamaru. He wasn't the person who I'd hide something from.

"You know what I mean, Sakura. Don't play dumb."

She was sounding like one of those moments in the movies where the friend tells the main character that she needs to tell the one who has been there that she-

No.

"Ino, I am _not_ in love with Shikamaru!"

Ino cast me a confused look. "What? I was going to say you should tell him goodbye. Just in case, you know. But if you," her confused face transformed into a smirk, "came to that conclusion, then you must be hiding something!"

My eyes narrowed as I realized that she was trying to drag this out of me. She was smiling deviously, like she had just won.

"Look, Ino, I'm not in love with my best friend. I've never thought about being in love with anyone."

Well, that was a lie. Earlier this year, I'm pretty positive I thought about being in love with a certain spikey haried Nara-esque boy.

But then again, I also thought about loving Sasuke as well, and we all know how that turned out.

And my feelings toward Shikamaru had most definitely changed. I mean, I didn't get butterflies when I saw him. As much. And I didn't think about him all the time… Just part of it. But he's my best friend. I'm supposed to think about him and be happy to see him. Yeah.

The other side of my head, the one that decided it wanted to be fair and unbiased, was telling me that if I didn't like him like that, then why was I secretly happy that he was upset I was leaving? Didn't that mean that he liked me more than a friend, because he was having different reactions than my other friends?

"Sakura, you've liked him for so long. This might be your last chance before your feelings change."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

Ino frowned. "You don't know who could be looming in those halls at that smaller school. You'll be the new girl, the one that everyone is paying attention to. You'll get attention from guys, probably. If one of them happens to be cute…"

"Look, Ino, if I really was 'in love' with Shikamaru, then I'd definitely ignore those guys, right? Even if a super hot guy that usually ignores all other girls took an interest in plain old me, then I would only compare him to Shikamaru, right?"

Another frown. "You know I don't believe in the theory of "One True Love," for girls in high school. We're fickle. We flirt. We like attention. If a really hot guy slathers attention all over you, you'll probably be more prone to thinking about him than thinking about Shikamaru. And then that guy becomes 'The One,' and Shikamaru would never know."

"Then so be it. And I don't like him, so I don't know why we're even talking about this when we should be getting the last of the boxes in the car so I can leave. It's going to be a long trip, you know. A very dull, long trip. And mom and dad want to take me without any of my friends, to have the last of the 'family bonding time' we'll get for a while."

Ino just shook her head at my response, but stood up and grabbed the first of 2 boxes anyway. I followed suit, grabbing the last small box from my room-that-was-not-mine-anymore, and heading out the door. I followed her down the steps to the front door, and to the small car, whose trunk was packed with boxes.

When the trunk was closed, Sakura turned to Ino, and smiled bittersweetly. "I guess this is goodbye for a while, then."

"Yeah," she whispered, tears forming in her eyes. I gave her a hug, hanging on for a few seconds, letting her cry onto my shoulder. I was telling myself repeatedly that I wasn't going to cry, but a few tears fell from my eyes. I wasn't supposed to cry, because this was my decision, kind of. But that didn't make it any less sad.

As Ino pulled away, I saw Kiba walking up from the road. Our semi-friendship had been repaired when he defended me to Sasuke the day after 'the incident' had occurred. Sasuke seemed pretty confident that Kiba would just agree with him, but apparently his loyalties to me were a bit tighter. I didn't know they still existed.

Kiba said it was his way of making up for screwing with Shikamaru and I. He said that he really had heard someone say that Shikamaru said that stuff, but he didn't exactly believe the source.

"So, Haruno, you're leaving."

"Yeah."

"And my stupid cousin isn't even here to see you off…"

I kept quiet. Kiba took that as a sign to drop it.

"Well, I'll miss ya," he said, giving me a cocky grin. "School just won't be the same if I don't have you to look at every once in a while."

"Oh, ha ha," I said, rolling my eyes. "You are terrible at goodbyes, Kiba."

He just chuckled. "And don't worry, I'll be there to defend 'your honor' as they say."

"And I'll help him!" Ino chimed in.

"Thanks, guys…" I smiled, giving Kiba a hug. My parents just stood patiently by the car, waiting for me to get done. "Oh, and can you tell Hinata and Chouji goodbye for me? I know I've already told them, but I just want to get it done again."

"Aren't you forgetting someone?" A lazy voice called out from behind me. My heart lept what felt like a foot as I turned around to see Shikamaru standing at the foot of my driveway. He face was straight, and he wasn't smiling or anything, but I was still glad to see him.

"Nah, that about covers it," I said, raising my eyebrow.

"Hn, yeah, I guess it does. You only have about four friends." Subconsciously, I had started walking toward him. Out shouts were becoming quieter now, and his face was starting to show signs of a smirk.

"Oh, but I do remember one friend that I might have forgotten about," I said, biting my lip like I was trying to remember a name. "Who was it again? God, his name is so difficult to pronounce…"

"Does it start with an 'S'?" Shikamaru asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes!" I exclaimed, stopping about 2 feet from him. "Sai!" I turned to Ino, smiling. "Remember to say goodbye to Sai, as well!"

Ino just laughed, but Kiba spoke up. "Sai transferred to a specialty art school a while ago. I'm surprised you didn't notice."

"Aww, so much for your so called friend," Shikamaru said, pulling my attention away from them and back to him. His brown eyes were warm and friendly, and yet again it hit me how strange it was to look up at him.

"Thanks for coming to say goodbye," I said, smiling. But right when I said that, Shikamaru's face went rigid.

"You don't have to leave, you know. Just face this, get it over with."

"I can't stay here, Shikamaru, you know that. I can't take it… The rumors, the lies…"

"But when you were accused of putting me in the hospital, you could stand that?"

I was tempted to say, "But I had someone with me at the time!" but I knew he would only get mad. "It was a different time, Shikamaru. A different situation."

"Because it was about me then, is that it? You don't really care about me?"

My whole body tensed with anger as I narrowed my eyes up at him. "You **know** that's not true. You're my best friend!"

The words 'best friend' seemed to strike him strangely, but a few seconds later, it was gone. "Then why are you leaving now? If you care, why are you leaving me behind?"

"You know exactly why I'm doing this, Shikamaru. You don't need to be so damn stubborn about it!" I think our voices were starting to become louder and louder as we continued the fight that had separated us when he first found out.

"Sakura, honey, we need to get going!" My mother called out, her voice nervous. She must have known that we were fighting again. We must have been louder than I thought.

"Well then, I guess this is goodbye," he said, his face solemn once more.

"Goodbye, Shikamaru."

"Goodbye, Sakura."

He turned and left just as I turned to head back to the car. Kiba wasn't very far behind him, and Ino was waiting for me once again.

"Don't think too much of it, 'Kura. He's just handling your leaving in his on way." She smiled, and with one last, quick hug, she was off as well, probably going to chew Shikamaru's head off for making my 'Going Away!' partyish thing a complete disaster. My parents stood by the car as I climbed in the back seat.

"Sakura…"

"Lets get going. It's a long way to Jiraiya's," I said, and they just got in the car.

Tears were stinging at my eyes as my dad started the car and pulled out of the driveway. They began to fall as we rode through town, the car completely silent.

Why did he have to make me feel so guilty about leaving? I had to… And he was being so ridiculously selfish to want me to stay here. I had to leave.

Right?

The silence stretched on. I was temped to make a comment like 'So much for our family bonding, eh?' but words escaped me. Everything was leaving me now. Or was I leaving everything?

God, who was I kidding myself? Ino was right, she was so right. And I was going to leave without telling him. Not that I'd never see him again, but when if my feelings did change and I never told him? What if we had a meant to be that was ruined?

I wasn't one to believe in One True Love. Ino always had a notion of being swept off her feet until I convinced her in middle school that if it did happen, things might not work out. There had to be more than one person for everyone, because what if that person died? She had begun to see things my way, to a point.

And that's where her 'no one true love for high school girls' theory came from. It was part of the reason she was so comfortable with being a huge flirt. She now thinks that her OTL will be in college.

So what if Shikmaaru had been one of those guys that I could spend my life with and I blew it by being selfish and not wanting to face this?

I was an idiot.

I sat in the backseat, my head leaning up against the window, and I was crying. I watched the trees on the side of the highway roll by, and I decided I was making a mistake.

"Sakura, if it helps, I think you're doing he right thing. Even if Shikamaru doesn't want you too." My mothers voice broke my trance, and I looked at the back of her head. She was turned so she could look at me, and she was smiling.

"A change of scenery will do you good. It's not healthy to get this caught up over things."

She was meaning well, I swear.

"But w-what f I'm making a huge mistake b-by leaving? Shouldn't I face this head on? Won't it make me a stronger person than running will?"

"No… No, this situation isn't one you should try and take on. Sakura, you're a young woman, and you shouldn't be treated like that. No man should ever treat you like a toy, and I don't want my daughter subjected to it any longer," my father said, his voice adding to our conversation.

"A-And Shikamaru?"

"He'll eventually get over it. We've known Shikamaru just as long as you have, dear. If I know one thing, it's that he'll find this grudge to be too 'troublesome' to keep it for too long."

**A/N: So there you have it! My newest I, Sakura chapter. Isn't it amazing. And just for you information, Barack Obama is going to be the next US president. You already knew that? Darnnnnnn. But what you didn't know is that the last words of this chapter have a very significant meaning. You knew that, too? GRRRRR. Anyway, I hope you liked it. I'm trying to update faster, I swear to the Lord Almighty. Reviews give me inspiration, BTW. If you didn't know that. **

**Oh noess…. It's 12:40 and I have school tomorrow. Or… I have school in a few hours. Noooooo. ;.;**


	12. Heal Baby Heal

**A/N: I know, it's been a while. But good news! I've decided to try and update at least 2 more times for this story during my break. Doesn't that sound nice? And if I can't get it all by January 5th, I have another break coming that next week, so it's all good. Enjoy. And review.  
**

It was raining when we finally reached Uncle Jiraiya's house. The drive felt like it had taken weeks, but it lasted only a few hours.

I still felt horrible.

Jiraiya had a huge house, and for only just one man, it seemed like kind of a waste. My mom said that he lived alone ever since the one true love of his life left him, and he was so heartbroken, that he ended up a.) becoming a man-whore, and b.) writing a series from their relationship and making a fortune. When I was young, I used to love to hear the story of the heartbroken man and his one true love, but now it just kind of disgusts me.

I guess I'm just being cynical because of, well, you know. _Him._

Strangely enough, I can't even place which _him _I'm talking about.

"Kokoro!" Jiraiya's voice broke through my thoughts as the front door opened. My mother's face broke into a smile, and she walked forward to give her uncle a hug. "I always said you were too beautiful to be married."

"Uncle," mom said, pulling back. I was sitting inside the car, watching them exchange pleasantries.

"But, if anything, I guess Souta can be considered a good husband."

"You say that every time we see you, Jiraiya," my father said, a smile on his face as he went to pull some bags from the trunk.

"It always applies every time I see you two." He walked over to help my father or something. I fell back into the seat, rolling my eyes. I didn't want to be here, but it was an escape. I wouldn't have to face Sasuke anymore.

_But you also won't be able to see Shikamaru._

Yeah, but then again, he probably hates me for leaving him or quitting or whatever I did wrong. I don't even know what I did, yet he's all upset about it.

Outside the car, I could barely hear Jiraiya talking to dad, probably asking him what was wrong with me. And my dad was probably explaining what happened with Shikamaru, and they were all having a jolly good time…

Whoa, that was weird. I usually don't think British.

I could hear Jiraiya saying something back, and my mom cut in with a worried sounding voice. I could barely make out the words.

"What do you mean, an extra tenant?"

An extra tenant? Was Jiraiya actually keeping one of his girlfriends at the house with him? Had the love of his life finally moved back in? Did he adopt a pet frog or something?

"Well, it was a last minute thing… I figured that she wouldn't mind… Speaking of your daughter, where is she?"

I raised myself up and looked out the back window. Jiraiya was standing next to a big pile of my stuff, looking at my father. I opened the door slowly, and walked out.

"Hey, uncle Jirai-"

"SAKURA-CHAN?!" My ears perked up for a millisecond, and then my eyes grew wide. I knew that voice. I had been in school with that voice for God knows how long. Why was that voice here?

I spun around and came face to face with Naruto Uzumaki, the one person in the world I did not expect to find here. "Sakura-chan! It is you!"

"H-hi, Naruto," I said, still surprised. He looked different, even though I had just seen him in school recent-…

Oh wait. Naruto transferred out while I was still with Sasuke.

That would probably be why I hadn't seen or heard him in a long time.

"So, why are you here at the pervy sage's house?" he asked, smiling.

"I'm going to be staying here for the rest of the year and probably the summer, maybe even next year. You?"

"Oh, I'm living here because the old hag decided that I was too much trouble."

He laughed, and I couldn't help but smile. Even though I didn't exactly love Naruto, I never really had a problem with him. Well, I did when I was younger, but I grew out of it. And now, here he is, making me feel better and all.

"Hey, kid, will you grab some of her boxes while I show my niece to her room? Thanks." Jiraiya grabbed me by the shoulders, and started pushing me toward the house. Naruto just stood back, with a look of stunned awe on his face.

"Sakura is RELATED to you?"

But uncle didn't answer. Instead, he let go of my shoulders, and let me take in the splendor of his house. I'd never been here before; he usually always came to visit us. I had seen the outside, but God, the inside was fabulous.

The opening room was wide with two staircases leading up onto a balcony type thing that looked like it connected two hallways. There also two doors at the back, and two on each side.

He must like the whole symmetry thing.

"The kitchen and terrace are back there," he said, pointing toward the back. "The library and bathroom is on the right, and the living room and basement are over there. The right wing is my side. Naruto sleeps over there as well. You can use one of the bedrooms on the left however you want; you won't have to worry about him bothering you."

I just nodded my head, letting it all sink it. I had an entire wing of a house all to myself. Well, I'm sure that Naruto will be over there, but still. The thought of living here was really starting to take for me.

He turned around, probably to go check up on his other tenant, and I walked up the stairs to pick out my new room. My mom and dad soon followed, making their way to whatever room I picked out. I finally chose a soft pink room with a comfy bed and some other furniture.

My dad set down the boxes he was holding and went to direct Naruto to my room.

My mother stayed behind, smiling. "You seem a little happier now than before we left."

"Yeah, this house is really starting to brighten my mood. It's like a dream house. And I know I won't be bothered by anyone while I'm here. New people, a different school. They don't know me. They won't get upset or care."

"Except for that boy you know." Her brown eyes pierced my green ones.

"Yeah, Naruto. He used to go to my old school. Apparently he transferred while I was with… Well, I've been kind of oblivious all year."

Her smile only grew wider as she put an arm around my shoulders. "You'll do well here, I can feel it. This is a good place for you to be right now, Sakura. You'll get over this."

I just smiled and gave her a hug. "We should get started on these boxes, yeah?" I said, pulling the tape off of the closest one. It was full of all of my computer junk and desk supplies. I just moved the box over to the desk and began to get things set up. More boxes came in as my mother and I continued to work, and pretty soon the room even looked like my old one.

"Well, that's all the boxes, Sakura. We've got to get going to get home in good time." My dad looked from the darkening outside to his watch, and I knew that he didn't really want to leave his baby girl behind at some pervert's house for who knows how long.

"Oh, don't be silly, Souta. Stay for dinner and the night," Jiraiya said, grinning. "It gets boring only have the kid here all the time."

"Now, Uncle, we don't want to stay here and then decide that Sakura is better off being homeschooled," my mother stated. He eyes looked watery, but I knew that she was right. They were liable to change their minds at any second.

My parents moved forward, looking at me. Neither of them were fully crying, but I could tell that my mother was on the verge of doing so. I, on the other hand, was about to begin bawling like a newborn.

"This is goodbye, honey," my mom said, giving me another hug. My dad put his arms around the both of us.

"We're only a call away if you need us. And Jiraiya's right here. We love you."

"We love you so much."

"I love you guys, too," I responded. "Bye mama, bye daddy."

They hung onto me for just a second longer, and then it was gone. They let go, and I let go, and they left. I walked with them down to the front foyer, and they got into the car and drove away. That was it. No going back. No more old life of Sasuke and Shikamaru.

_Shikamaru._

His name made my spine tingle, but all I could see was the looked of disappointment and pain that had been etched onto his face when I was leaving. I could almost hear the anger seething into his words, into his lazy voice.

_You don't really care about me?_

The weird part of that was, I wanted to yell at him that I did care. I cared more than he could ever know.

Oh, but who was I kidding, I was over my Shikamaru crush. It had ended the day that the stuff with Sasuke began. Yeah, that's it. I turned around, ready to head back up to my room and finish making it mine. I saw Naruto's blonde hair poking out from the right wing, and his eyes grew wide as I focused in on him.

"Naruto, what are you doing?"

"I was watching you say goodbye to your parents. Is that woman really Jiraiya's niece?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, but she's adopted."

"Oh. Well, he must really like her to let you stay here, then. He never really lets anyone come into his house unless he really likes them, or so I've noticed."

"My mom was always really close to uncle Jiraiya. And he always liked me. But if that's true, why are you here? You said Tsunade-sama asked him to take you in."

"Yeah. And?"

"Why'd he accept?"

Naruto grinned, and finally came out so I could see his entire body. He slid his hands behind his head. "She was always his one true love, but she never really liked him back. Or at least, she never told him she liked him. But he can't say no to her. Kind of like you, Sakura-chan."

I suddenly felt incredibly guilty for seeing Shikamaru in my minds eye when Naruto took that stance. If Naruto really felt that way about me, and I was just ignoring him…

Would we really turn out like Tsunade-sama and Jiraiya? I don't want to cause anyone that much pain.

_Why are you leaving me behind?_

Oh, too late for the no pain thing. His whole attitude today just screamed 'You've hurt me,' and 'I hate you.' I felt so horrible about it, and yet I had no idea why. Why was my leaving making him so mad?! Why couldn't he just accept it, or support me?

Why is he the one in pain? He didn't have to suffer through it all!

"Sakura? Oy, Sakura!" I snapped back to reality, and looked up at Naruto.

"H-huh?" I stumbled, feeling shaky.

"You look like you are about to cry. Are you okay?" In a few seconds, he had bounded down the stairs and was standing next to me. His blue eyes were full of sympathy, and I couldn't help but be calmed by them. They were so peaceful. His hands were so warm.

"Yeah. I… it was just memories."

His soft gaze hardened somewhat. "Oh. Sasuke. That bastard."

"I thought you were friends?" I asked, confusion coloring my tone.

"After what he did to you? And to all those other girls? He's a bastard, plain and simple. He didn't used to be that way, but he is now. I can't believe that he did that to you, of all people. If I had been there, I would have killed him for you."

I couldn't help but smile once more at the nice thought. It was weird to know that he cared so much about me, especially since I had never really shown an interest in him.

_And you already like someone, remember?_

But then again, said person hates me.

And I do NOT like Shikamaru. Why do I keep thinking I do?

"Sakura?"

Yet again, his voice broke through my own thoughts. He had a knack for getting me out of my own head when I needed it the most.

"Hey, Naruto, I think I'm going to my room. It's been a long day."

"Do you want me to walk you up there? You look like you're ready to break."

"Yeah, sure," I responded, almost glad to have some company to keep myself away from thoughts of a certain Nara. Oh, geeze…

I was stuck on Shikamaru again…

Then, Naruto grinned. His smile sent a strange wave throughout my body, and my world went fuzzy for a second. All the thoughts of Shikamaru were washed out of my mind as I marveled in the happy grin adorning his face. As we walked up the stairs and to my room, I couldn't help but feel that my mom was right when she said that this was a good place for me to be. This was a place that I needed to be.

I couldn't help but feel that Naruto was going to be the one that helped me get over Sasuke, and even Shikamaru.

When we finally made it to my room, I gave him a small hug. "Thanks, Naruto."

"What for?"

"Being a friend."

And I meant it.

**A/N: I don't even know if this chapter makes sense. I'm so tired. And if it doesn't, I'm very soory. I don't mean for it to suck. It just comes out that way sometimes. Trust me, this whole Naruto/Sakura thing won't last too long. I don't know if I can take it too much longer. And I know that everyone is waiting for ShikaSaku, which WILL be happening. And because I realize that this story really has nothing to do with ShikaSaku, I think I might add a hapter or two of pure fluff. Or write another one shot. Or both things. Because that would rock. Now, if you'll excuse me, I feel the need to pass out. Sincerely, Rai Lockhart.**


	13. Nothing Compares To

**A/N: My second of hopefully three updates before winter break is over. I'm trying to make up for a fricken month of no word from me whatsoever, so I hope you'll accept this token of love from me. New chapter for I, Sakura. I hope you enjoy. I know that I enjoyed writing it. Read and REVIEW please. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I don't own the characters. I make no money off of this. This is purely fiction, fan fiction to be exact. Just thought I'd disclaim my story again.  
**

It had been a few months since I had first arrived at uncle Jiraiya's. Life had gone on, and old wounds that had the name _Sasuke _etched all over them had begun to heal.

Other wounds, mainly ones involving another dark haired boy that I once knew, still hadn't really cleared. The scars had yet to form completely, so the wounds continued to plague my mind. **He** continued to plague my mind.

I hadn't seen Shikamaru or heard from Shikamaru or even talked to Ino about Shikamaru since that day, and it was tearing me up on the inside.

But on the outside, I was calm, controlled, happy.

"Sakura-channn… Summer's almost over and you have yet to come with me to visit Konoha. Ino's been up here a billion times, why won't you go down there?" Naruto popped his blonde head into my room, pouting slightly and glaring at me with his sapphire eyes.

I just sighed, looking at him. "I have my reasons for not going down there, Naruto. You know I do. And don't even kid me, you know you love it when Ino just _has_ to come and visit me."

At this, the Uzumaki orphan tinged red, and he rubbed the back of his head nervously as he walked completely into my room. I shut the book I was reading and set it down.

"You don't have to pick on me about it, Sakura-chan…"

"Aww, but my little Naruto has a crush on Ino; how could I _not_ pick on you about it? I mean, really… What do you expect me to do, let you live it down?"

He rolled his eyes. "I wish you would." And then, like always, he brightened and grinned happily. "But she could never replace the love I have in my heart for you, Sakura!"

I snorted, and his eyes narrowed in my direction. "Don't even make me laugh, Naruto."

"What, you don't think I'm in love with you?"

I just grinned, and scooted off my bed, grabbing the book that I had been reading and walking up to him. He now towered over me, but I didn't care. "Alright, Naruto, what do you want?"

He grinned sheepishly. Since I had come here, Naruto and I had become incredible friends. It made me wonder how I had managed to ignore him all those years. I mean, we just clicked in a way that I hadn't experienced since Ino or Shika…

I mean, since Ino.

My mind turned dark and stormy again as I remembered him at Karin's party, standing there, yelling at me. His usually warm brown eyes had gone cold, and I couldn't stand it. And then I saw that same coldness reflecting from his eyes the day I last saw him.

"Sakura… Don't," Naruto said, jolting me back to reality. "Don't think of him."

I bit my lip, and then turned a happy gaze back to Naruto. "You never did tell me why you came to bother me when I was reading, Naru-channnnnnnn."

But he wasn't smiling anymore, and I guess he realized that I was faking once more. "Sakura, if you need to talk, I swear I'll listen. You know I will. You can't keep on letting this crap go on, especially if all you'll tell me is "Don't worry about it, Naruto." I can't stand it when you shut me out."

"Don't worry about it, Naruto," I said, turning my back on him and walking toward the main entrance of the house. But he grabbed me hand, and pulled just hard enough to keep me in place. I struggled to drag my hand out of his iron grip, but it wouldn't work.

"I told you I didn't like that. Just… tell me what's wrong, Sakura."

"And what makes you think you have a right to know?" I asked coldly, still staring straight ahead. I had found out that if I didn't want to talk to something, usually a bitchy attitude made him drop it.

"You've told me everything else over the course of the months you've been living here. You've told me all about you and Sasuke, you and Ino, you and Karin. Yet I've never heard one word out of you about Shikamaru! I know that something happened between you two. You've told me that much. But I want to know what."

"Why the sudden interest in Shikamaru?" I asked, turning to face him finally.

I expected to find him glaring at me, but instead, he was looking kind of shocked. "You mean, you don't know?"

"Know what?"

"Ino didn't tell you?"

"We don't talk about _him._ Tell me, what don't I know?"

"No."

I could imagine a million things happening, all revolving around Shikamaru. I saw his dead body. I saw a mangled car, with blood dripping down his face. I saw him, in a coma. I saw him in the hospital again. I saw his mother crying. I saw his dad holding onto her, his expression dim. I saw Ino and Chouji standing near him as he took his final breaths. I saw my mother doing her best to heal him with what little she had. I saw Ino standing near a phone, calling, but only getting Naruto. I saw her breaking into tears as well.

I saw him with a new girlfriend, pregnant. I saw his parents, angry and frustrated at his stupidity. I saw him not caring. I saw him throwing away everything he had actually worked for in exchange for alcoholism or drugs. I saw tattoos and piercings where sharp things shouldn't go. I imagined him making death threats toward me. I imagined him killing Sasuke out of spite and in prison. I imagined him in a cell, sleeping the day away.

"Naruto, what happened?"

"Tell me what went on between you two, and I will."

I weighed the options in my mind. Could my worry and fear outweigh the emotional pain he brought? Could anything really change the way I was feeling about him now?

I swallowed, hard, and then stared at the ground. "F-Fine. I'll tell you."

I started walking away, but Naruto's strong grip kept me from going very far. "Where are you going?" I held out the book I was carrying, and shook it slightly.

"To the library. This isn't the type of story I want to be standing up for."

He let out a soft 'Oh' and followed me to the library. We walked in silence, as I was trying desperately to figure out what to tell Naruto. I wasn't exactly clear on what had happened myself, so it was kind of really hard.

We reached the library of Jiraiya's house much, much too quickly, and I felt like running back out and having Naruto chase me just to give myself some more time to think. But I didn't, and we walked into the giant room.

The room was filled with different books of every genre you could ever think of. Once, I asked Jiraiya why he had so many books, and he said it was the mark of a good writer to read a lot. He also said it was a good reference and he hated going to the public library, so he just started one himself. I figured it was a good enough reason for a rich guy.

We sat down at the conference table like thing that was in the room, and he stared at me.

"So?"

I sighed. "It started back toward the beginning of sophomore year, I guess. I had heard he said some stuff about me, and it kind of pissed me off. That's when all the stuff with Sasuke started blowing up."

"I remember that. Shikamaru was pretty upset for a long time."

"Yeah, so I was told. Then, he and I got in a fight at Karin's party…" The more I remembered about all of our fights, the more the pain poured into my voice. "He got injured. You remember that too, right?"

Naruto didn't say a word, but he just nodded.

"Well, after that, we were solid again. He was my rock; I could count on him for everything. He would never go away. But then, Sasuke decided to attack. And I couldn't take it. He had won."

My throat became dry as I thought of the day that Sasuke started the cheating rumors about me. I remember all the tears, and then I remember Shikamaru. I remember him holding me. I remember him stroking my hair, and I could feel the warmth he had given off. My entire body longed to hold him again, and I felt the everlasting ache in my chest intensify.

"So, my parents decided I was going to move. And I agreed, more than ready to get away. But Shikamaru… He didn't like the thought of me moving, apparently. So we founght. And it hurt. A lot. He hates me now. I could see it in his eyes, a-and hear i-it in h-his v-v-voice. And then, h-he had the n-nerve to say t-that I d-didn't c-care about him, when I do! I really, really do!"

I had begun to cry again, thinking of the feelings that he had left me with.

"Did you ever tell him that?" A voice, which was definitely not Naruto's, spoke out. I looked up, unaware that Jiraiya had been in the room the whole time.

"N-No…" I said, still looking at him.

He just frowned, and looked over at Naruto. "So, have you told her yet?"

Naruto just shrugged. "No. I made her talk about it first. And then she started crying, and now I don't know what to do…"

"Useless kid you are."

"HEY! I RESENT THAT!"

"Oh, Naruto knows how to use a big word like resent now!" Jiraiya mocked. They were like this all the time.

"Hey. Guys. GUYS!" I yelled, letting their attention settle on me. Naruto and Jiraiya looked a little shocked at my outburst, because I usually just let them argue and slip away to my room. "What were you going to tell me?"

"Oh, yeah…" Naruto said, finally remembering that he needed to tell me something. A look of sadness crossed over his face as he looked into my eyes. "Ino called."

"And?"

"Well… Apparently, she was with Shikamaru and Chouji, and Chouji asked about you. Without even thinking about it, she started talking about how you had adjusted so well to life up here and you would say that you felt more at home here than you sometimes did with your parents. She said that you had made a few new friends, meaning Sai and me, but I guess Shikamaru didn't see it that way.

"Ino said that right after she finished telling Chouji about you, she realized her mistake, but Shikamaru was already looking pretty depressed again. She said that he's been pretty down since you left, but she hasn't seen him this bad off since the first week you were gone."

He stopped, and looked at me.

"So? That's it? He got depressed over me?"

The blonde boy took a deep breath, and turned his gaze to the wall instead of me. "Not exactly…"

"What do you mean, not exactly?! Naruto, what happened to Shikamaru?" I asked, my voice drenched in more worry than should be humanly possible.

"He's gone."

"WHAT?"

Naruto shifted uncomfortable under my credulous stare, and he sighed. "Ino said that he left. He just left. He's been gone for like, a week and a half now, or actually… probably two weeks, since I've waited a bit to tell you, but he just disappeared."

"And his parents? They're worried, right? The police are out looking for him?" They had to be, right? They wouldn't just let Shikamaru go, would they?

"Um, no. He calls his parents once a day to make sure they know where he is. But he won't answer calls from anyone else. Not her or Chouji… Only his parents. According to Ino, his dad told her dad that it was a journey his son had to take at one point or another, considering all that's happened, and while they wish he was there, they're glad to know he's safe."

"They let him GO? What kind of reasoning is THAT? And how do we know Ino's such a reliable source, huh? I mean, this could all be a lie!"

"Sakura, she sounded pretty worried. And you know Shikamaru, he can take care of himself. He's strong and smart. He'll be fine."

But I wasn't listening. "He could be dead. He could be halfway around the world by now. He could be sleeping with a harem of women. He could be _dead_," I kept mumbling to myself, crying.

All I could think about was his lifeless body.

"It never fails to amaze me how much like her you are, Sakura," Jiraiya said offhandedly. I looked up at him, ears streaming down my face, worry caressing my every thought. "This is way too familiar," he said, a small grin on his face.

"What are you even talking about, ya old pervert?" Naruto asked.

"She never fails to remind me of Tsunade," Jiraiya said, shaking his head.

My mind flashed back to my old principal. I knew that she knew Jiraiya at one point, but I had no idea what he was talking about.

Suddenly, I remember Naruto saying, when I had first come here, that Tsunade was his one true love, the one he had always pined after.

"How do I remind you of…?" I asked quietly.

"How do you remind me of her? Well, you two have the same tempers. The same inhuman strength. The same charm and the same type of draw for men. It's not that you're necessarily beautiful in a model type of way, but you've got the kind of beauty that just mixes with a personality that draw people to you. Even when you don't want them there."

I stared at him, confused. Where was he going with this?

"But none of that applies to this situation as it stands. What reminds me of her is you and this boy. This Shikamaru, the one you care so much about but never told him. And now you're here, falling apart with worry and emotions. Just like she's done before. I was in the same place as Naruto when it happened with her.

"His name was Dan. He was the first man that had ever really noticed Tsuande for more than her body when she was going through college. He noticed her working her ass off to become a doctor, and he noticed that she was brilliant. She was the top of her class, and she had ideas that were so ingenious that people should have stopped and listened. But no one did. Except for Dan. He heard her taking to her professor one day about how there should be nurses at every school in the country to make sure that the children remain safe and secure. But the professor just blew her off as an idealist, saying that no one would ever want to deal with kids all day except teachers.

"But Dan agreed with her. He said that it would be more beneficial to the school systems if they had nurses at every school to take care of the kids. The old man just told him what he had told Tsunade. Dan and Tsunade left the office together, and she asked him why he cared so much about this. He said that his little sister had gotten hurt at school, and had ended up dying before an ambulance could come and get her. He said that if a nurse had been at the school, she could have lived. Tsunade was stunned into silence, but she always said that she never forgot that conversation. She always said that she wanted to reach out and tell him that her brother had been killed in a car accident. That they had something in common, but she didn't.

"As time went on, she saw more and more of Dan. They worked on homework together. They went to dinner together. She recommended books and things for him to read, and she said that he taught her everything she knows about drinking. Of course, back then, she wasn't an alcoholic, and neither was he. They were two people who were great friends. Tsunade found herself slowly falling in love with Dan, but every time she went to tell him that, she never could She'd get distracted or something would happen.

"Well, one day, he got in a car accident. Tsunade just happened to be working as the EMT on the ambulance that came to the scene. When she saw him there, blood splashed all over his face, she said that her heart stopped. She did everything she could, but nothing was enough. He died that night. She never told him that she loved him. From that day on, she has always hated blood, and gave up her life as a doctor, instead becoming a teacher and a principal. She raised his niece in his stead, and lived her life.

"But I know that a part of her can never move on from that. She'll always love him, even if she doesn't want to. Even if she wants to be with someone else. She'll always have a place in her heart for Dan."

Naruto and I just sat, shocked, letting it all sink in. I could tell by the bitterness in his tone that Jiraiya was the one whom she wanted to be with, but couldn't bear to love because of Dan. But I wasn't focusing on that.

I was focusing on the parallels from my own life. Shikamaru…

What if he did die while out on this journey he just has to take?

What if I never saw him again, never told him that I cared about him. That I liked him. That I… I…

What if I could never tell him any of this?

I could feel the tears start back up, but I wasn't aware of them. All I could feel was the worry and the pain. Naruto had grabbed my hand and begun to squeeze it gently, as if trying to keep me conscious of this world, but it wasn't working.

I was in a daze.

What if something happened to him?!

"Shikamaru…!" I mumbled, balling up the fist that wasn't in Naruto's care.

We sat there for a while, all of us. Jiraiya looked like he had done something wrong, and soon left. Naruto stayed by my side, telling me that it would all be okay. I didn't believe him, but it was nice to be reassured.

While he was talking, I could hear Shikamaru, in he back of my mind, telling me the same thing.

_"Everything will be fine, I promise. Everything will be fine, I'll make it all fine."_

His voice, sounding so sweet and loving, was making me cry again. Or, rather, cry even harder than I had been.

_"Don't worry."_

How could I not worry! I thought to the Shikamaru-in-my-head. You could be dead…

_"It'll be okay. Everything will be okay."_

The doorbell rang, pulling me from my thoughts and making his voice go away. Naruto stood halfway up, but I stopped him.

"I'll get it," I said lifelessly, not looking into his eyes.

"No, Sakura, you stay-" He protested, but I cut him off.

"I said, I'll get it." My voice held much more conviction this time, and He let me walk to the door. I didn't even bother erasing the traces of my tears from my face. I didn't even think about it.

I hurried to the front door, and opened it. It was raining outside, I noted. I hadn't even noticed.

And then, I saw him. He was drenched, soaked to the bone, and dripping with rain water. I wondered, in a small part of my brain, if he had walked. Probably not, that small part thought. It's just raining really hard outside.

But most of my brain was focused on the man in front of me. He had changed so much in so little time.

"Sakura," he said, his voice an octave lower that I remembered. I just stood there, door open, mouth probably hanging down, staring. "Sakura, please… come home?"

**A/N: I hope you enjoyed it. It's a cliffhanger, just what the doctor ordered from me for you. I really, really, really like this chapter. I think it's much better than my last one. And the end makes me happy inside. I enjoyed re-reading the last parts of my ninth chapter for a good inspiration for this one. Well, I already had the plan for this chapter, I just had to get it written out. So yeah. I really hope you like it, again. Sorry for any mistakes, grammatically or spelling-wise. It's 2:19 in the morning, so I hope you'll forgive me. It's also so ridiculously hot in my room. It's like my computer generated enough heat to melt an ice cap and then some. Not to mention it's really hot outside, too, so opening a window doesn't help. Why in the world is it 70 some degrees in DECEMBER?! Wahhhhh!  
**

**Review, pretty please? -Rai  
**


	14. For Being Away

**A/N: Like I said, three updates before winter break is over. Heck, I mgiht even update a fourth time if I can fit it in. So, Happy New Years! My last story update of 2008, coming at you. **

**Read and review, like always. -heart heart-**

"Sakura, please… come home?"

I looked into his face, seeing someone that I've known for so long. "Kiba," I said, knitting my eyes together, confused.

"You're the only one… Look, it's been disastrous without you."

He had changed, in every sense of the word. He was taller now, I could tell just by looking at him. But then again, everyone I knew seemed to be taller than me, save for Ino. His shaggy brown hair had grown out since the last time I saw it, and I was surprised that he could still see. It looked like his teeth had somehow gotten sharper, and he looked a lot more muscular than I remembered. His hair was dripping wet and it almost covered his eyes completely.

But what struck me as most different was the look in his dark eyes. He looked worried and nervous, like something really wrong had happened. And I guess, something really wrong had happened.

"He's gone, Sakura, and we don't know where he is. I know you think I don't care, but hell. We're family. Distantly connected, but still. If he doesn't come back like people say, then I won't have anyone to talk to at those damn reunions. And Ino is falling apart, too. I mean, she might not show it, but you were really her rock, you know? Even Hinata is off without you, and I can't stand to see her like that. I know that she misses talking to you, and you won't come back, and now Shikamaru's gone, and it's just like icing on the cake. Sakura… please?"

I just stood there, taking it all in. He was worried. About so many people. So many people I had affected.

"Kiba…" I said again, just staring. He looked back at me, staring me in the eyes.

Naruto must have poked his head into the room, because Kiba looked up, looked back at me, and then did a double take. I could see the shock in his face as he must have been staring at the blond behind me.

"Yo, Kiba!" Naruto said, most likely grinning.

"Hey, Naruto," Kiba said back, still semi-shocked to see the number one hyperactive kid in the place I was staying.

"Get in here! I bet you're freezing and wet. Geeze, Sakura, just let the poor kid stand in the rain why doncha?"

I moved aside, ushering Kiba inside and taking off his rain soaked coat. He walked over to Naruto, who had asked one of the cooks to get something warm for Kiba, and a maid had run off to find a blanket or something. He sat on one couch, and Naruto and I sat on the opposite couch, looking at him.

"So, err, Kiba, what brings you here?" Naruto asked, looking between my blank stare and his slight glare.

"She," he said, pointing at me, "needs to come home."

"Ah."

We sat in silence for a bit, Kiba still glaring at me. Naruto was sensing something again, and I could tell that his over-protective side kicked in.

"Hey, Kiba, stop that. Stop glaring at her," he said, his voice drenched in authority. I placed my hands on my knees, and stared pointedly at the ground.

But I could still feel his eyes on my, accusatory. "So, this is it, huh?"

I continued to stare at the ground.

The cook brought out warm drinks, offering one to everyone. Kiba and Naruto accepted, and started drinking heartily. I accepted, but only because the cook had gone through so much trouble, and placed the drink on the table.

"You know, he has this picture of you. It was taken sometime this year, probably by Ino. Maybe he even took it himself. But you're sitting on the railing of your back porch, watching the sunset, and your face is illuminated. You look beautiful, Sakura." I couldn't tell where Kiba was going with this, but I knew that picture.

I remembered that day. Ino had gotten a new camera, and was trying it out. I hadn't been paying attention to her at the time, and then she took it. Ino has always been obsessed with photographing people when they aren't posing, because she says it bring emotion and character into the photo that just isn't there with a pose picture.

I had to admit, it was a good picture.

Naruto stiffened beside me, and I knew that he was basically asking Kiba where he was going with this.

"Don't worry, Uzumaki, I'm not here to be hitting on Sakura. I already have a girlfriend."

My eyes shot up, piercing his own dark ones. He seemed taken aback, very slightly, at my gesture.

'_Even Hinata is off without her, and I can't stand to see her like that.'_

"You better not be taking ANY kind of advantage of that girl," I hissed, putting the puzzle together.

He glared right back at me, his jaw clenched tight. "I would never do that to her. But you're one to talk… Think of what you've done to Shikamaru."

My expression changed from accusatory to stunned, and I felt like someone had pushed me back a good half a foot. My mouth opened slightly, and I just sat there. Stunned. Shocked. Lost. **(A/N: I'm startled. Are you startled? -Giant hamster appears, but the pan flute bands save the day- To anyone who gets the reference, you win. xDD)**

"Here you are, with Naruto. He's held on to you! He still cares! And yet, here you are. Just another Sasuke situation-"

"Don't you even PRETEND to have been Shikamaru's friend when Sasuke was in the picture," I growled, narrowing my eyes and forgetting my stunned-ness.

"Then don't you pretend that you actually care about him!" Kiba stood up, and walked over to where I was sitting.

Naruto stepped in once more, putting his body between the Inuzuka and me.

"Even got your little boyfriend fighting your battles now, huh? Geeze, poor Shikamaru. He cared too much about you. Should have forgotten you when he had the chance."

"She cares about him," Naruto said. "She cares about him more than she cares about me."

"Oh, don't even bullshit me, Naruto. Don't defend her."

"You're sounding a lot like Sasuke right now, Kiba," I said sourly.

The dog lover just sent a chilly stare in my direction, but he didn't say a word, nor did he sit down. He just glared at me.

"Why are you defending her, anyway, Uzumaki? Because you two are in love?"

Naruto's expression hardened. "No. I'm defending her because she's my friend, and that's what friends do. Friends don't come in here, making assumptions about someone because they're gone. Friends don't automatically assume that other friends don't give a shit; because they weren't there to hear her cry every night she woke up dreaming of him. Which she did, often. Friends will wait to hear her side of the story, wait to hear her tell them that sometimes when she looked at me, all she could see was him."

My cheeks burned red as I listened to Naruto tell Kiba about all the things I had just assumed he ignored or didn't see.

"I've seen her resist the urge to break down in a new school when she met the top of the class. I've seen her turn down offers from a lot of guys. I've seen her stare at his photographs. I've heard her ask Sai to draw a quick sketch of this guy she used to know. I've seen her refuse to eat a food because it reminds her of him. I've seen her read a book she hates by an author she detests and smile, because it was one of his favorites. I haven't heard her say a word about him since she got here, until tonight. I just saw her cry her eyes out, thinking that he could die."

My mind was skimming over all the memories he brought up; most of them were painful. Like the most recent one; here we were, arguing, and Shikamaru could be dead.

"Sakura…" Kiba said, looking from Naruto to me and back again. "I… I didn't… I mean, I just thought because you wouldn't see him that… But you were just as bad off as he was. Figures," Kiba said, a grin playing on his surprisingly handsome features. "You two are exactly alike in the strangest of ways."

"Yeah, well, this should teach you not to assume," Naruto said, tone still cool.

"Whatever, Uzumaki."

Kiba looked at me, and went to sit back down. Naruto sat back down, as well, but kept a keen eye on Kiba. I looked over at him. He was less agitated now, but I could still see hints of worry all over him.

"What do you want, Kiba?" I asked warily, looking him in the eye.

"Remember how I said that there was the photograph of you? The really, really good one?"

"Yeah…?"

"Well, Shikamaru was the one who has the photograph. I hadn't ever seen it until the day he left. See, I saw him before he decided to go on this little journey. He was in his driveway, standin' outside his car with a bag on top of it, and he was looking at something. So I called out to him, right? And he looked up, blushing a bit, and I got curious. I walked over to him, and that's when I saw it. He tried to hide it, but I took it from him and looked at it, and he looked away from me. 'Go ahead. I'm not going to need it where I'm going.' Which is why I came, Sakura. I think he's around here somewhere. I think he's coming to see you. Why else would he say that, huh? So we need to go find him."

"And how am I supposed to help you with your search, Kiba? It's not like I have some magical Shikamaru sensor shoved in my brain," I said, crossing my arms across my chest and looking toward the door.

All the while, my mind was rushing, jumping, flying to new heights. A picture of me? Blush? Hell, that was the best news I'd heard all day. Of course, the only other news I had heard today consisted of Naruto telling me that Shikamaru had run away and Jiraiya telling me a depressing story.

"But that's just it, Sakura. I think you do. You always have the best sense of where he is. Even better than Chouji. It's like your mind can just lock onto his brainwaves or something."

"That is possibly the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard, Kiba," I said, rolling my eyes a bit.

A Shikamaru sense? Geeze, I'm not some superhero.

_But you do seem to know where I am all the time. Remember at that party, when you didn't take your eyes of Tayuya because you sensed something? Or when you found me in that crowd at school every day. Or when we were little, and we'd play hide and go seek, and you'd always find me._

The Shikamaru-in-my-head seemed pretty intent on making me feel like I actually had this so-called sense. It also seemed pretty intent on making me go.

"Sakura, comeon… Don't be like that. It's worth the try…"

_I could be dead._

"I'll do it," I said suddenly, looking Kiba straight in the eye. His mouth dropped open a slight bit as he became incredibly confused.

Naruto was staring at me, too, sputtering. "B-b-b-ba-b-buh…"

"What, Naruto?"

"It's RAINING! And you can't just go out on a rainy night with some dog loving pimp! And you were just opposed to the idea! What's wrong with you today, anyway?"

'_Geeze, the troublesome caretaker is getting on my nerves. What an idiot…'_ the Shikamaru-in-my-head complained, putting a hand to his forehead and waving Naruto off.

But Kiba didn't question my resolve; in fact, his confusion turned into a dead on grin. "Good, I knew you'd help me. And I am not a pimp, Naruto; I have a girlfriend, remember?" His angry eyes were turned on the blonde sensation, who immediately jumped away, scared as I turned on him also.

"Yeah, and we don't want to be calling Kiba a pimp when he's with someone as sweet as Hinata," I said, an angry gleam in my eye.

"FINE FINE I GIVE IN. Just go with him and don't kill me, either of you," Naruto said, already at the top of the stairs.

Kiba looked from the place that Naruto just was to where he was now, and then looked at me. "How did…?"

"I don't know. He just does that sometimes. It's like he's a superfast ninja or something." I shrugged, and then looked back at the door. "So are we going or are we going to sit here?" I asked, my voice thick with excitement and worry.

"Right, let's go," he said, coming over and pulling me up.

We walked toward the door, and Kiba got his coat, watching me as I walked outside into the cold night air.

"Hey, Sakura," someone said, drawing my attention back into the house. Jiraiya was standing there with a very warm looking coat of mine. "You're going to need this if you're going to do what she couldn't tonight," he said, a grin on his face. I nodded, and he threw me the coat.

"Do what she couldn't… Sakura, what in the world is he talking about?"

"Nothing, it's nothing," I told him as I caught the coat and slipped it on. "Ready?"

"Yeah," Kiba responded. "Let's go find us a lazy genius."

We set out walking toward the driveway, and my entire body was anticipating seeing Shikamaru again. Would he look the same as the one in my head does? Well, I guess he would have changed, but was it drastic? Did he have a tattoo? A scar? Maybe he cut his hair or something.

I noticed, quickly enough, that Kiba wasn't stopping to get in a car or pulling out any keys or anything of the sort.

"Kiba, where is your car?"

"I don't have one…" He said, looking back at me. "My parents weren't going to get me a car, since me sister lives close enough and she lets me drive hers. But she needed it tonight because she was going to check on a patient."

"So you walked all the way here?"

"No, are you crazy?! Who would walk here when it takes at least three hours to get here by car?! I rode the bus, and walked from the bus stop."

My eye began to twitch. "You know, if you had asked, I could have got Naruto to take us."

"Eh, it's only a fifteen minute walk from here to town. And the town isn't that big, you know. So I'm sure that in no time, we'll have found Shikamaru, and then he can take us to Jiraiya's house. I've got it all planned out, you'll see," he said, a signature confident smirk on his face.

"And what if he doesn't want to see me, Kiba? What if… What if he refuses to take me home, and then you two leave? It's raining outside and I don't know the way from town to Jiraiya's house," I mumbled, staring at the ground.

Kiba stopped, waited for me to catch up with him, and then wrapped his arm around my shoulder. "I wouldn't leave you out there. If he wasn't going to take both of us, he's not going to take either of us. Anyway, I highly doubt he'd leave you, Sakura. The kid adores you."

He pulled the hood up over my hair, which was admittedly getting very, very wet, and then we trudged on in a comfortable silence. Well, as comfortable a silence as we could scrounge up on a pouring night walking on slippery asphalt.

Around 15 minutes later, the neon sign of a ramen shop, a brothel, and a liquor store greeted us.

"Your uncle sure picked a weird place to live."

"He likes women, alcohol, and food. He's a freak, I never denied that," I said, looking around at all the other shops coming into view as we walked into the hard to see town.

We walked down street after street, running into only a few people on our way. I didn't feel safe walking around here, just the two of us, because this town had a bad reputation on Friday nights for having drunk people near bars. I guess Jiraiya thought Kiba would be a good enough escort, but I wasn't convinced.

"'Ey there, girlie. You got an odd shade o' hair. Didja dye it, or were ya born with it?" I felt myself stiffen as I heard the voice of some drunk guy behind us. Kiba turned, growling slightly. "Oy, shut the dog up an' come wiff me, eh Pinky?"

"She's not coming with you," Kiba said. I started to feel kind of like I was in a bad teen novel, and I was determined not to do what the main character always did, and try to pick a fight. So, I ran.

"Hey, Sakura, where are you going?!" Kiba yelled after me as he took off as well. The good thing about seriously drunk people is they have a habit of passing out drunk, so we didn't have much to worry about him following us.

"Getting away from the bar!" I yelled, still running. The rain was falling directly into my face, and I was squinting to keep my grip on reality.

Kiba caught up with me, and we ran down some back streets, coming up at an abandoned warehouse.

"Oh yay. Now all we need is a creepy noise, and we're all set to be the victims of a horror movie," Kiba said sarcastically.

"You're the one that decided not to bring a car," I said, glaring at him. But my glare brought something into view that made my heart stop. I recognized it. It was more familiar to me than a lot of other cars. Hey, besides my parents cars, it probably was the most familiar car to me.

"I already told you—Hey, Sakura, where are you going now?!" Kiba said as I ran toward Shikamaru's car. I stopped about 20 feet away, still staring. Kiba was suddenly next to me again, looking at the thing, as well. "Oh," he said simply, recognizing Shikamaru's car. "So… are we going?"

I was split in half by his question. One side of me wanted to go up and see Shikamaru. The other side of me wanted to run back to the drunk guy or Jiraiya's house. Anywhere but here, with a guy that hates me.

Kiba grabbed my arm and pulled me forward, and slowly we made our way to the car. Slowly, we got there. "You go on first," Kiba said, pushing me forward.

"But I don't want-" I protested, but my eye caught Shikamaru, lying down in the backseat of his car.

I felt my entire body burn and my heart froze for a second before leaping up about 10 feet in the air.

He looked different; that was for sure. His hair was out of its usual ponytail, and it was lying haphazardly around his face. His jaw had become much more pronounced and manly looking since I had last seen him. He looked very similar to his dad. I could see the two earrings that he always wore still in his ears, and he looked so peaceful, sleeping.

"Oh, comeon, the kid didn't even have the decency to wear a shirt," Kiba said, looking in on him, as well. But I didn't mind. I never really remembered Shikamaru as being muscular, but he was. Not overbearingly so, but enough to get my heart racing faster and faster as my eyes travelled up his torso.

I felt quite inadequate looking even being near this god-like man.

"Yeah, well, I don't think he expected visitors," I pointed out, looking over at Kiba.

"Still, it's a public place! Anyone could be looking in on him if the wandered back here; what the hell was he thinking?!"

"I don't know, I'm not a mind reader," I countered. We were in full arguing mode right now, completely oblivious to all that was happening around us. Such as, oh you know, Shikamaru getting up, putting on a shirt, and coming out.

"Your troublesome arguing woke me up," a lazy voice announced, interrupting our argument.

Kiba and I both turned to look at the now fully clothed and not-asleep Nara, embarrassment rightfully taking over our features.

"Hey, there, Shikamaru," Kiba said, grinning nervously and scratching the back of his head. "Nice to see you here and all. What a coincidence, right? I mean… heh…"

But Shikamaru wasn't looking at Kiba. He was looking straight at me. I felt fear overtake me as his eyes narrowed. "What are you doing here, Sakura?"

"I…I… Kiba… he…" I stumbled, looking away from Shikamaru and toward the abandoned building.

"She came here to talk to you, and get you to come back home," Kiba said, letting Shikamaru's eyes be drawn to him instead.

"Troublesome," he stated, and then opened the door to his car. "I'm going back to sleep."

"No, Shikamaru, wait!"

I surprised myself even by talking straight. He stopped, but didn't look at me.

"We need to talk. Come back to Jiraiya's house with Kiba and I. We can talk, and you can sleep in a bed tonight."

He looked like his was thinking about it. "No," he replied.

"Fine then." I sat down on the ground, and then laid fully on the wet concrete. "I'm not moving from this position until you agree to come to Jiraiya's with us."

He got in his car, and Kiba just stood there, probably looking between Shikamaru and I.

"Are you sure this is going to work?" he asked.

"No, but I figure eventually some kind of damsel in distress instinct will kick in, and he'll come out to get me."

"Are you sure it will?"

No response let my mouth. In fact, I wasn't sure that he would come out and get me. For all I knew, he could just leave me out here until morning, and then take Kiba home. By that time, Kiba would have probably given up on his both or none principle, and left.

I sat on the cold, wet, uncomfortable and hard cement for I have no idea how long. The rain kept on falling right in my face, and I was freezing. But I didn't budge. I wasn't going to until he came out and said he would come home with me.

Finally, his car door opened. "Nyah, you troublesome woman, you're going to get sick if you sit there for-"

"ACHOO!" I sneezed, sniffling a bit as I finished.

I didn't feel so hot.

"Come on, Sakura, you need to move. You're sick," Shiakmaru said, his head coming right into my vision and protecting my face from the rain. He was giving me his 'lazy and tired' look, but I didn't move.

"Are you promising to come to Jiraiya's house and stay?"

He didn't say a word, but looked over at Kiba. "Kiba, get her in your car and take her back," he commanded.

"I didn't bring my car," Kiba said, grinning nervously again. "It wasn't raining when I left, so I didn't think I'd need it. And anyway, my sister has it."

"Troublesome," Shikamaru said, looking back down at me.

I just glared back up at him, feeling another sneeze coming. "So? Are you just going t leave me out here?"

He sighed, frustrated. "A man can't just leave a woman out here, while it's raining, with a dog boy who is useless," he mumbled, but I knew what that meant. It was a yes.

He picked me up, bridal style, and I couldn't help but notice how strong he had become as he placed me in the backseat of his car.

A few seconds later, Kiba had gotten in the passenger's side, and Shikamaru has the car all started up and moving out.

"You know how to get to Jiraiya's from here, right Kiba?" Shikamaru asked, pulling out of the parking lot.

"Yep," Kiba said, and he began giving directions to Shikamaru.

After another sneeze, I drifted off into a sickness induced sleep. But I was happy. Things would be better tomorrow, I could feel it.

I had seen Shikamaru.

And he looked _incredible._

**A/N: Hope you liked it!! I liked it. And I think Kiba was actually pretty funny this chapter. You know, it's kind of great; I ended up writing 4 different ways that this chapter could work out. It was either going to be Shikamaru, Kiba, or Sasuke at the door. I chose this one after having a good friend of mine read it and pick the one she thought would work best into the storyline. APPARENTLY, my ShikaSaku fluff wouldn't have fit as well. I was sad. But if anyone wasnts to read the fluff chapter, just tell me, and I'll send it to you. Or post it as an alt. Chapter later on.**

**On another rant filled sidenote, that same friend was talking to me about how one of her loyal reviewers had ended up making a devinatart picture for a story of hers. She kept on asking me if one of my fans had, because, "They all seem to love you so much!" I said they hadn't. She was just trying to get on my nerves, I know, because Plan Sasuke Ino Breakup was more popular than her own. She was just being mean and picking on me. Isn't she cruel? And when she reads this, she'll know that I was talking about her, and it'll make her feel bad for picking on me, because I love all my fans, even when they don't give me art. Because art isn't all that a fan does. So there -nameremovedforhersake-. WHAT THEN?! XDDDDDD**

**Told you I would do it. ~Rai  
**


	15. Recessional

**A/N: My last chapter EVER!!... until I begin my new semester. ;P I hope you like it; I really do. As always, read and review. Because reviews really do help. And I want to know what you thought of the chapter. RECOMMENDED LISTENING: Recessional by Vienna Teng but only if you liek sad music that had nothing really to do with this. It's a really good song, and some on my inspiration came from that song, but it's not like I'm going to force you. Good song, though. So yeah, read and review. Ahaha, I don't knwo why I repeated that...  
**

I don't think I have ever felt worse in my life than I did when I woke up. The sickness swarmed into me, filling me with a disgusting heat. My nose felt runny, my head was on fire and thumping painfully, and my stomach felt nastily fully, even though I knew I had not eaten anything in a while.

"Ugh," I let out, my voice sounding clearer than my head felt.

"Well hello there, sleeping beauty," a male voice said. It sounded suspiciously like he was sick as well, because his words came out sounding like 'Well hello dere, sweeping booty.' I cracked open an emerald green eye to look over to the other side of the room where Kiba was sitting against the wall on his own bed.

One of the maids, who apparently was keeping watch on her two patients, brightened at my voice. "Sakura-sama," she said, coming over to me with a wet cloth. "Are you feeling any better? It seems as though your fever has dropped, but not drastically."

"I still feel horrible. Thanks for the cloth, though," I responded, my voice still sounding crisp and clear. As soon as she put the towel on my head, my body temperature dropped, and I felt amazingly better. That was weird. "Ah, that feels good," I said, smiling. She just smiled, and then went back to whatever she had been doing.

I saw, quickly enough, that she had been reading. She probably enjoyed sitting in the room with Kiba and I, if only for the reason that she didn't have to do much while we were sleeping.

"You've been out for two days now," Kiba said as I moved into a sitting position as well. "Well, the two days I've been awake, anyway. They said that I was asleep for about a day, but then again, I wasn't the idiot who decided to lie down on cold, wet ground in the rain, waiting for a certain Nara to help her."

My face, if it wasn't already, flushed, and I looked away from him to the quilt on my bed. He just had to remind me of why I was here, didn't he… "So, um…"

"Shikamaru's still here, if that's what you were going to ask."

"I wasn't!" I said defensively. "But that _is_ nice to know. "

"Would you like me to go get Shikamaru-san?" the girl asked, looking up from her book. "I will be back shortly."

"No, no that's fine! No, wait, come back!" I shouted, but she was already out of the door. "Damn it…" I said, playing with the stitching of the quilt again.

I dropped back onto the pillow, letting the cloth slide off my forehead. I closed my eyes, and tried to even my breathing into a sleepish mode.

I laid there, waiting for the sound of footsteps to echo into my ears, so I could just turn my face into my pillow and pretend that I had fallen asleep again. That's what I was aiming for, anyway. It's not that I didn't want to see Shikamaru, it's just that… Oh no, wait, that's it.

"You really suck at pretending to be asleep, you know?"

"Shuddup, Kiba," I said, opening my eyes again to glare at him. He just smirked.

"What, you don't want to talk to Shika-_kunnn_? Too scary for you?"

I deepened my glare, trying to scare him into silence. It was not working. "Why are you in here, anyway?" I asked angrily, trying to keep my voice from shouting. That too wasn't turning out exactly the way I planned.

"He didn't want to contaminate your room, and so it was just easier to stick us both in an unused room so the nurse-maid-lady could keep a better eye on both of us. And he said something about burning all the furniture in the rooms that we stayed in, so I guess it's easier to burn everything in one room than in two."

"He did not say that!" I protested, sitting up. Uncle Jiraiya might be ready to spend his money on a huge mansion and spend a little extra to keep some of the people who needed decent jobs off the street, but he was actually pretty stingy.

"Fine. He didn't. I just wanted to see you get all mad."

We sat in the silence for a bit, and I slid back down into my bed. "So you've been in here for two days, awake, watching me sleep? That's a little creepy," I said jokingly.

"I tried my best not to watch you. Anyway, there were usually people in the way."

"Oh? Like who?" I asked. I figured he just meant the doctor or the nurse; the usual people.

Kiba looked over at me, still sitting with his back to the wall. "Well, for starters, the doctor was checking on your fever when I woke up. Your parents came to see you while I was awake. They talked to me for a bit, then left. I think Jiraiya told them you were fine, just got caught in the rain. Naruto was in here a lot, bouncing around, trying to give you medicine that I highly doubt would have done anything but made you even more sick."

"I see…" For some reason, I felt kind of sad that Shikamaru had ignored me all this time. But then again, he didn't look very happy to see me when I saw him last.

"He was in here too, you know. Every day. For the longest time. He just never blocked my view. He would sit in a chair for hours, just watching you. He would talk to me some, but mostly, he just watched you. And if you thrashed around, then he was the first one to put that towel on your head, or to stroke your hair when you started crying. It was really disgustingly sweet to watch."

"I cried?"

"Well, more or less talked in your sleep a lot. You would say things like "No, Naruto, don't do that…" or "Sai, that looks really pretty." Well, when you were calm, at any rate. But you would go through episodes when your fever was apparently really high. The doctor said that your mind was going through delusions and hallucinations. You would start sweating and crying and talking. Things like "Shikamaru, please don't leave me," and "I don't want to be alone; it's so dark and creepy! Help!" In fact, you yelled a lot."

I turned red, remembering slightly some of the freaky dreams I had had over the past few days. I had this dream that Shikamaru had come to the door instead of Kiba, and he ended up leaving, and I chased him out to the driveway and it was dark and raining and I got lost in the woods near the house. That's all I really remember from that one…

"You know, it's kind of strange you remember all of that," I pointed out, looking over at him. He just shrugged.

"It's not like I wanted to listen. I don't want to hear your wet dreams about Shikamaru anymore than you want them to get out, but I didn't really have a choice, now did I?" Kiba smirked, probably happy to be getting the chance to make fun of me again.

"I DID NOT HAVE WET DREAMS ABOUT SHIKAMARU!" I shot up, supporting myself from the waist up with one arm.

"Yep, you're definitely awake…" I flushed once more, and Kiba and I both turned to face the newest arrival to our room: Shikamaru.

"Hi there, Shikamaru!" Kiba said awkwardly. I just dropped back into my bed, throwing the covers over my head.

"Please kill me now, please kill me now, please kill me now, please kill me now…" I mumbled, clenching my eyes shut and moving the pillow over my head.

I could hear Kiba snickering over on his bed, followed by the sound of footsteps, Naruto coming in, announcing that 'Kiba needed to, um, go,' and then we were alone.

All. Alone.

I'm not sure how long we spent there, in complete silence, my embarrassment keeping me from even poking my head out to look at him.

"Sakura…"

"Hi there," I said from under the covers. I heard him let out a frustrated sigh, and I felt a tug on my little cocoon.

"It's ridiculous to try and talk to you like that. Come out." Another tug. Harder this time. I clutched onto my saving grace, keeping it covering me completely.

"Look, we can still talk like this. I'll come out when I'm, you know, ready. Just please don't make me come out… I don't think my face has returned to its normal color yet."

"Ah."

Another long pause ensued.

"So why did you leave?" I asked finally, covers still keeping me hidden. It was easier to imagine him as my friend again if I didn't look at him. It was easier to imagine him as _my_ Shikamaru, and not some new fangled kid that grew up in the 7 or so months I'd been gone. He was the Shikamaru-in-my-head still.

"Huh? I'm still here."

"No, why did you leave your house? Did you just feel it was time for a break? A healing road trip or something?" I could imagine him closing his eyes and leaning the chair back, thinking 'Troublesome woman, always starts with the least consequential questions,' but not saying it because he knew that I'd get mad.

But who knew with 'New-Shikamaru.' "I just… It was something I had to do."

"Why?"

"Because I needed to get out for a while. I… It's just that… I needed to come see you, but I didn't… I couldn't just run up here. I needed to get my thoughts in order."

"Why did you want to come see me?"I pulled the cover down just a smidgeon, peering out at him. Just as I thought; he wasn't leaning back with his eyes closed. He wasn't staring outside, looking at the clouds. He was looking at the floor, twiddling his thumbs.

"Because you left. You left on a really bad note, and-"

"That was not all my fault. I seem to remember an angry you there, as well."

"Yeah, I know. I was upset. We never got to talk about it."

"I left, you were mad at me for doing it, end of story."

Another loud sigh. "Not that. And I wasn't mad at you, but that is besides the point. We never talked about you and Sasuke and everything that happened. It just happened, and then you left."

I began subconsciously playing with my hair, straightening it under my covers. "Do we need to talk about it? It happened; does it affect us?"

"Of course we do! And yes. It does affect… us."

I threw the covers off my head and sat up, eyeing him. He seemed kind of surprised that I had sat up, but it lasted only a few seconds. "How? How does it affect us? How does what happened with Sasuke have anything to do with you?"

I didn't mean to come off as angry or bitchy. I really, really didn't. But it just came out that way. Because, truth be told, I was getting angry, but only because this man sitting here wasn't my Shikamaru; he was a stranger in the shell of a friend. I didn't like it. I guess that was my fault, though… I was the one who left him.

"Because it hurt you. Because I was mad, not at you, but at me. I was mad because I couldn't stop it, and I didn't like not having any control over what was going on. It affects me because you were my friend, and you didn't do anything, and I couldn't do anything, and no one would do anything. It was frustrating."

"Shikamaru… it's not that I wouldn't want to talk about it if it was still a problem. But it's not. Sasuke is no problem for me anymore."

"If you saw him on the street…?"

"Then he better have a good cup on, because I plan kneeing him and then leaving. And I only want to knee him because I have a good feeling that he has a new girlfriend and she probably wants to do it herself."

"Oh," he said. "No feelings whatsoever?"

"I still don't like him. But it's not like I harbor secret love or the feeling that he has completely ruined me and I need to commit suicide."

Shikamaru didn't look at me, but instead just grinned. "As long as you're not planning to commit suicide, then I guess this talk is done with. And he has a new one, by the way."

I looked at my once-friend. I wasn't sure if we were still friends. Were we? I mean, he did said 'Because you were my friend.' So I guess not. But what if he was only saying that because he wasn't sure if I wanted us to be friends?

Gahhhhhh. Too confusing.

"A new what?"

"A new girlfriend."

"Of course he does," I said grimly. The conversation died, which made me think that Shikamaru had only thought that Sasuke would still be a problem. Silly him.

"So why were you mad last night when Kiba and I showed up at your car? Or, when I showed up?" He threw me a confused stare as I tried to re-ignite conversation, and I just looked at him. Why was he so-? "Oh, right. Um, four nights ago? Three? Five? Whenever I saw you last."

He tinged red, I swear, just for a second, but it was all gone in a moments time. "I…" He then proceeded to mumble something unintelligible.

"What was that?"

"I wanted to surprise you," he mumbled, a little louder this time. He refused to look at me, but I knew that he was blushing anyway. We sat like that for a while, and he bgan to open his mouth, so I spoke before he could start.

"Chouji and Ino were really worried about you." I was avoiding the real conversation I knew was coming, but I didn't know why. Maybe I didn't want to know the future of… _us._ Maybe I wanted to keep on imagining the fake relationship between head Shikamaru and I.

"Were they?"

"Who wouldn't be? I mean, you just left your house and wouldn't talk to them. Even Kiba was worried."

"Huh." He paused, stretching backwards in his chair. I could see his muscles stretching with him, and a sudden flashback reminded me of his naked upper half. I blushed. I mean, come on, who wouldn't? "Were you worried, Sakura?"

"What?"

"Were you worried… about me?"

Worried… Was I worried? About Shikamaru? My once best friend? The guy that I had a crush on for a long time? The one that was always there for me? The one that left his home because he needed to collect his thoughts and come talk to me? The one that had a picture of me? The one that got in a car accident because he was so upset over us arguing? Did he even have to ask?

"Yes. God, when I found out, I thought you were dead. I thought you were leaving for good. I couldn't control myself. I broke apart… Naruto tried to calm me, but all I could hear was… you."

And it was strange to see his reaction to the news that I still cared. That we were still friends. "Sakura…" he said, looking straight into my eyes.

"Sakura… is there an us? Is there still any chance…?"

"Of?"

"You know what I mean," he said, narrowing his eyes. He could tell I was trying to avoid the question.

I bit my lip, and pulled my legs close to my chest. "You've changed so much, Shikamaru, I just-"

"I'm still the same person," he said, tugging on my arm.

"Are you? Are you still the same person? I mean, look at you! You even look like a completely different species from the person I used to know. Can you look me in the eye and tell me you're still the same person you were when I left? That you haven't had a girlfriend, or you haven't changed something about you? That you still hang out with the same people, that you still dread going home because your mom might make you do more chores than usual? That you're still _my_ Shikamaru?"

He looked me straight in the eye, opened his mouth, and then looked away. "No. No, I can't tell you I haven't changed. But God, Sakura, you can't expect everything to stay the same once you go! You can't expect to go on some healing journey of your own and pretend that everyone else just had to stay the same! People change and grow. Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, in any kind of –ally way you can think of."

"I'm sorry," I mumbled quietly.

"I mean, look at you! You've changed, too. And not just physically, I bet. Sure, you may have changed on the outside, but I bet that you've learned something, and something about you has changed. Maybe you've developed a taste for… What did you say?"

"I'm sorry," I said again, looking up at him. "I just… I wanted you to still be the same Shikamaru I've always known. That no matter what happened, you'd still be there for me… I'm sorry… I just…"

Suddenly, the whole world that I had built for myself where Shikamaru didn't exist and the pain I felt from not having him there was only a way of keeping me down shattered. I saw him, sitting there, and I felt the yearning that had been buried deep inside of me come back out. It had always been there. I had always wanted it. But not the façade was gone. Now, he saw the Sakura without the mask. I began to cry.

"No, Sakura, please," he said, watching me as the tears began to pour. "I didn't mean to make you cry… I just wanted to get my point across, and…" That only made me cry harder.

I felt an arm around my shoulders, and a strong pair of arms push me over just far enough for a Shikamaru sized person to sit on the bed. "Don't cry," he said again, wrapping his other arm around me and allowing me to cry into his chest.

"I'm so sorry, Shikamaru… I didn't meant to make you mad, I just… I had this vision of you the other night, where you were doing everything I had never known you to do, like drink and do drugs and I got scared that you were going to be so different when I finally got up the courage to see you, even though you hated me, that it wouldn't even matter anymore.

"And I don't know why, but seeing you whenever I did, and hearing the coldness in your voice… that hope inside me died, and I think I was taking it out on you now but it doesn't even matter anymore and I really, really, really missed you. So so so much. And it drove me crazy that I hadn't seen you, but I didn't think you'd want to see me.

"And then Naruto told me you'd left and I couldn't take it, and then I realized that I had to tell you. I had to do it, just so that way you wouldn't end up like Dan, and I wouldn't have to be a Tsuande and then drive Naruto into insanity because I couldn't love him, ever, because I was still so deeply in love with you that even though you were dead that it wouldn't matter. I would never be able to move on and all would be lost but then bam! There you were but you hated me again and so I became angry with you. Angry at myself for leaving, and angry with you for being angry with me.

"So this whole conversation, I think, I've been trying to avoid it to keep my little dream of past you and past me alive but I realize that I can't keep on living on missed chances like she did because what if you did die? I'd be screwed. And then I didn't want you to change, but change is natural, right? So I'm glad you changed, because change, especially the way you look, I mean, geeze what'd you do, work out the entire time? But really, I'm glad you changed because I changed to, and if we can change while we're apart for this long and are still compatible and still friends and still perfect for each other according to everyone then what can stop us, right? There is an us, right? There's still a chance?"

He laughed, and the sound was a good breaker for my crying. He wiped the tears from my eyes. "I believe that was the question I asked, but I think, if what you said was true, yes. The answer to that is yes. There is an us."

I laughed with him, and the smiling felt good. Really good. "All of it was true. Every single bit of it."

"Then what did you mean about Tsuande?" he asked.

"It was a story Uncle Jiraiya told me," I responded, snuggling my head up onto his chest. He pulled me over and situated us to I was sitting with my back to his chest, his arms wrapped around me, and my hands on his knees.

"For the record, though, I didn't work out the whole time. But working out was a good way to not think, and since I was thinking about you a lot, I just did it."

"Well, I like it," I said, and I definitely meant it.

"I'm glad you do, because it would take a while to get rid of them if you didn't." I smiled once more, letting it sink in that my Shikamaru WAS the new Shikamaru. He was still the same; he could make me laugh when I was crying, and make me feel safe when I felt so vulnerable. But, he was different, too. Just like I was different.

In my mind's eye, I saw the Shikamaru-in-my-head grab the hand of the past Sakura, and walk off into the white abyss of my memories.

"Oh, and one more thing," he said. I twisted my body around so I could look him in the eyes. "In your incredibly long confession, you said something about being deeply in love with me?"

"Ah, you heard that," I said, faking dejection.

"What, now you don't mean it?"

"I still do. Of course I do. But I don't want to say anything about it because I don't want you to say anything about not knowing what love is. Because I'm pretty sure I do love you, Shikamaru."

He smiled, which made me smile, and then it happened.

He kissed me.

Shikamaru Nara kissed me, Sakura Haruno.

I, Sakura, just got kissed by my best friend.

It.

Was.

Amazing.

I could feel the fireworks go off in my head; it was like a million perfect sensations pop-popping their way into my brain, and my entire body felt euphoric. My lips tingled at the contact, and my body bured with pleasure.

My eyes closed once he put a hand to my face, letting his thumb stroke my jawline. My hand found its way to his hair by way of his own extremely pronounced jaw, and I let the softness run through my fingers. My other hand was placed on his solid chest, helping support me so I wouldn't collapse completely. If I had been standing, I thought I would have fainted by now.

No kiss from Sasuke ever came close to this one. Not by a long shot.

When he pulled away, panting, he pulled me back into his chest.

"Because I'm pretty sure I love you, too."

**A/N: I hoped you liked it! Remember to review: Maybe you thought their talk wan't good? Maybe you thought Sakura was out of character for this story? Maybe their whole interaction made you think,' They would NEVER do that!' or 'Why would she be so mad if she wanted to see Shikamaru! God, Rai, you suck.' I want to know, because that does help. Critism is just as, and maybe even very much more important thand just compliments. Because while compliments are amazing, and I lovelovelove them, I always get this feeling that everyone else who reads the chapter is jsut like "Psht, this is so make. Dumbass.' I know... I'm silly. XD It is also 1:23 in the morning and I'm tired, so the silliness might be in part to anothee side note, it snowed today. That was pretty awesome. I was going to say, I HOPE YOU LIKED THE TOTAL FLUFFINESS WITH THE KISSING. BECAUSE EVEN IF IT WASN'T THE FLUFFIEST, IT STILL MADE ME ALL WAMR AND FUZZY ON THE INSIDE. I've also been listening to Pandora Rasio for 3 days straight. LASTLY... GOODNIGHT.  
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	16. The Place Where I Belong

**A/N: OHMYGOD SORRY. SCHOOL AND EVERYTHING. AND UM WELL YEAH SCHOOL. THAT'S ABOUT MY LIFE NOW. WITH A FEW MOMENT OF MY TIME SPENT WITH WEBCOMICS. IISSOSORRY. Here is update. Good and bad news to be covered at the end. Read and review. Disclaimed: Don't own Naruto.**

I watched from above as all of his friends came to see him.

After being here just a few days, word had gotten out that Shikamaru was safe and staying at my uncle's house, and so they came. His parents, his grandparents, his band friends, Ino, Chouji, Kiba… They all came to see him.

I was more or less just a side attraction to the main event; the opening act to a great show, but I didn't mind.

"So, school is starting soon."

"Yeah."

"Have you made a decision?"

Sai stood next to me, peering down into the crowd from the balcony above. We both leaned on the railing, side by side, watching.

I sighed, closing my eyes for a second. Sai was about the only person here who just came to see me; that was something I could count on him to do. He didn't really like Shikamaru very much, he never had, and so I could just talk to him without being ignored for the disappearing Nara.

"No. not yet. I mean, I want to stay here with you and Naruto, I love you guys. But I don't want to be away from him. It's hard." I looked down, my vision being drawn to a certain spiky haired boy who was being yelled at, simultaneously, but his mother and Ino. I felt sorry for him.

Sai frowned, and looked at me. "It is really that hard? He can come and visit."

To Sai, the world was simple; he had two friends. He wanted to stay with those two friends. And no one, especially someone he didn't like even before he and I were friends, was going to come between that. My eyes became unfocused as I zoned out into nothingness, thinking.

Could I leave him behind again? Could I really say that I wanted to stay with Uncle Jiraiya, Naruto, and Sai? After being so far away, and then coming back to him…?

But then again, could I leave my two friends behind? Naruto and Sai have become like brothers to me; I don't think I could just leave them behind.

"I could always come and visit you guys…"

"It wouldn't be the same and you know it."

Silence ensued. I couldn't completely fathom why I was having this conversation with Sai; I knew I said I hadn't made up my mind, but that didn't mean I couldn't lean in a certain direction, and right now, I was leaning. I was the Leaning Tower of Pisa before all the countermeasures were taken to keep it from tipping.

And I was definitely leaning in the direction of Shikamaru.

As if he had heard my thoughts, the black haired boy turned away from Chouji and looked me directly in the eyes, and smiled.

My heart melted and the gooey mess started beating so fast that I thought it would leak out of my pores. The grin stayed on his face, and his white teeth shone in the light. I couldn't stop looking at him, but I didn't smile back. I just stared in awe of him.

I felt silly doing it, but hey. He was just so hot. Insert girlish scream and fainting here.

A look of worry creased his face, and he turned to Chouji. Chouji looked at me, and I had this feeling that Shikamaru was taking my ogling to mean I was upset, but it was too late; Shikamaru was on his way up the stairs, ignoring the conversation his mother was trying to have with him, and heading toward me.

"Your boyfriend is coming."

"Oh gee, really? I hadn't noticed," I replied to the ever obvious Sai, watching Shikamaru stride over to me with his hands in his pockets. In a matter of seconds, Shikamaru was leaning on the banister right next to me, frowning.

"You okay?" he asked, sounding somewhat worried.

I smiled at him. "Perfectly fine. I was just talking to Sai about what I was going to do for the next school year. About whether I was staying here or going back home."

"Well, wouldn't it be obvious that you're going home? I mean, you only came here to escape Sasuke, and home is well… home."

"Not necessarily. Her home could be here. She might want to stay with her best male friends," Sai said with his fake smile, and I knew this was going to turn out bad.

Like Sai calling Shikamaru gay or insinuating he had a small penis bad.

"I am her best male friend, so therefore, you're right. She'd want to come home with me."

Ughhhh romance novel drama.

" You're her boyfriend. Maybe she wants space from you, so that way you won't rape her or something."

Gahhhh, bad romance novel drama!

"Are you seriously saying that I'd rape her? Who are you to say something like that, some gay artist?"

Paperback, cheap romance novel!

"I am not gay, you blue-balls Nara."

Oh, Jesus, they've moved into bad shoujo manga now. Cue the thousands of fangirls with hearts in their eyes, ready to kill me because their two sexy princes are fighting over me.

"Why do you care so much, anyway?" Shikamaru asked, letting the first dose of suspicious boyfriend seep into the conversation. My heart swelled a little more, letting that term roll around in my head. Suspicious boyfriend. Mhmmmm.

"She's my friend."

"She's my girlfriend."

"She's been my friend longer than she's been your girlfriend."

My Naruto sensor went off, and suddenly I was sending out psychic signals. _Help. Me. Please, help me. Save me. NARUTO YOU IDIOT._

_SAAAAAAVE MEEEEEE._

"I've liked her longer than you've known her, so I fail to see your point."

Sai opened his mouth while I was still mentally screaming for a savior. Suddenly, the blonde headed boy I was thinking loudly for appeared out of thin air.

He's good at this ESP thing.

"On that note, Sai, you have to come down and um… look at this new painting Jiraiya bought," Naruto said, thinking on his feet.

"I don't want to," Sai replied bluntly.

"I don't care," Saruto said, grabbing the artist by the shoulders and steering him away from Shikamaru and I. Naruto winked at me, and suddenly I got the creepy feeling he _could_ read my mind.

Suddenly, Shikamaru sighed, and all of that suspicion was drawn back into his face. His strong, lovely face. His eyes were downcast, looking away from me, and he was still leaning on the banister.

"I thought it was all settled. I thought you were coming home."

I leaned next to him, letting my head rest on his shoulder. The people below us seemed to have small, awkward conversations going on, and I realized they had probably heard part of the conversation going on, and were trying to cover that up. Pretend they hadn't heard. It wasn't that big of a deal, but still.

"I-I'm not… It's a tough decision. I really, really want to come home, I do, but I'm so used to it here, Shikamaru. I like living with Jiraiya. I see my parents a couple times a month, and I get more freedom here. I'm doing better in school and everything, but-"

"It sounds like you've made quite a good life for yourself without me."

"Stop sounding like a depressed asshole, please? Like I was saying, I'm doing well her and everything, but there's one problem. I really, really miss seeing you every day of my life. I mean, really, _really _miss you."

"So basically, you're the traveler on the road that breaks off into two paths; the only problem is… neither of them is less travelled by, so basically you're stuck."

"A strange way to use that poem, but okay, I'll take it. Yes. I'm stuck. If it helps, though, I'm leaning toward one side."

"Mmm, really?"

"Yep."

We sat in silence, watching the people below us try not to let their eyes drift in our general direction while they talked.

"Which way do you lean?"

"Toward a place with blonde haired person and a black haired person."

"To Naruto and- Hey, wait… both places have a blonde haired person and a black haired person." I smiled as he made the realization that I could mean either, and I pushed myself away from him, still grinning. "Sakura, which place are you leaning toward? Sakura!"

But I was already down halfway to my room, leaving him to sigh and mutter troublesome on his own.

I walked into the space I called my own, and shut the door, frowning.

I wanted to be with Shikamaru, I really did.

But I loved it here.

The door behind me vibrated slightly at a knock came from my door. Thinking it was Shikamaru, I just let the door remain closed.

"Sakura, can I come in?"

"Oh, yeah, Uncle Jiraiya," I replied quickly, opening the door as fast as possible. He walked into my room, and sat down on my reading chair.

I sat down on my bed, and watched him.

He looked at me.

I waited.

The suspense builds.

"I heard the conversation you had with your little boyfriend," he said, eyes glinting with that mocking happiness he had when talking to Naruto. "Seems like you've run into to quite a problem."

I nodded. "I want to go home, I really do, but I love it here. And I don't think I could just leave Naruto and Sai here by themselves… Plus things could be really awkward at school if I went back…"

"Well that settles it, then," he said, folding his arms over his chest and nodding. "I'm kicking you and Naruto out."

"WHAT?"

"Like I said, I'm kicking you out. You two have been freeloading off me for way too long. I want both of you out."

I stared at him, mouth slightly agape. "But… Naruto has nowhere else…"

"He's going to live in my Konoha house."

"But you're kicking him out…" My mind slowed down with the weight of confusion taking over. Jiraiya had a house in Konoha? Whaaaat? And wasn't he kicking Naruto out of his care for good for being a free loader? Right?

"No, I'm kicking him out of _this house._ I like it here and all, but it's way too out in the middle of nowhere for him. So I decided to put that extra house to use. He's going to stay there with the person currently living there, Tsunade."

"You let Tsunade freeload off you and I can't stay here any longer? I'm family!"

"She's got huge hoo- I mean, lovely eyes, and I just can't say no to her." He grinned sheepishly, and I mentally face palmed.

Oh no, wait, I really did face palm.

"So you better be getting packed up; I'm sure your boyfriend would be glad to help you. I've got the boxes and everything, and the movers will be coming tomorrow, so you better get a move on. Hurry up now." Jiraiya, in one strangely graceful movement, stood up, walked over, and pulled me up. Using the arm his hand was attached to, he pushed me out of the door.

I tiptoed toward the living room, expecting to still see a crowd there, talking amongst themselves, but when I got there, it was empty. I hid behind the corner, able to see the back of someone's head and the face of another, but no one else.

Well, save for Shikamaru and Naruto, it was empty.

"Where did everyone…?"

"I told them to go out to eat and offered to pay. Only these two wanted to stay behind and wait for you. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to find what restaurant they all went to and then proceed to cry my eyes out at the bill." My eyes trailed him as he talked to Naruto, and then left the house. Naruto's blue eyes followed Jiraiya out of the door, and then to my hiding spot. Shikamaru, his back to me, took no notice of the blonde's smile.

I waved slightly, but motioned with my hand to keep my position a secret, and then I winked. Naruto winked back, a grin forming on his face.

In customary Sakura and Naruto style, we were about to play a game with our guest. It was the first time since Shikamaru had come that I felt up to it, and Naruto had been waiting for this to happen. I treaded softly down the stairs, holding my breath in, walking toward Shikamaru.

I could almost feel the smirk forming on his face.

"Sakura, I can hear-"

"Hey, Naru-chan!" I exclaimed, running toward the couch. At the last second, I jumped on the back, and then leapt into Naruto's outstretched arms. He pulled me close, and I leaned my head on his shoulder. "Naru-chan, please, I have something to show you. Let's go to my room," I said deeply in a seductive tone.

I could hear Naruto gulp, as if he were saying _What is she doing?_ But he played along. "Of course, my blossom. For you, a thousand times over." He began carrying me toward the stairs. I leaned back far enough where he could switch his hand to a position under my knees, and he carried me bridal style up the sturdy stairs.

I felt Naruto's arms tense around me, and I knew that Shikamaru was glaring a hole through his head. I peeked over at the Nara, and he was watching us, muscles tensing. Oh geeze, muscles. Crapppp. I had forgotten Shikamaru could probably kick Naruto's ass for doing this.

Oh well. Naruto was fast.

"Sakura," Naruto whispered in my ear, "what are we doing?"

"Well," I responded, "we're going to pack up my room. I'm going back to Konoha."

A shocked look crossed his face. "But weren't you still debating…?"

"I had the decision made for me, actually," I said, my voice betraying a small bit of passive aggressive anger.

"Really? Was it Shikamaru? Because if he's forcing you to do something you don't want to do, I'll beat him up for you. Even if he does look stronger than me, I will never lose!"

A small chuckle escaped my lips. "No, Jiraiya is kicking me out."

"THE OLD MAN IS DOING WHAT?!"

"Shh! He's kicking me out!" I said again. We were outside of my room by now, and Naruto was setting me down. I opened the door, and we walked inside. I shut it softly. "He told me that both you and I had been freeloading off of him for too long, so he was kicking us out."

The look on Naruto's face went from curiosity to surprise to horror. "Where am I supposed to live?"

"With Tsunade. In Jiraiya's Konoha home."

We both sat in silence for a minute, and then Naruto smiled again. "What about Sai? He'll be lonely without us."

I thought of the generally unchanging Sai, and smiled sadly. "Maybe he'll come back to school with us if he misses us that badly."

"I'll see if I can't talk it into him. Art school is good for him and all, but I have a bad feeling he's going to turn back into the creepy robot if we're not there."

I laughed, thinking of all the fun times Sai, Naruto and I had had together. We were a good team, we really were. "Maybe we've had a good effect on him. Maybe he'll open up to people more easily now!"

The quickly exchanged glances and burst of laughter told me that Naruto agreed with me: fat chance of that.

"I've got to go pack I guess. I'll leave you-"

A knock. An angry knock.

"Shikamaru," Naruto whispered, letting the terror seep into his voice. "Sakura-chan, help me get out the window! Quick!"

"But Naruto, we're on the third story! You can't just go sky diving from a window!" We were both whispering frantically, trying to figure out something to do before Shikamaru came in, used those amazing muscles, and ripped my friend apart.

He was already at the window, opening it, and I ran up to him, and wrapped my arms around his waist. "No, dummy! Get back in here! Stop it!"

"Let me be free. Please. Let me be freeeeeeee!"

The door opened, and Shikamaru walked in, witnessing me with my arms wrapped around Naruto and said boy about to jump out of the window. We both turned to face the newcomer, our eyes huge and scared. Naruto slowly stepped back into the room, and I released my arms.

"What are you two doing?"

"Well see, it all started with the joke-" I began.

"Yeah, the joke. And then she jumped…"

"And the jumping lead to the catching and then the sexy voices…"

"But you looked like you were going to kill me and…"

"Your muscles were tensing and it was so sexy but I thought you were going to kill Naruto…"

"And then were came here, and talked about stuff…"

"Like Sai!"

"Yeah, Sai! And then we heard you-"

"Naruto tried to jump out a window-"

"Well he scared me!"

"So I was just trying to stop him and that's what you saw…."

"When you walked in," Naruto finished. We both stood with our hands behind our backs, fiddling nervously with our fingers and staring at the ground. I peeked upward, and saw Shikamaru with his arms crossed, looking imposing and scary.

"Uh, so, um, I'm just going to, um, go." Naruto sped toward the door, too scared to look at either of us. I watched him leave, and then looked at Shikamaru, expecting to see cold boyfriend jealousy all over his face. But instead he was…

Grinning. Laughing, even. He broke the imposing stance to put a hand to his forehead and _laugh._

"Ahahahaha, the two of you thought I was _mad?!_ Hahahaha," he laughed, his smile illuminating the room.

"You looked livid!"

"Well I did walk in on my girlfriend with her arms wrapped around her best friend's torso, and if there's anything I know about you, it's you have a habit of falling for your friends." But the smile was still there, the laughter hanging in the back of his throat.

"Haha," I said sheepishly, falling back onto my bed.

Shikamaru stood there, watching me. "So, what were you going to tell him, anyway?"

"We were talking about where I was going to live next year."

"Seems to be a popular subject with people today," he commented, sitting on the foot of my bed.

"I came to a decision. Or, rather, had a decision shoved in my face."

"And?"

"I'm going to live in the same town with Naruto still," I answered, staring at the ceiling. I could feel Shikamaru's body slump, and he let out a small, dejected, 'Oh.' The weight from the foot of my bed disappeared, and suddenly, Shikamaru was walking toward the door. "Hey!" I said, sitting up suddenly. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Out to eat with my parents, I guess. And then home. I don't live here, so I can't stay any longer than tonight."

"But who is going to help me pack? I hate doing these things by myself," I said, frowning. He turned to me, looking confused. I tried to keep myself from smiling.

"You said you were going to stay in the same town as Naruto, right? He lives here."

"Coincidentally, Naruto's moving back to Konoha."

I let the news that I was coming back to Konoha, that I was going _home_, sink in.

A smile erupted on his face once more. "You're coming… back? You're coming back with your parents? Coming back to school?"

"Yep."

He walked over to me as I stood up, and he lifted me off my feet and twirled me around once. "Coming home with me?"

"Unless you don't want me anymore, in which case I'd just have to hook up with Naruto. You know how I am with my guy friends."

He laughed again, setting me down on my feet. "I guess we should get to packing, huh."

"Scientists have shown that will help me get my crap moved out of here, yes."

A maid came by with boxes, and Shikamaru and I began pulling things out of drawers and packing up my room.

"You know, the last time I was doing this, you were mad at me," I said, packing away books.

"I tend to get that way sometimes."

More silence.

"Hey Sakura-" Shikamaru said at the same time I started with "Shikamaru, I…" we both stopped, waiting for the other to continue. I felt like a giant cliché, waiting for him to talk.

"You go first," he said.

"I just wanted to say, I'm glad I'm coming back home."

He looked over at me, eyes shining. "I'm glad you're coming back, too."

**A/N: SO YEAH. I have good news, and I've got bad news. First of all, I want to let everyone know my sister has a story on here, _Been a While._ It's a really cute NejiTen story that she's been working on. She actually asked to redo a story of mine in her own way, so I did, and it's AMAZING. People say we write similarly, but GOD she writes so much better than me and I hate it, aha. SO GO READ IT PLEASE? Her penname is LadyNichole. Now, onto business: This story is ending soon, as in, next chapter is it, folks. It's been fun. *lovelove* So I guess that's the bad news. The good news is that I've got other stories in the works. A ShikaSaku one, two NejiTen ones, and maybe a NaruIno one, if I can pull the stories off my old computer. Oh yeah... my old computer DIED. Like, the charger BURNED on the inside and MELTED so I couldn't use it anymore. I've pulled the hard drive out of it, and my brother has a caddy for it (I think that's what they're called?) so hopefully I'll be able to get my work off of it soon. I really want to cotinue with my stories guys! And I had an Avatar one and another Ouran one and I want to write a DNAngel one or a Fruits Basket one. **

**To leave on a good note for me, NEW FMA SERIES STARTING SOON. *swoon* I'M SO EXCITED!**

**Love, Rai.  
**


	17. Graduation

**A/N: This is it. This is the last chapter. Sorry it took forever; I hope you like it. I was sad the entire time I was writing it. I mean, it's the end! I started this story a little over a year ago, and now it's over! I enjoyed writing it, so much. Thank you all for the reviews, favorites, alerts, and encouragement. You're all so amazing.**

**Read and review, pretty please? It is the last chapter.**

Today was my big day.

Every eye would be on me, every thought attuned to my pink hair, my green eyes, and my beautiful gown. Ino, Hinata, Naruto, Kiba, Sai, Chouji… Everyone would be there to see me.

Actually, that was a lie. They were all coming to see Shikamaru, the man of the hour, stand in front of the large crowd and speak the words he had been practicing for the longest time. After all, he had to get them right, didn't he? If he messed up, every eye would turn critical, especially his parents.

If he messed up his valedictorian (what did you think I was talking about, hmm?) speech, they would MURDER him, in his sleep or not.

I sighed, staring at myself in the mirror. Today was graduation, the biggest achievement so far in my life. I had suffered through years of school and worked my butt off to get to this point. I was nervous, I was excited, and I was relieved.

My phone buzzed on my bed, and I spun around quickly to pick it up.

"Hello?"

"_Hey, forehead, you ready? I'm about to be over at your house, and I don't want to wait for you. You better look hot, too! I swear, if I have to make you change, I will kill you!"_

I grinned at Ino's loud voice. "Yeah, yeah, I look fine, alright? I'll wait downstairs for you."

"_Are you wearing the black dress that I picked out?"_

"Yes, I am." I checked myself over in the mirror, looking at the outfit Ino had pieced together. It was a sleeveless black dress with a V-neck that showed a little more cleavage than I would have preferred. The dress tied behind my neck, and it ended below my knees. There was a slit up the right side, and the end had a tiny bit of lace on it.

Ino had coordinated our dresses so we all (Hinata, Ino, and myself) matched. Well, matched in the sense we were all wearing little black dresses.

"_And you're wearing the cute shoes? Because I don't want you wearing the same shoes as I am!"_

I had on simple heels, but knowing Ino, she was wearing her stilettos.

"Yes, Ino, I'm wearing my cute shoes. Now hurry up and get your pig-ass over here, because I for one am tired of waiting and want to get to graduation."

"_I'm here already." _I heard a honk from outside of my house.

"Oh." I closed the phone, slipped it into the handbag I on my bed, and grabbed my graduation gown.

I checked myself in the mirror once more, and got a weird sense of déjà vu about freaking out about my dress. I remembered doing this exact same thing at prom, checking and rechecking my deep green gown before Shikamaru came to pick me up.

He had looked gorgeous, of course. I remember the simple black tux perfectly. After we had taken pictures, he had declared the matching green tie and tucked in shirt too 'troublesome' and loosened each.

I remember thinking that he looked like a model in a magazine, shirt tails hanging out, blazer completely unbuttoned, tie loosened, and collar slightly open at the top.

A loud, repeating honk reminded me that I had somewhere to be that did not involve me drooling over my boyfriend and his I-am-completely-chill-and-I-just-threw-this-on good looks.

I rushed down the stairs, almost falling flat on my face toward the end, and hugged my parents goodbye. "See you after the ceremony!" I said, waving as I ran out the door.

"We're proud of you, Sakura!"

"Yeah, yeah!" I charged toward Ino's car, and jumped in the front seat.

The blonde gave me one look over, and rolled her eyes. "I'm going to have to do your makeup when we get to Hinata's," she said sourly.

Oh, yeah… I had completely forgotten about makeup in my nervousness about graduation. "It's not important, Ino. It's not like any teacher will be staring at me going 'That girl is not wearing any makeup, she can't graduate,' or something."

"They might," Ino muttered. "Anyway, I'm going to do it anyway. You know the first thing you will do once we all move our tassels over is go find that Nara boy, and we can't have you looking like an old hag."

"He's not… I mean, well… If you… don't… he won't…" I stammered, turning slightly red.

Ino grinned. "That's what I thought."

The rest of our quick drive to Hinata's house was in silence. Mostly.

"So I hear that Neji will be back in town for Hinata's graduation. That is one sexy piece of man," she said, blue eyes flashing dangerously.

I sighed. "For one thing, you have Naruto. And secondly, Tenten kind of has that market cornered."

"Yeah, but Naruto's been so unromantic lately. It's like we're married already and he doesn't need to woo me anymore," she said dejectedly.

"You are quite possibly the most temperamental , romance centered human being on the planet, pig."

"Is it my fault that I want to be swept off my feet? Your boyfriend lifted you off the ground while it was raining and stayed by your bedside until you woke up! How romantic is that?! God, I wish Shikamaru did that kind of stuff for me, I would fall for him on the spot!" The romantic sigh as she imagined a strong, non-Shikamaru-esque boy kissing her to wake her up from a coma or something sounded incredibly funny to me, and I couldn't help but snort.

"What?!"

"Nothing, Ino… It's just that Naruto did do that stuff for you. Who drove over to your house in the middle of the night to comfort you when your fish died? I mean, both Hinata and I hung up on you, but he rushed over and held you when you cried. I don't get how that could be unromantic."

Ino stopped as a stoplight, scanning the street before turning right. "But he doesn't do it anymore! I just want to be loved!"

We pulled into Hinata's driveway and maneuvered out of the car. I say maneuvered because, well, it was a lot harder to get out of the car in a dress that went halfway up my thigh than it was to get in.

"He does love you."

"I know."

Ino knocked on the door, and patiently we waited.

"Coming!" a deep voice said with a slight growl. Kiba opened the door, looking out at the two of us.

"Oh God," Ino said, frowning. "You aren't supposed to be her, Kiba!"

"It's here, run for the hills! Get away from the beast!" I said with a grin.

Kiba scowled. "Shut up, both of you. It's not my fault I'm here… Hinata asked me to come over and tell her which outfit she should wear and I can't decide which one looks better and I can't do it, so thank you for coming I need your help."

Ino and I burst out laughing at Kiba's confession. "She already has an outfit picked out, genius," Ino said, pushing past the brunette.

"Yeah, Hinata's just messing with you! Now, get out of here, it is girls hour. See you at the ceremony, Kiba!" I said, shutting the door as he walked outside.

I slipped through the halls of the Hyuuga house, heading toward Hinata's room.

"You were just a little hard on him, Hina, it's okay. Messing with your boyfriend every once in a while is a good thing," Ino assured her.

"Are you positive?"

"Yeah," I said, joining in on the conversation. "It's always good fun to see Kiba all flustered and confused."

Hinata smiled, and then picked up the black dress Ino has picked out from her bed. "I'm going to go change. Ino, the make-up is behind you. You said you needed to 'fix' Sakura?"

She slipped into her huge closet, and Ino grinned like an imp as she dragged me to the table.

"This is her graduation, and she forgets makeup! How dare her!" she mumbled under her breath as she applied the eyeliner, mascara, and eye shadow. "There, all fixed up!"

"You only put stuff on my eyes, Ino."

"This is graduation, not prom, silly! You don't need that much makeup! And anyway, your type of beauty is more natural. We just need your eyes to stand out, and you look gorgeous."

I readied my sarcastic, evil, vicious, witty, amazing, and perfect retort, but I was cut off by the sudden entrance of Hinata. Her eyes were wide; she looked frantic.

"Ino, Sakura, we need to get to graduation! We're going to be late. The advisor said to be there at 6 to make sure we all have our seats and robes and tassels and-"

"Geeze, chill out Hinata. We'll get there in time," Ino responded with a wave of her hand.

"We're LEAVING NOW," Hinata said, forcefully. Ino and I both turned to her, a strange mix of fear and surprise taking over our faces.

Ino gathered her things, and I picked up my bag. "Okay, sheesh, Hinata. We're going!"

The car ride to the stadium where graduation was to be held was quiet. We let the radio play as our nervousness began to build. It's strange to get nervous before graduation, isn't it? I mean, I'm going to graduate. I know I am. I'm going to attend a good college and try hard to be a doctor, just like my mother. I was ending one chapter of my life for sure, and there was no going back?

So why was I so nervous?!

I felt like slamming my head against Ino's dashboard when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I followed the arm until it connected to the body of Hinata, and I looked up at her face.

"Nervous?" she asked quietly.

"Extremely. And I don't know why. I mean, I know I'm gonna graduate and I don't fall easily, it's just-"

"I am, too," Hinata cut me off, smiling. "It's a big day."

"It's natural to be nervous, right?" Ino asked, sliding her blue eyes off the road for just a second as they met my green ones.

I nodded. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

"And it's not like you're going to have a hard time at college, Sakura. I mean, you and Hinata are going to be roommates! How unfair is that?" Ino pouted.

"Well, you're going to the same college as Kiba," Hinata said, a smile playing on her lips. "You better not try to take him away from me, Ino," she added.

Ino grinned. "Nah, I couldn't do that to you. But maybe if Shikamaru was going to school with me, I'd definitely steal his romantic self away with my good looks and seductive powers."

"Well, at least I'd have Sai to fall back on and love. If I can't have Shikamaru, Sai's just as good, right?"

"But we still aren't sure whether he's gay or not, Sakura. You'd have to be the crazy cat lady, forehead. There's no other man left for you."

"Not even Naruto?" I asked, watching the blonde turn to face me, tongue sticking out.

"Like he'd ever be interested in a billboard brow like you!"

"Ino-pig!"

"Forehead-girl!"

Hinata just sat in the back seat, laughing her head off, watching the two of us fight. I couldn't help but smile, breaking the mock fight to pieces. As we pulled up to the parking lot, we were all in fits of giggles. Ino had tears streaming down her cheeks, and I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt. Hinata waved us goodbye as she, still laughing, went to meet Kiba. Ino and I got out of the car slowly, still chuckling.

"Ow, my jaw hurts," Ino complained. "Too much laughter is not good for my mouth."

I laughed at her, my jaw hurting slightly, as well.

The laughter died down slowly as we turned to look at the looming stadium before us. I clutched my robe, memories of my high school years flooding into my brain.

"_God, Shikamaru, look at this place! I'm going to get lost on my first day…"_

_He surveyed the area quickly. "Doesn't look that hard to get. Only an idiot would get lost."_

"… _Smartass," I answered, glaring at him._

As it turns out, I did end up getting lost; the herd of other freshman I was following to my class were actually going to a completely different section of the school. And to make it even worse, Shikamaru was in my class, smirking as I walked in.

My mind drifted to the first day of junior year, after I had mysteriously gone missing for a few months.

_I remember staring at the school, feeling it look back at me and say, "Remember what happened here? Remember him? Sasuke? Yeah, he's here."_

_I grabbed Shikamaru's hand. "Let's go," I whispered._

"_You sure?" He asked, watching me._

"_Yeah, I'm positive." We walked into the brick building together, some eyes following our movements. Ino walked up to me, and grinned. _

"_Come on, this way," she said, pulling me away from Shikamaru quickly. He groaned, muttered something close to 'Troublesome' and followed. Ino pulled me through the crowd, and brought me to a group of people I knew. Well, my friends. _

_Chouji waved, Hinata gave me a hug, and Kiba stood there awkwardly and nodded at me in a greeting. I was about to ask Ino what in the world was going on when I felt someone attach themselves to my back._

"_Sakura, my loooooooooove~" Naruto announced loudly. I smiled, not turning to face him. He was so strangely dramatic and hyperactive. "I don't think Sasuke-bastard will be bothering you anymore, okay? If he does… Well, just tell me," he whispered into my ear. _

_Naruto was suddenly missing, and Shikamaru stood protectively by my side. "No need for that," he said. "I can take care of her."_

"_I can take care of myself, thank you very much," I said indignantly, winking at Naruto. He caught on instantly. _

"_Oh, you tell 'em, girl," he said, snapping in a circle. Hinata stifled a giggle._

"_There is nothing you can do to protect me that I cannot do by myself!" I said, walking away from Shikamaru and the rest of the group. I was just kidding, of course. I mean, it's what Naruto and I usually did. Shikamaru was even laughing at me, now. It felt just like old times._

_I walked up the stairs, still pretending to be all-that, a smile evident on my face. Yeah, just like old times here at-_

"_Oh, really?" a voice said. I froze. It sounded kind, but I knew it well._

"_Sasuke."_

"_Sakura."_

_I had stumbled across a gathering of people I rather would have never seen in my life, but I had found them. Sasuke, Karin, Suigetsu, Temari, Neji, Tenten, and a few other people. I suddenly wished that I hadn't left Shikamaru and Naruto behind, but there was no way to go and get them now._

"_What do you want?"_

"_You sound angry. I don't want you to be bitter, Sakura," Sasuke said. He was smiling, and I knew that he was just up to his old tricks. "You really were a good friend, and I'm sorry I ruined it. I still…" he trailed off, looking at the ground. _

_The compassionate, naïve side of me almost fell for it._

"_Just leave her alone, Sasuke," a feminine voice said. I looked up, startled. Was that Karin…? _

_No, Tenten. She looked at the Uchiha straight in the eyes as he turned to look at her. "You don't have to try and get Sakura back because your girlfriend left you. Just because people know Sakura's not a whore doesn't mean you have to ruin her again." She walked over and stood next to me, crossing her arms over her chest._

_I watched as a sneer formed on Sasuke's face. "This doesn't concern you, Tenten, so please lay off?"_

"_I already have a boyfriend, anyway," I said. Sasuke turned to face me._

"_Really? Hmmm, well, that doesn't mean we can't be frie-"_

"_Frankly, Uchiha, this girl is a friend of Hinata's, and I will not tolerate you bothering her anymore," Neji said, walking over to me. "And don't you ever talk to Tenten like that again or I will personally murder you."_

_Neji grabbed Tenten and I by the arm, and pulled us away from the group of teens. "Um, thanks, Neji, Tenten," I said slowly._

"_No problem, Sakura!" Tenten said, smiling. "I just couldn't stand to see Sasuke be a bitch to anyone again. Geeze, what is his problem, you know? That whole group just tries too hard."_

"_I don't mean to pry, but if you don't like them, why do you hang out with them…?"_

_Neji smirked. "Well, Hinata had a feeling you'd somehow manage to land in the midst of Sasuke without Shikamaru there, and she asked me to watch out for you. She said it was just something you did by accident, walk into problems and try to act tough."_

_I giggled nervously._

"_This is going to be the start of a wonderful year, right, Sakura?" Tenten asked. "My first day of senior year and I've already made an old acquaintance a new friend again."_

She was right. Over the course of the year, Tenten would become an integral part of the Ino-Sakura-Hinata group. Neji and Lee slowly joined our group of friends.

"_No, Ten, you can't graduate! What are we going to do without you?" Ino said as the end of the year grew near._

"_I think you'll survive, Ino," Tenten said, grinning. "I mean, I will come back to visit. I just can't leave you guys!"_

_Ino shook her head. "Every time you come back to Konoha, you'll be too busy with Neji to come and see us!"_

"_Yeah," I added in. "Since you guys aren't going to the same college-"_

"_Who said that?" Tenten said mischievously. _

"_The last we heard, you two were going to different schools!"_

"_Well, let's just say that was a lie. So when I come back to visit, I'll be so tired of all the 'Hn's' that I will need to see you to regain sanity!"_

_We all started laughing our heads off, feeling that maybe her leaving wouldn't be as terrible as we'd thought._

"We're going to different colleges, forehead," Ino said quietly, dragging me back to reality.

"Yeah," I said. "But it doesn't mean we'll never see each other, pig," I said, smiling.

Dramatic Ino was about to make a big appearance, I could feel it in my bones. "You and Hinata are going to be roommates, though! I don't want to lose my best friend," she sniffed.

"Ino, hun, I don't think I would ever be able to replace you as my best friend. I mean, it would be physically impossible. The second I did it, the world would implode, or Shikamaru would cheat on me or something. It would be against the laws of everything for that to happen."

Ino laughed, small tears in her eyes. We stood there, silently, watching the world go by us. We quickly threw on our robes and hats, making sure the tassels were in the right positions.

"Shall we go in?" I asked.

"Yes. Let's go," she said. We made our way through the hoards of seniors, who were all getting checked in and seated. "See you later, Sakura," Ino called, waving as she was lead to her seat. I waved back at her, following my marshal to my fold-out seat.

Hinata sat a few seats down from me. I waved, and she smiled. More people began to fill in the seats between us until the fold out chairs were completely filled, and the stadium began to fill as well. I could tell by the darkening of the sky and the arrival of the parents that the ceremony was getting close to the kickoff. I kept my eyes glued to the stage, where I saw a very familiar boy sitting with his eyes closed.

I couldn't help but emit a small chuckle as the ceremony began. I mean, come on, our Valedictorian was sleeping, on stage, on our graduation day. While the rest of us were nervous, he was relaxed.

It was just so like him to pull something like this.

"Welcome ladies and gentlemen… to your graduation!"

Cheers boomed from the mouth of every senior. I saw Shikamaru crack an eye lazily. He yawned as he slowly woke up.

"You've worked hard for this day!"

The principal kept talking, going on about how great we were, and how proud we should be. But I wasn't concentrating on her. I busy watching Shikamaru as he searched the crowd and finally came upon a bright pink mop of hair, hidden by a cap, and barely visible from where he was, I bet.

He smiled, and waved quickly.

"And now, your Valedictorian, Shikamaru Nara!" Tsuande backed away from the podium. A cheer erupted, with tons of clapping. Shikamaru stood up, and walked over to the podium. I could see the speech he had written (and not allowed me to read, might I add) in his hand.

The claps died down, and every eye focused on him.

"Hi."

He paused again.

"I would recite some lovely stuff about how we've worked hard, and we all deserve to relish this day. But you know that. I know that. Your parents, grandparents, brothers, sisters, and friends know that. We have pushed through these grueling 4 years. Some people have had to deal with more things than others, but we all had a tough time. And it's over.

"But that doesn't mean we get to relax, does it? For some of you, you'll be going to work. Work isn't relaxing. Work is hard. But you should be proud of it, because you are working, and from that work comes something to support yourself with. For those of you going to college, it's still a lot of work to get that degree. I mean, we are going to have to work our butts off, but it will pay off. If it doesn't I promise you I will be the first to take up arms and help you burn down the school." Laughter and cheers ensued.

"And I think this is what high school is meant to teach us. Not crap about how some people are better. Not that we can give up, and things will work out in the end. High school teaches us to endure. High school teaches us that everything we've worked hard for will pay off in the end. Whether that end is having the most fulfilling job, having a family, or retiring and watching the clouds every day until you die, I have no idea. High school gives us a taste of hard work, and today is the day we get to feel the sweet success of the 'pay off at the end.' So welcome, everyone, to the reward of high school!"

Everyone clapped. Shikamaru grinned, flashing his white teeth to everyone in the audience.

"But don't get too full of yourself, now. Enjoy the reward while it lasts, but this is just a taste of what the hard work of our lives will produce. Remember that, and every bad thing will eventually turn around."

He took the speech off the podium, and turned away. Everyone in the stadium was clapping; the seniors stood up as he shook the hand of the principal.

I felt tears sting at my eyes as pride filled my veins. Yeah, that was _my_ boyfriend up there, making amazing speeches. That was my boyfriend up there, being awesome. He was the one with the full ride to the college of his choice, and I couldn't be happier for him.

The smile that adorned my face continued as the names were called. The graduates were to be handed their diploma, shake the hand of the principal, and then shake the hand of Shikamaru.

I watched as countless numbers of people I knew went on the stage.

"Aburame, Shino," Shizune, Tsunade's assistant, called. Shino went to the stage, took his diploma, and shook the hand of Shikamaru, all without messing up. Not that I thought he would, but I was hoping someone I knew would mess up a little so I wouldn't feel so strange when I fell.

Because everyone knows I'm going to. It's just my luck.

"Akimichi, Choji." Chouji walked on stage, and I saw Shikamaru give him a strong handshake-turned-into-man-hug. The two of them laughed, and Chouji slipped off stage.

The people trickled upward, and I got more and more anxious as my name got closer and closer. Damn it, why did Ino have me wear these heels! I was going to trip and fall and look like an idiot, and I'd never be able to forget it! It felt as though the whole world began to heat up as she called the F's, and I could barely stand when the marshal called my row.

I followed the boy in front of me, concentrating on my feet so I wouldn't fall on my robe. I sensed suddenly that it was too long and that was going to be the reason I would trip. Oh God, I should have gotten a shorter robe!

"Hanizuka, Mitsukuni." The blonde ahead of me gracefully walked onstage, taking the diploma, shaking Tsunade's hand, and then taking Shikamaru's hand into his own. He practically danced off stage, eluding little flowers and specs of cuteness as he walked.

"Haruno, Sakura." I took a huge gulp. There it was. My name. Oh God. I was going to fall-

Wait. This was _graduation._ That was my _diploma._ I was so not going to fall. I walked onstage, steady, smiling, happy. I took the diploma, and shook Tsunade's hand. She had begun to call me her little protégée after I left for Jiraiya's house. As she put it, if Jiraiya can claim her relative as his mentee, than she can take his niece and do the same.

"Congratulations, Sakura. You've done well."

"Thank you, Madame Tsunade."

She smiled wider, and let go of my hand. I took my eyes off her and found them drawn immediately to Shikamaru. I walked over to him quickly.

"Congratulations, Sakura," he said, grinning.

"Congratulations yourself, Valedictorian," I said. I stuck out my hand, but he ignored it, opting to swoop in for a kiss instead.

"You better hurry back to your seat; I think the next guy is getting anxious," he finished as he pulled away. I couldn't help but grin from ear to ear as the next in line was called to the stage to accept his diploma.

The rest of the ceremony flew by. I had a feeling, as I looked at the piece of paper in my hand and the warmness of Shikamaru's kiss, that I was in a daze, but it didn't matter. It was over. Finally. Over. There was nothing left to do where I could embarrass myself. I had made it. I was graduating.

"And now, graduating class of Konoha High School, move your tassels from the left side to the right. You are now done with high school!"

I felt my heart race and excitement take hold as I moved the tassel into its "Look at me, I'm a graduated kid!" position. Everyone around me stood up, and began moving to their friends. Because at Konoha High, we don't march out; we just dissipate into smaller groups.

And exactly as Ino predicted, I went searching for a certain spiky haired Nara boy that I really, really wanted to see. More than anyone else in the whole world at the moment, I wanted to see Shikamaru.

"Hey, kiddo. What are you doing, keeping a lookout for someone special?" I turned around to face Shikamaru, who was not wearing a graduation cap.

"Nah, just you," I said, grinning. "So, Shikamaru," I said, pretending to be a reporter. "You've done it. You've graduated top of your class-"

"Yeah. And you just graduated," he interrupted jokingly.

I ignored him. "You got accepted into one of the best colleges in the country, and you have the best girlfriend ever. Where do you go from here?"

I saw a look of mock shock pass over his face. "I have the best girlfriend ever? Can I meet her, right now? Because I'd love to see her and compare the two of you."

"Oh, ha ha," I said. "But seriously… congratulations on everything. It's going to be weird, not seeing you in the fall."

He eyes melted into a warm chocolate brown. "Even if we're going separate places, Sakura, we'll still see each other. I'm not far, at all. And you know I love you."

"I know. I love you, too."

He pulled me into a tight embrace, letting his lips press down on mine.

My hand slipped up the back of his neck as his held its place on my lower back.

As soon as we pulled away, he smiled.

"I'd say we've done pretty well for ourselves, wouldn't you, Sakura?"

I looked out across the field as Ino, Naruto, Sai, Hinata, Kiba, Shino, Choji, my parents, his parents, and what seemed to be millions of other people made their way toward us.

I looked back at him, and then leaned into his chest. He wrapped an arm around me, and placed his chin on top of my head.

"Yeah, I'd say we have done pretty well."

**A/N: OHMYGOD THIS IS MY LAST AUTHOR'S NOTE FOR I, Sakura. As always, I apologize for any grammatical errors. It's 12:50 am and my wrist hurts like a madman. Thank you all for everything you've done for me. I would have given up forever ago if I didn't have the support from all my readers. I love you guys! As an FYI: I'll be taking a hiatus for a bit while I work on all my new stories (YAY!) and finish up with my junior year! I only have 6 days left plus exams, so I should be putting some new things up soon. And with that comes a new ShikaSaku story, so if you liked this one, please, add me to Author Alerts!**

**It's crazy that I'm sad this story is ending! I wish it could go on but then the updates would take even longer and you guys would kill me. GAHHHH. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU. You guys have pushed me to write a story that over 3 times as long as Plan Sasuke Ino Breakup. I know there isn't as much fluff as would be liked, but there is some, and everyone loves fluff. In fact, I'll be adding the fluff chapter up right after this one, but technically, this is the last chapter. **

**THANK YOU**

**~Rai Lockhart.**


	18. Ch 14 ALTERNATE FLUFF

**A/N: This is the alternate CH.14 FLUFF. It's not canon in my story; I wrote a lot of possibilities for this chapter, and this was one of two that I completely completed. There have been requests for it, and so here I give it you you.**

"Sakura, please… come home?"

"Shikamaru," I gasped, taking in his full appearance. His ponytail, normally spiked high, was hanging limply behind his head. His jaw had become more pronounced since his 17th birthday, and the green vest coupled with an incredibly amazing looking black shirt showed off muscles that I don't think I could ever have imagined in my wildest dreams.

I just stood there, staring, feeling quite inadequate next to this god-like man standing before me.

"Sakura?" he asked, his voice bringing me an inch closer to the situation. "I've had a lot of time to think when I was… Well, you probably don't know, so I won't bother. God, never mind, this is much too troublesome. I'm sorry, Sakura," he said, turning away from me to head back out in the dark cold world without me. He looked so nervous, so disappointed.

I thought about letting him walk away from me. I thought about letting him go back out, and do whatever he had been doing for these last two weeks, worrying Ino and Chouji and heck, worrying me to the bone. I thought about letting him go, like Tsuande had done with Dan all those times.

So instead, I reached out for him, grabbing his arm, shivers running all up and down my spine. He stopped, and his entire body tensed at my touch. Suddenly deciding that that impulse probably should have been buried instead of acted out, seeing as how he reacted, I pulled my hand back. Maybe this whole admitting this wasn't as easy as I had thought it was going to be. Maybe it was actually really, really hard.

"What do you want?" he asked simply, still facing that dark outside world.

"I…I…" I stumbled, trying to find something to say other than, 'I'm sorry, my bad,' and 'it's raining.'

Nevertheless, he didn't start walking away when I stumbled, so I figured that something must be keeping him here. He must be curious to hear what I had to say.

"N-n-nevermind…" I said, backing up into the house.

An image of Tsunade, looking at a soulless Dan (whom I couldn't imagine very well at all, to tell you the truth… He looked a lot like Shikamaru. But that's very much besides the point.) flashed through my mind, and I stopped dead in my tracks. I took the two steps required, wrapping my arms around his waist.

He was freezing.

I didn't care.

I leaned into him, pressing my cheek into his back, and I closed my eyes. I could feel the muscles of his back move as he shifted his glance to the sky.

"Don't leave me," I pleaded. "Please don't play the part of the stupid teenage girl who leaves her best friend and goes away. Please." I could feel his body tense once more at the 'best friend' speak, but I could tell that he was still listening to me.

"Nyah, troublesome girl," he said, still staring at the sky.

Then, he pulled my hands away from his waist, and I thought he was going to leave. He didn't want me. That is what he had come here to tell me. No no no no no. No, this isn't happening. My eyes filled up with tears again, and my heart panged painfully as he took a step forward. He was leaving me. He still hated me. I was weak, pitiful.

I wasn't worth it for him. He took another step forward, and it looked like he was struggling with something. Maybe he was trying to decide whether to take pity on me or just leave, like I knew he would.

But then, he turned around, and wrapped his arms around my own waist.

The next thing I knew, my face had been pushed against his very solid feeling chest, and I smiled. I hooked my arms underneath his, and placed my hands on his shoulders.

I could feel the fabric of my shirt soaking up some of the water of his own, and his hair dripped all over the top of my body. None of it bothered me, though. He was here.

_Alive._

I could hear his heart thudding quickly, and my own beating right in sync with his. We were both nervous. Nervous, but content.

We stayed like this for ages, and I felt like hugging him for this long was what I was supposed to be doing. I loved it. I wanted to keep it going and going and going.

He made me so happy. I wondered why I had even looked at another guy like Sasuke when I had someone like Shikamaru by my side the whole time.

"Sakura, you're going to catch a cold if we keep going like this too much longer," he mumbled, his chin resting on my hair.

"I don't care."

"Well, I do. I'm going to take you inside."

"No," I said, pushing my head off his chest just a little bit to look up at him. God, I loved looking up at him so much. His eyes were the same warm brown ones I had always seen, the ones that I dreamed of every night. They were basically the only part of him that had stayed the same.

"Sakura, what do you mean-" And then, he saw the puffy eyes, the tear tracts, and remembered the sadness that had been in my eyes a second ago, when I opened the door. His eyes widened, and I just stared back up at him. "Sakura, what were you crying about?" he asked.

I just turned my head to the side, laughing a bit. "Nothing. It's nothing. Everything's fine." The Shikamaru-in-my-head, who still looked the same as he had when I had left all those months ago, smiled.

_Told ya so._

"Hey, kiddo. Look at me. What's up?" He placed his hand under my chin, and moved it to face him again. He was worried. Even after all this time, he was so worried about me crying.

I leaned my head into his chest again, closing my apple green eyes. "I was so worried."

"About?" he asked, still completely oblivious to what I was talking about now. For a genius, he could sure be stupid sometimes.

"You. Ino said you were gone, and that no one could talk to you but your parents. They were all so worried. I was worried. Everyone was worried."

"But my parents knew where I was the entire time," he pointed out, still missing the point that I cared about him so much that I was still worried, even if we hadn't spoken in so long. "They knew I was safe. Why be worried about me, Sakura?"

I nuzzled my face into his chest, still grinning like an idiot. "You could have been _dead,_' I pointed out. For some reason, he tightened the muscles in his chest, and then, he laughed.

And I loved hearing the laugh from his chest, listening to it as it began and loving every moment of it.

"You don't have to laugh, Shikamaru. It's possible." But I was smiling, so happy with myself and with him and with the entire world.

"So you were scared, huh?"

"Terrified. Petrified. Horrified. All for you," I said, poking him in the chest. I felt his grip around me tighten. I couldn't even feel the chill the rain water was providing; the warmth in my own body just from embracing Shikamaru like this for so long was enough to keep me warm for ages.

"And to think, the only thing I was worried about was that you were falling in love with another jerk."

"Oh, so now you're saying that you wouldn't care if I died, huh?" My tone was light, but I was getting worried from what he had just said. Did he only like me as a friend? I mean, he wasn't worried that I was falling for another guy, just another jerk. What if I told him, and he didn't feel the same way?

Maybe this whole hugging for eternity thing wasn't the best idea. Maybe I should just go inside.

But then a voice rang in my head that sounded suspiciously like Jiraiya's.

_You'll regret it. Don't find excuses._

I felt Shikamaru lean close to my ear, and my breathing stopped for seconds at a time. My heart raced, and I was glad he was looking into the house and not at my scarlet red face.

"Now you know that's not true," he said, his voice becoming huskier and deeper, and his breath playing along the side of my face.

My whole body burned with a desire to kiss him. I wanted to kiss him so, so, so badly. I wanted to feel my lips crash into his. I wanted to find passion. I longed for it. I yearned for it. Every fiber of my being needed to kiss him.

However, I bottled the urge, and just stated content with holding onto him for dear life.

"Oh? And how do I know? You were so mad at me that day… You hated me…" Quietly, I trailed off into nothingness, staring blankly at his shirt. My mind rushed back to him, hatred in his every feature. Hatred for me.

His face had moved from my ear back to my head, and he sighed. "I didn't hate you, Sakura. I never… I mean all those emotions you saw? I was mad at myself for not being able to stop you. I hated myself for not being able to keep you there, to protect you, to stop you from having to go. I hated myself for being weak."

I stood on my toes, and placed my head on his shoulder. "You aren't weak. You've never, ever been weak." It was a fact. For me, he had always been the strong one. The tower.

"You think so?"

"Yeah, I re-" My words were cut short by the sudden feeling that _I wasn't touching the ground anymore._ My eyes widened as I realized that I was face level with Shikamaru, and a pair of incredibly strong arms were supporting me.

I remembered Naruto talking about how strong and smart Shikamaru was, and how he could take care of himself. I couldn't agree more.

"Oh, haha. You really are the strong one now," I said quietly, grinning.

And a very, very small part of me thought that not only could he take care of himself, oh no. But he could also take care of me.

All thoughts of that were swept away when I realized he was looking into my eyes with an incredible desire that I had never seen in his eyes before. And they were so soft, just staring at me like I was the only thing in the world worth looking at.

For a second, I thought he was going to kiss me, and I became completely occupied with the thought. I itched to know the exact taste of his lips and the feeling, the rush, I would get from kissing him.

But instead, he kissed my forehead. The area his lips touched burned with passion, on my end, and Shikamaru's arms moved from my waist.

One arm went under my knees, and the other was holding onto my back, wrapping its way to my torso. Out of pure instinct, I wrapped my arms around his neck, and cuddled up to him. Shikamaru carried me, bridal style, into the house, and set me down on the couch.

"I didn't want to risk you getting sick, kiddo. It was too cold out there," he said sweetly.

Apparently, either Jiraiya or Naruto had been watching this whole exchange between us, because as soon as Shikamaru sat down, a maid came running in with blankets and the cook came walking in with a warm drink. We both gratefully accepted both offers, and to my non-surprise, I spotted a white haired man at the junction where the right wing and the living room met.

The tall Nara boy made sure that I had a blanket surrounding me before he even bothered trying to get one situated for himself. Before he could lift up the warm quilt, I had grabbed his arm and wormed my way into his lap.

"This way, you can give me some of that really good looking drink without dumping it all over me, since I know you won't let my hands out of here to grab it," I rationalized.

Shikamaru snorted. "It's troublesome doing all of this for you," he said. I sensed a _'But I wouldn't have it any other way,'_ echoing unsaid from his mind.

"Yeah, well, it's troublesome not being able to do it for myself because you're refusing to let me, you know?" I mumbled, and then cuddled up onto his shoulder. I made sure to wrap the blanket around him, letting our still wet fronts touch.

After a few minutes of sitting there, in complete silence and stillness that was only interrupted by him forcing me to drink some of (admittedly delicious) hot chocolate, I began to feel my eyelids droop.

It wasn't that late at night, but I was spent. I had used up the entire day reading a book I hated, crying over someone that hated me, and then having him show up in person and feeling my heart explode in pure, unadulterated joy.

I nuzzled closer to his shoulder, and felt his arms wrap around my body.

"Sakura?" Shikamaru whispered lightly in my ear, still holding onto me.

"Yeah?" I said sleepily, cracking open a green eye to look up at him.

"I… See, I've just…" His words were getting lost in his mouth as he looked away from me to the door. I closed my eyes again, preparing to go back to sleep on his surprisingly comfortable body, when he stopped me once more. "Sakura?"

This time, both of my eyes opened. I felt him push me up, closer to his face, and suddenly, I wasn't very tired anymore. I looked at him, waiting, wanting.

"Yeah, Shikamaru?"

But he didn't respond; instead, he leaned into me, and his lips crashed onto my own. I felt my entire body explode in a million sensations, and my heart began to race once more. The passion in his kiss was enough to make any girl fall head over heels in love with him, but since I already was, all it did was exemplify my yearning for him.

The rush was incredible.

It ended all too quickly for me, and he pulled back, looking ashamed and embarrassed.

"Don't hate me, Sakura… I just…" he mumbled again, and I could tell that he thought I didn't enjoy it. Like I still saw him as a friend and only a friend.

That, coupled with the incredible urge to kiss him once more, forced me to press my body against his own, and kiss him again. I could almost feel the surprise in his kiss when it happened, but I didn't care. I slid my hand into his dark hair, and his thumb traced my jaw line. His other hand was on my lower back, keeping me in place, and my hand was reaching around his back. His strong, muscled back.

After what felt like two seconds, we had to pull back for air. My mouth was tingling, and my heart was still beating at 1000 miles per hour, but I didn't care. The kiss itself was phenomenal.

Sasuke in no way, shape or form, could ever beat out Shikamaru. Ever.

I cuddled up against Shikamaru's shoulder once more, smiling like a fool. I felt his arms around me, and his hand was stroking my hair.

I don't know how long we sat in the perfect silence, but I didn't care. Being here with him was a dream come true.

"Sakura… I really missed you. Nothing was the same without you there."

"Yeah, yeah," I said, eyes closed, but a smile still on my face. "I really missed you, too. You don't know how many times I thought of you since the last time we saw each other."

"I'm just that important to you, huh?"

"You're _the_ most important thing to me," I said sleepily, trying to stay awake for our conversation. I felt him kiss the top of my head again, and my face turned slightly red.

"Really? Because that's kind of how I feel about you, as troublesome as it seems," he admitted, hugging me tighter once more.

"Even more important than Chouji or Ino?"

"Yes, and in a completely different way."

I knew exactly what he was talking about. With that, my mind slowly faded away into the dark abyss of sleep.

In my stage of twilight sleep, I felt a strong pair of arms that I could tell weren't Shikamaru's lift me up. The person whom I had just been sleeping on awoke with a confused start, and then I heard a loud gulp. I wondered what was going on.

"Look, sir, it's not my fault that she fell asleep on me…"

I heard the crack of knuckles, and I got worried.

"Naruto, take the girl to her room. I want to make sure that this boy doesn't get a wrong idea about my niece."

Naruto's shoulder, which he apparently had slung me over, was not very comfortable. Not very comfortable at all.

I tried to protest, telling Jiraiya that it was alright, but I was too tired. So it all came out to be just mumbled words, mashing up together in a confusing manner. "OoncleRaiya dun do nothing shimaru…" I mumbled, head leaning against Naruto's shoulder blade.

"Shh, be quiet, Sakura. I want to hear Shikamaru get 'The Talk' from Jiraiya. This ought to be good." But I reached up a hand and hit him in the shoulder, making him give off a dejected 'ow.'

"Itsa priviiite cunvorstation," I mumbled sleepily, enjoying the feeling of being carried to me room. Well, minus the bony shoulder and all. "Dun listun."

"Geeze, fine, you little drunkard," he said, chuckling over his own joke of calling me a drunkard even when I wasn't drunk.

But I was too tired to even care what he had called me, and too happy to even bother trying to figure it out.

Shikamaru had come to see me! He didn't hate me. He was alive. We were friends. Everything was falling into place once more.

"Night, night, Sakura-chan!" Naruto exclaimed, sitting me down on the bed and trying to wrestle the blanket that had covered Shikamaru and I a second ago from my grasp. But I didn't let go, and he gave up, leaving me to my sleep.

"Goodnight, Naruto," I mumbled, watching him leave the room.

Shikamaru was in every one of my dreams that night, but this time, I never woke up crying.

**A/N: And it is done. Sorry for any major or minor errors. It's still pretty rough, but I thought I'd share.  
**


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